11 Subtle Habits That Reveal A Rare Woman With A Brilliant Mind & A Big Heart

Written on Dec 05, 2025

rare woman with habits that show her brilliant mind and big heart CoffeeAndMilk from Getty Images Signature | Canva Pro
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There's something incredibly magnetic about the way a woman carries herself when she doesn't need to rely on being the most dramatic or loudest person in the room. It's the way that she commands attention the second she walks into it, and how that demeanor means that people are naturally gravitating towards her. She likely doesn't know how intelligent or captivating she really is, but there are subtle habits that reveal a rare woman with a brilliant mind and a big heart.

She doesn't make a big deal with how kind and caring she is. She's the kind of person that moves through life with a confidence about her that make others feel instantly comfortable in her presence. It's usually the habits she doesn't talk about that end up setting her apart from other women. It's habits that are always intentional and shaped by how self-assured she is. These women know exactly who they are and they refuse to make apologies about it, which is why they know how to genuinely live their lives. 

Here are 11 subtle habits that reveal a rare woman with a brilliant mind and a big heart

1. She listens with a full presence

woman listening to friend being fully present Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock

She's not just nodding along, staring off into space while the other person talks to her, or even going as far as to pull her phone out in the midst of a conversation. Instead, she's genuinely there. She's listening with her entire being, to the point where you can tell that she's truly absorbing everything that she's hearing.

"Being a truly effective listener takes effort and life experience. It requires patience and dedication to wanting to help others. Most importantly, the listener must set aside their own wants and needs and be present so as to fully and genuinely listen to the speaker," explained psychologists Shoba Sreenivasan and Linda E. Weinberger.

She's maintaining eye contact and even going as far as to catch little details that might have been missed by someone who isn't as present of a listener as she is. She'll even ask questions — not just the surface-level kind but actual deep, thoughtful questions. 

Even if you're sitting across from her, rambling on and on, she won't ever make you feel insecure about it at all. It's that kind of patience and attentiveness that is the reason why she's set apart from everyone else.

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2. She lifts people up when they doubt themselves

woman comforting friend lifting her up DexonDee | Shutterstock

Because one of the subtle habits that reveal a rare woman with a brilliant mind and a big heart is lifting others up, even if she refuses to let some people in her life, the ones she cares about wholeheartedly always feel like they're enough. 

Rather than coming to someone with some cheesy, motivational line that probably won't fix anything, she just tries to be a calming presence that hopefully helps people feel less alone.

Despite how self-assured she might be in that moment, she's definitely no stranger to having those creeping thoughts cloud her brain. She knows that feeling doubt about yourself can really twist your self-worth, so she never wants others to feel as if they're alone in that fight. 

The best thing that she can do is offer her support, which is sometimes all that people need when they're struggling with those negative thoughts.

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3. She doesn't rush to judge anyone

woman hugging friend not judging her Sanja Miljevic | Shutterstock

The second she meets someone or hears their story, she's not jumping to unnecessary conclusions based on preconceived notions. Instead, she gives people the space to be themselves and, therefore, they usually end up feeling safe in her company. 

Having this mindset comes from the fact that she knows people are complex and they usually have layers. She might judge, but she's never being judgmental, which, as explained by clinical psychotherapist Charles Harper Webb, is based purely on having an immense amount of empathy.

Because of that, she actually cares enough to look beyond the surface when interacting and forming connections with people. Her first instinct is always curiosity not immediate judgment and criticism. 

She wonders what people are going through and, more than that, she genuinely cares and wants to be of service in anyway that she can. She would rather lend a helping hand than conspire behind someone's back about what kind of person they are and what they may be lacking.

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4. She celebrates other women effortlessly

friends celebrating and exchanging gifts Miljan Zivkovic | Shutterstock

She doesn't see other women as competition in the slightest. Instead, she sees them as people to be inspired by and uplift. She supports all women whenever they are winning and she doesn't ever feel the need to be catty or envious. 

Another woman's success doesn't take away from her own and, if anything, it can be a nice reminder that some things are possible, especially achievements.

Her praise and acknowledgement of any woman is always sincere because she genuinely wants to hear about the wins and good times. She won't hesitate to cheer a woman on when she gets a promotion at work, for example, because it's a milestone worth celebrating.

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5. She sets boundaries with grace

happy older woman looking out the window sitting at home fizkes | Shutterstock

Boundaries are something that matter quite a bit to women like this. They aren't going to be harsh or defensive about it when it comes to protecting her peace and moving on. 

Instead, she gives what she can and what she can't or what doesn't feel right for her, she'll simply walk away. She understands that boundaries go hand-in-hand with how she views and feels about herself.

"For some of us, saying yes to some or all of these things is the right move. For others, it's not. Self-care is knowing our own particular priorities and our limits, and honoring those limits," insisted licensed psychologist Jordan Fiorillo Scotti.

She simply refuses to tolerate behavior or actions from other people when she knows that it makes her feel insecure or unworthy. What makes it even better is that she's not over-explaining or even uttering a single apology for these boundaries. She's simply honoring her needs, and whoever doesn't like it, there's the door.

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6. She keeps her promises even when she's busy

woman walking with friend outside keeping a promise PeopleImages | Shutterstock

If she says that she's going to do something, she does it. Not because she feels like she has to, but because she values the weight of her words and never wants to back out of something after she's just promised that she'll show up. Keeping promises is simply one of the subtle habits that reveal a rare woman with a brilliant mind and a big heart.

She finds a way to follow through no matter what her schedule might looks like and that kind of consistency makes her a good person to be around. When someone is counting on her, she takes it seriously. 

Even unintentionally, she can't stand missing out on a promise and it ends up really weighing on her. That's why she does a good job of prioritizing her time so she can show up when she said she would. 

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7. She never stops learning

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One thing about a woman who has a brilliant mind is that she never wants to stop learning, ever. She's never afraid to admit when she doesn't know something and instead sees it as an opportunity to grow and challenge herself even more. 

That mindset makes her an exciting person to just be in conversation with, because it feels like not only are you learning something from her, but she's also more than open to learn something from you too.

"Just as our bodies are in constant renewal through processes like cellular regeneration, our minds also crave a similar sense of evolution. When we learn something new, develop a skill, or stretch beyond our comfort zones, we nourish this innate drive for progress," life coach Susanna Newsonen pointed out.

And this need to learn doesn't come from a place of wanting to impress anyone, except for herself. She learns because she just genuinely enjoys knowing and understanding how things work. Whether it's picking up on a new skill or become proficient in a language that she never used to know, she's enthusiastic about expanding her knowledge and worldview.

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8. She speaks kindly to herself even on her off days

woman speaking kindly to herself in the mirror Hitdelight | Shutterstock

When things aren't going right and life just feels extra heavy, speaking kindly to herself is another of the subtle habits that reveal a rare woman with a brilliant mind and a big heart. She is making sure that she's being kind to herself above all else. 

Despite how much confidence she exudes, it doesn't make her exempt from having off days just like everyone else. Rather than adding to the negative by talking down on herself, she acknowledges the feelings she may be having without an ounce of judgment behind it.

She doesn't just sit there and beat herself up nor does she want to be her own harshest critic. It's about staying consistent with the self-love and taking herself out of her own head. When she finds herself in these kinds of moods, she'll immediately practice some self-care routines to come back to herself

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9. She laughs at herself easily

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She never takes herself too seriously, even when she messes up or does something awkward in public. She's constantly able to laugh at herself and keep it pushing rather than immediately getting embarrassed. She's simply able to find the humor in the moment because she knows that mistakes are inevitable.

"If we have good ego strength, finding humor in who we are or what we do not only reminds us of our humanness, but also promotes positive interpersonal interactions and relationships. It's good for our well-being," encouraged Sreenivasan and Weinberger.

Rather than beating herself up over them, she'll joke about it and find humor in any situation. Laughing at herself doesn't mean that she doesn't have moments where she can be serious, either. 

She's still able to own her actions and learn from her mistakes. But she refuses to let the idea of trying to be perfect steal the ability to feel an ounce of joy and laughter.

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10. She remembers the small things people say

woman listening to friend talk about the small things Tommy Lee Walker | Shutterstock

Considering she's also an attentive listener, it would make sense that she's able to easily remember the small details that people say to her. It's not just the big moments that have happened in someone's life, but the tiny details and offhanded comments that others might make. 

Her memory of these things that most people might end up forgetting is just how she shows love to the relationships that mean the most to her.

"Regardless of what we wear or how we look, we are always naturally more engaging and approachable when we are focused on others, instead of ourselves; and when we are genuine rather than simply gregarious. Remember that, and others will remember you,"  behavioral analyst Wendy L. Patrick insisted.

It's the kind of attention that makes people feel seen and that someone genuinely cares enough to want to be apart of their world. It's a reflection of how much she values people and treats them with respect. She's not just listening for conversation sake, but she's actually listening with the intention of learning more about that person.

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11. She doesn't take advantage of someone's kindness

woman putting eye mask on friend being kind AnnaStills | Shutterstock

A rare woman with a brilliant mind and an even bigger heart never wants to do to someone else what she won't like done to her. If someone is offering their time and support, she never just assumes that it's within her right to take as much of it as she wants. She would never want someone to do that to her, so that awareness makes it easy for her to avoid trying to exploit someone's generosity.

If someone is offering to lessen her load in any way, she's not pushing or demanding they do more. In the same breath, she's not insisting that people drop whatever they're doing just to assist her, even if she knows they would in a heartbeat. 

It's about being able to appreciate someone's goodwill for what it is, and not thinking that you are owed anything more than that. She doesn't want people to bend over backwards for her and, in the process, neglect their own needs.

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Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.

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