12 Low-Effort Ways To Stay Social For Introverts Who Get Exhausted Quickly
You don't need to "get out more" — just get smarter about the kind of socializing that actually feels right.
stockfour | Canva ‘You should get out more and make more friends!’
As a 41-year-old firmly in the introvert camp, I don’t know what to do with this information. I like people, but I don’t want to be around them all that much. But I also don’t like going long stretches without talking to a soul.
There are plenty of ways to nurture your relationships and stay engaged with your community that actually align with how you're wired. The key is finding social activities that energize rather than deplete you, and building connections at a pace that feels sustainable. So, what works for people like me?
Here are 12 low-effort ways to stay social for introverts who get exhausted quickly:
1. Get a coach or mentor
Regular one-on-one conversations with someone invested in your growth give you a meaningful and direct connection without the energy drain of group dynamics.
Dr. Kate Schroeder, a therapist who works with introverts using the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and the Enneagram, emphasizes the importance of working one-on-one with someone invested in your growth. She adds, "It may take the help of a therapist to begin to be able to see how your defensive structure differs from your true spirit."
2. Join a small recurring group
Jacob Bentzinger / Unsplash
Whether it’s a men’s/women’s group, book club, or hobby meetup, this is a way to connect with the same people, a predictable format, and deeper connections over time.
3. Have standing coffee dates with one friend at a time
This is much easier than group hangouts, as you can have real conversations and control the energy and timing.
Scheduling a 'standing date' makes socializing part of a routine, which can feel less daunting than spontaneous events. An article by Harvard University explained that introverts can plan their energy levels around these predictable commitments, ensuring they have sufficient time to recharge beforehand.
4. Take a class or course
Yoga, art, survival, cooking, whatever interests you. The structure removes social pressure while giving you regular contact with like-minded people.
According to psychotherapist Stacy Bremner, when you're engaged in learning something together, the shared activity naturally creates conversation starters and opportunities for meaningful interaction without forcing empty small talk. Seeing familiar faces week after week builds comfort and connection gradually, allowing friendships to develop organically around genuine shared interests rather than the awkwardness of forced socializing.
5. Try a language exchange
Martin Podsiad / Unsplash
I met many friends when living in Tokyo by joining exchange forums and setting up meets with locals in cafes.
6. Become a regular somewhere
Pick a coffee shop, gym, or local pub where you go often enough that the staff know your name. You get social contact without having to perform or make conversation because the interaction is predictable and comfortable.
By becoming a regular, you've created a social 'home base' where you can be yourself. A recent study has found that this builds a foundation for more authentic connections with others, which is an important way introverts can maintain a social life without becoming overwhelmed.
7. Find an accountability partner
This is someone you check in with weekly about your goals, projects, or challenges. It’s purposeful social contact that actually helps your life rather than draining your energy.
According to life coach Tony R. Smith, one of the most effective aspects of coaching is playing the role of supportive accountability partner through scheduled weekly check-ins. This model transforms social contact from obligatory small talk into meaningful connection with a clear purpose, making it energizing rather than exhausting for introverts who thrive on intentional, goal-oriented interaction.
8. Volunteer for something that matters to you
When you’re focused on the task at hand, you’re not forced into small talk, but you’re still around people doing meaningful work together. The shared purpose makes socializing easier.
9. Host small dinner parties
No Revisions / Unsplash
You control the guest list, timing, and environment completely. Invite 2–4 people max, cook something simple, and you become the social hero without leaving your nest.
The act of hosting and nurturing guests can provide a strong sense of satisfaction and fulfillment. Research suggests that acts of kindness, such as bringing people together, can release feel-good hormones.
10. Take walking meetings or phone calls
Movement makes conversation flow more naturally, and you avoid the intensity of sitting face-to-face for the full duration. Your body is occupied, so your mind relaxes.
According to life coach Ann Papayoti, one of the most effective strategies for difficult conversations is changing the setting. Movement activates your body, giving your mind something to focus on besides the interaction itself.
11. Have a workout or walking buddy
You’re doing regular physical activity with one person, which means you’re doing something healthy together, and conversation springs up naturally.
12. Schedule short video calls with distant friends
This keeps you social without any travel time, you can end the call whenever you want, and you maintain important relationships from your own space.
Research does caution that the benefits are linked to the quality of the interaction. While valuable, virtual interactions do not fully replace the benefits of face-to-face contact.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. He's the author of the Mastery Den newsletter, which helps people triple their productivity.
