If A Man Says These 11 Phrases On A Regular Basis, Keep Him In Your Life Forever & Ever
Roman Samborskyi / Shutterstock In the world of relationship coaching, it’s common to hear people talk about phrases that should be an instant dealbreaker. Our society is all about vetting through elimination, but you can also vet people based on what they say.
Some phrases are great indicators of a man who is actually able to be a great partner, both long-term and short-term. These phrases, in particular, tend to be green lights for a happy partnership.
If a man says these 11 phrases on a regular basis, keep him in your life forever & ever
1. 'Would you like me to listen or to help solve the problem?'
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I swear, this phrase is golden for so many reasons. This is a great phrase to hear a guy say because it’s a sign that he’s emotionally mature enough to handle problems intelligently. Many men assume that a woman complaining about something wants them to handle the problem.
At first, this sounds like a good thing, but it’s not. Sometimes, we just want to vent and have someone validate our feelings. Men who say this phrase realize that there are multiple ways to solve a problem and are more likely to talk things out.
2. 'What do you think?'
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Psychologists all agree: feeling heard is a basic human need, especially in relationships. Yet so often, women end up feeling unheard by partners when dating. One of the most common complaints in long-term relationships is that men don’t listen to their wives.
In many cases, this is an issue that seemed small at first but kept getting worse until it was too late. A little prevention is key. While it’s not always a guarantee that they’ll stay that way, seeing a person ask your opinion on a regular basis is a good indicator that they will continue taking your opinions into consideration.
3. 'I don’t know'
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Though this may seem like a bad thing to tell people at first, being able to actually say you don’t know the answer is a major green light. Studies show that our society tends to value quick, confident answers, even when it’s clear that there is no quick solution. Insecure people tend to buckle under that pressure.
Being able to say that you don’t know something shows that you’re very careful about your words and that you won’t let insecurity guide you. It’s also an indicator that you’re likely more honest than others who would fudge things around. That’s a great sign!
4. 'It’s alright to feel that way'
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If there is one thing that can really indicate a great partner in a long-term relationship, it’s how well they listen. Good listeners are active listeners who take in what they’re told and ask follow-up questions. Great listeners will also validate feelings when other people might not.
For example, if you’re feeling torn about a specific situation, sometimes all you want to hear is that you’re normal. Hearing this regularly indicates that you’ll always feel safe talking to your partner, even when others may balk.
5. 'How can I make things better?'
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Is it me, or does it feel like dating has gotten more selfish in recent years? People seem more fixated on what they can get out of a relationship than what they want to offer their partners. Wouldn’t it be refreshing to actually hear someone say something that isn’t just about them?
You want to find a guy who doesn’t just talk about himself and his needs. This isn’t just a matter of seeing that interest in the first couple of weeks. It’s also a matter of seeing him continue to say this throughout the relationship.
6. 'I’m sorry. I was wrong'
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By the time most of us hit 30, we have met someone who genuinely could not admit they were wrong. It’s a common (but terrible) trait. Amanda Rose, PhD, notes that people who refuse to admit guilt or wrongdoing tend to have narcissistic, highly insecure traits. In other words, they would rather be right than be happy.
People who refuse to apologize or own their mistakes tend to be pretty difficult in relationships. Trust me, trying to force them to say sorry gets very old, very quickly.
7. 'I don’t feel comfortable doing that'
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Most of the time, guys generally won’t tell their dates when something is upsetting to them. They view it as embarrassing or as a sign of vulnerability to someone they’re trying to impress. Believe it or not, a man who pipes up about how he’s *really* feeling on certain topics is a major green flag, even if it doesn’t feel that way.
A man who actually tells you when he’s not comfortable is a major green flag. He’s less likely to ghost when things get tough, and studies show that it’s also a sign that he feels okay being vulnerable around you. Both of these things are good signs!
8. 'I do see a life with you, and yes, I have a timeline'
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Ever notice how men will often lie about their intentions to get what they want? Sometimes, guys won’t admit that they don’t want to marry you but will spend years telling you that it’ll happen “someday,” when they’re “finally ready.”
A man who tells you that he sees a future with you, doesn’t tell you to “see where it goes,” and gives you concrete days and times is a man who is serious. Just, you know, make sure the timeline doesn’t shift.
9. 'Here, let me cover that for you'
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People might think this is a bit old-fashioned, but men who offer to split the bill are doing so for a reason. It’s a guy’s way of showing that he can bring something to the table and that he’s genuinely happy to spend time with you. It’s also a sign of good manners and a sign that he wants to provide.
While it’s not considered to be mandatory for a guy to pay for a coffee or a date, the fact is that it speaks volumes about the man in question. At the very least, it shows that he doesn’t feel entitled to your company for free.
10. 'I’m pretty average, I guess'
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Did you ever notice how the best people in the room tend to be the most humble? They also tend to be more realistic about where they stand. This is an example of the Dunning-Kruger Effect.
The Dunning-Kruger Effect is a psychological phenomenon that suggests that smarter people tend to overestimate their own knowledge. Meanwhile, people who tend to have below-average intelligence are far more confident in their brains. Hearing your partner mention they’re fairly average memes, they’re both likely humble and intelligent, too!
11. 'Give me a moment. I need to process all this'
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Let’s just face it: life is stressful these days. Bills rack up. Paying is hard. Arguments happen, mishaps occur. Most people tend to keep chugging along, not giving themselves time to actually handle things on an emotional level.
A person with enough emotional intelligence to take his time and ground himself is a man who can handle the stress tests of a relationship. It’s also a sign that he knows himself well enough to be able to know when to take a step back. That’s a rare trait these days—and that’s a trait that can make him a keeper.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, Newtheory Magazine, and others.
