9 Strict Rules Taylor Swift Allegedly Makes Her Boyfriends Follow
Swifties probably already know a lot of these.
Jamie Lamor Thompson / Shutterstock If there was a song for every single time Taylor Swift talked about one of her previous relationships — well, we’d have her entire discography.
All jokes aside, Swift has been through a lot of relationships and has documented all of them within her songs, so it’s no surprise that she has high standards for the people she wants to date. She’s talked about it a lot in her interviews, so we thought we’d cover all of the things she wants from her man.
Here are nine strict rules Taylor Swift allegedly makes her boyfriends follow.
1. Her boyfriends have to want kids.
Before you get into a serious relationship, you have to find a way to suss out whether or not your potential partner wants to have kids or not. If you’re not both on the same page, there’s going to be heartbreak later on.
In 2012 when Swift was on the cover of Cosmopolitan, she revealed what she wanted most aside from her musical career was to be a mother.
"Being a mom full time, doing everything for my kids, having a bunch of them,” she told them. “One day, I'm sure. But that's the only other thing that could be as thrilling for me as doing this.”
Luckily, Swift's rumored boyfriend Travis Kelce seems to fit the bill. In an episode of his “New Heights” podcast, Travis joked about having kids so his mom would love him again.
“Wait until you find the right person," Kelce's mom, Donna, advised. "Find the right person.”
Not only does he want kids, but apparently he's good with them, too.
"He is like the absolute best uncle you can imagine," Travis' sister-in-law Kylie Kelce told PEOPLE. "I tell everybody, he comes to our house to visit and the poor guy doesn't sit on the couch because our daughters will be like, 'No, no, you sit on the floor. We're gonna do a puzzle. We're gonna build blocks. We're gonna do this, we're gonna do that.'"
2. He has to be famous — or at least successful.
All of her exes are celebrities. All of them. If you’re going to date one of the most successful musical artists of all time then you’re going to have to be at least somewhat successful. According to a source who spoke to HollywoodLife.com, she sees it as a requirement that her boyfriend can match her success.
“She wants someone on her level when it comes to their career, plus, they have to be hot – like leading man hot,” they said.
Fortunately for Swift, Super Bowl-winning NFL player Kelce meets those requirements.
3. Her boyfriend must be capable of collaborating with her.
As a singer, songwriter, and arguable actress (Cats? Really?), she wants someone who she can work with to either advance both of their careers or just as a fun couple activity.
In fact, she’s done it several times in the past. In 2009, while she was working on her third studio album, Speak Now, she was dating Taylor Lautner, who coincidentally starred in the movie she was acting in — the 2010 comedy, Valentine’s Day. She collaborated with Calvin Harris on the hit song “This Is What You Came For,” and was featured on John Mayer’s “Half Of My Heart,” back when she was dating them (not at the same time, of course).
She also had some help with songwriting from Alwyn as he has been credited on a handful of her songs like “Evermore” and “Champagne Problems.” And despite their romance being fairly new, Swift and Kelce already have one collaboration under their belt, both making cameos on Saturday Night Live's Season 49 premiere episode.
If you’re going to date Swift, you better be able to contribute to her career.
4. He has to be okay with having a song written about him.
This one might seem like a joke, but it’s the inevitable truth that all of Swift’s exes have had to encounter in their lifetimes. She WILL write a song about you, whether it has to do with the breakup, how you got together, or how it’s going. People will eat up all of Swift’s songs about love and heartbreak — it’s literally what she’s known for.
Recently, she released a 10-minute video for the song "All Too Well" which she wrote nearly a decade ago but rereleased recently that was allegedly about her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal.
She's also believed to have written quite a few songs about Joe Alwyn, whom she broke up with in April 2023.
5. Swift’s boyfriend must have at least one sister and a good relationship with his mom.
When that source leaked to HollywoodLife.com that Swift had “as successful as me” on her list of boyfriend demands, they also mentioned that his family life is important to her too.
“She wants a guy that has at least one sister,” they said, “because she thinks it will make him a better boyfriend.” Not only that, but “He has to have a good relationship with his parents, especially his mom, but he can’t be a mama’s boy.”
She probably thinks it would be in the same vein as having a sister because how you treat the most important woman in your life is likely going to be indicative of how you treat the next most important woman in your life, not including any sisters.
Another checked box for Travis Kelce, whose sweet relationship with his mom and sister-in-law is well-documented.
6. Her boyfriend also has to get along with her family.
As you can probably tell from the previous rule, family is important to her. True Swifties know that she’s kept a close relationship with her parents over the years, even as they went through a divorce, and her brother is one of her best friends.
Her family moved to Nashville, Tennessee from Pennsylvania in order for her to be able to pursue a musical career in country music, and once brought home Tom Hiddleston to meet them. Meeting the parents is a big deal, and so is meeting all of her friends — which he did. According to E! News, Hiddleston became close to the family while filming I Saw the Light and even went on a double date with Swift’s close friend and granddaughter of famed musician Hank Williams, Holly Williams.
"The group got along great and it ended up being a long 3-hour dinner," said an eyewitness.
While Kelce may not have met Swift's family yet, he's on his way to bonding with her friends. Swift brought Blake Lively, Ryan Reynolds, Hugh Jackman and Sabrina Carpenter to one of her new man's NFL games this season.
7. The guy has to make the first move — she won’t.
Swift wants her man to be interested in her all the way — if he wants to be with her, then he better show it. During an exclusive interview with TheBoot.com, Swift revealed her rule regarding how she treats her relationships.
“I have this rule: I don't call a guy first. You can't ever send two text messages in a row,” she said. “If they don't answer your text messages, then that's fine. Don't stress it out and send another text message.”
She says that you should be confident, a whole person, and that you shouldn’t “need” to talk to someone else.
“If you're like, 'I need to talk to you! Why didn't you call me back?' — if you're that girl, then nobody's going to want to date you,” she explained.
Once again, Kelce fits the bill. In an episode of his New Heights podcast, he discussed his attempt at making the first move while attending Swift's Eras Tour.
"If you’re up on Taylor Swift concerts, there are friendship bracelets and I received a bunch of them being there, but I wanted to give Taylor Swift one with my number on it,” Kelce said. While his plan didn't exactly pan out as he planned, his effort clearly didn't go unnoticed by Swift.
8. He better not play any games.
Swift is not getting into a relationship to play mind games or wonder whether or not his heart is really in it — she needs her man to give his all.
“All you can do is be honest and real with him as you get to know each other,” she said, according to E! News. “Deciding not to play games is the best way to go because it keeps things simple: If he messes it up by playing around with your heart, you'll know he doesn't deserve you.”
If he’s not ready to commit or tries to mess with your heart, then he’s not worth any of the trouble.
9. If you wanna be her lover, you gotta get with her friends.
In the same way that her family needs to like you, her friends need to like you — but I’m not talking about her home friends, I’m talking about her A-list girl posse.
In 2015, during her cover interview with Vanity Fair, she talked about how she needs her friends to like the people she dates and why it’s important to her.
“Oh, it’s so important. In every friendship group, you’ve got one or two girls where you hear people say, ‘Oh, she’s so different around her boyfriend!’ I never wanted to be that girl,” she said. “So that was a huge goal of mine: never ever become someone else for the sake of a relationship.”
She wants her group of girlfriends — which includes A-list celebrities like Selena Gomez, Emma Watson, Cara Delevingne, and Gigi Hadid — to keep her in check while also improving the quality of their relationship.
Swift is a high-A-list celebrity, therefore her demands are set at an unsurprisingly high standard.
Hopefully, Kelce is capable of following all these rules, because if not, her next man will!
Isaac Serna-Diez is a writer who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Follow him on Twitter here.