Photo: Bogdan Sonjachnyj / Shutterstock
Justified or dramatic?
By Zayda Slabbekoorn — Written on Nov 07, 2022
No one likes a cheater, not when it's a beloved celebrity, your friend's boyfriend, or even a stranger. But, what happens when it’s your family? Your mom, dad, brother…sister?
An anonymous Reddit user on the "Am I The A--hole" subreddit posted about having to deal with just that dilemma.
The AITA forum on Reddit allows users to share their controversial stories in hopes of feedback on if they’re the “a-hole” or not.
The 27-year-old man has a sister named Carlie who was dating her boyfriend for several years. Quickly, her boyfriend became a part of the family — hunting with them, talking regularly, and joining the family for vacations and events.
He caught his sister cheating on her boyfriend with one of his best friends — and they’re now engaged.
As the news started to leak about the beloved ex-boyfriend, the whole family seemed to immediately agree in condemning her behavior.
Disgusted with his sister’s actions, the brother shared the reality of the “whole sh--t show” that followed the cheating news.
“I loath cheaters and I sure as sh--t don’t support their weddings. I cut my sister off after everything came out. My parents understood at the time but assumed I’d relent eventually," he wrote.
To his dismay, his parents seemed to soften up and welcome the idea of attending and being a part of the wedding.
Still, he refuses to make contact with his sister and has ignored all wedding invites and plans.
“There are a few things”, he openly shares on the thread, “that my family has done in the past 2 months to manipulate me.”
Ignorant of their son’s wishes, the family continuously adds him to group chats for the wedding with his sister and her fiancé.
“I left the chat.”
They also persuaded the fiancé to ask the brother to be a groomsman — multiple times.
“I declined.”
Going as far as to lie to extended family, his parents tagged him on wedding social media posts and told everyone he would be at the wedding.
He continued to refuse. He would not attend a cheater’s wedding — even if it were his sister.
Now forced to block the rest of his family, attempts to contact him seemed to continue flooding in. The whole family, including the fiancé, were chaotically obsessed with his attendance at their wedding.
At family gatherings, the fiancé continued to make attempts to mend things with the brother.
“I’ve told him multiple times that I don’t respect him or my sister, and to leave me alone.”
When the couple’s wedding party rolled around, the parents pried at their son again, wondering “what they were supposed to tell people” about his absence.
As made incredibly clear over the course of the past few months, the son replied with, “the truth” — “I don’t stand cheaters.”
When his phone started to blow up during the party, he was met with name-calling from extended family — he was “selfish” and acting like “a child.”
Using the party as an opportunity to get on their family’s good side, the sister and fiancé decided to slander him at their party for his absence.
Instead of sharing the reality of their relationship, one successful by cheating, the sister said her brother didn’t come because he “didn’t like her fiancé because of his hobbies."
She told family members that he was "too busy to attend" his sister's wedding party.
Furious at his sister’s blatant lies and disrespect, he immediately got into his car and drove to the wedding party.
Storming into the backyard, he went straight for the mic — where he thought to give an honorary speech to his cheating sister and her fiancé.
As the crowd hushed and eyes turned to him, he noticed his sister’s face of pure panic.
“The lies my sister told you are not true. I’m not attending the wedding because I don’t support cheaters.”
Leaving immediately after the speech, rumors of chaos ensued. Apparently, following his dismissal, the whole party went crazy.
Blaming him for ruining the party, his parents demand he apologize for the speech.
Turning to Reddit, he asks users if he was justified in his actions, believing he shouldn't have to apologize.
“If it weren’t for my sister’s lies and disrespect,” he demands, “I wouldn't have had to do that.”
Most users clearly agreed and thought that it was his sister who was the real “a-hole”.
“There are other excuses to make (i.e. work obligations, etc) instead she chose to slander your name,” one user assured, “I’d be p-ssed too. Do I think you went too far? Yeah, I wouldn’t have chosen that path, but you needed to clear your name.”
Another user added, “[They] crossed a line when they started lying about it. Could you have been more polite about it? Yes, but f--k ‘em. They brought it upon themselves. No sympathy for cheaters.”
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango. They cover topics ranging from pop culture analysis to human interest stories. They are currently based in East Lansing, MI. Catch up with them on their Instagram or TikTok.