Photo: Instagram
Channel your inner Lorena Bobbitt and take a bite outta this!
By Rebecca Jane Stokes — Written on Jul 20, 2016
Penis cakes, anyone?
As a hipster (I've got the big glasses, I live in Brooklyn, l'm just calling it like it is), I'm a huge fan of visiting different outdoor food festivals.
Since I'm in my 30s I prefer food festivals to music festivals because there's less of a chance I'll have to wait eight hours in line to pee in a plastic cell inexplicably covered in feces or talk down a stranger losing their mind on 'shrooms.
Also at food festivals, food is present and celebrated, not some sex-addicted guitar player who probably has not bathed in weeks. Always a plus.
That said in all my food festival excursions I have never stumbled across anything as awesome and WTF-worthy as the penis cakes on a stick produced by Yummy Hero at the 626 Night Market in California.
Yes, you heard me: Penis cakes.
These deep fried confections are served on a stick and covered with a squirt of white sugary icing on the tip.
Worried about taking a bite of this bad boy? Fret not, you'll be rewarded with an ooey gooey Nutella center. I cannot even.
I just had lunch and already I'm considering munching down on one of these fried dicks!
I love eating, and I also love spending time with a high quality penis. Combine the two and my goodness such pleasures await.
I may be an East coast girl, but I'm seriously considering hopping a flight to West "for work" so I can glut myself with these sticky sensations.
It's funny to be passionate about your job when your job is literally talking about penis cakes on the internet. Don't think I don't know how lucky I am, because I fully do.
Some folks were a bit shy about eating their penis cakes, others reveled in the opportunity to take a chomp.
The group shots of the penis cakes were my favorite.
There's something about the way they're all gathered together, they look like sleeping baby birds. It's like the morning after a dude-heavy orgy.
If you can't get yourself to CA and still find yourself with a hankering for penis that just won't quit, I got you.
Cake molds in the shapes of penises are SO easy to buy on the internet! With just one discreet shopping session over on Amazon you can be whipping up your very own dicks at home.
Eat up.
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