Taylor Swift Tries Too Hard (And Rips Off Pink) In 'Blank Space'

Taylor Swift isn't quite as self-aware as she thinks she is.


Taylor Swift is a thing that's going to keep happening. She keeps putting stuff out, and people make fun of her, but then a lot more people buy it. I don't know why. I seriously just don't get her appeal. It's not just because I'm not in her demographic, either. I can understand why some people are popular, even if I don't care for them. But Taylor Swift is like the Twilight of popstars. It's really awful while at the same time being super popular, especially among teenagers who have no concept of what healthy relationships, love or dating scenarios are like.

Taylor Swift's new video for the song "Blank Space" is her attempt at cheeky self-awareness about the public's perception of her. "Trying" is the key word here. This video is just full of scenes of Taylor "trying." She tries really hard to be interesting in this video: Some handsome guy comes to visit her in her mansion. They start dating and everything is cute. Then things turn sour and Taylor Swift becomes a lunatic and starts destroying stuff. The guy leaves and then another one comes in, and the cycle starts again.

We get it. Really.

But that doesn't mean it's not wholly self-serving and self-satisfied. First of all, the video starts with a credit that says "A film directed by Joseph Kahn," which is the most pretentious thing ever. No, this isn't a film, this is just a bloated commercial for Taylor Swift's 1989 album and tour. It's clear that they were trying to make it seem like a film, which is why the whole thing is just too much.

The attempts at imagery in the video are as obvious and elementary as Swift's pandering to tweens. Everything in the mansion is white, except for Taylor's dress. First, there's white horses in the room. Then she meets the guy and it shows him walking a bunch of rottweilers. Get it? There's a scene where Taylor holds an apple while singing about how evil men are. Imagery is supposed to subtle and open to interpretation. If everything is going to be this blatant, then why bother with the imagery at all? It would seem less desperate if they just put subtitles on the screen directly saying what the images mean.

Then there's Taylor Swift. Watching her try to act crazy (or just act in general) is just secondhand embarrassing. It isn't charming or cute, it's just awkward and confusing. The part where she beats his car with a golf club just made me feel bad for watching it. (It probably made Elin Nordegren roll her eyes, too.) I know that it's supposed to look crazy, but it just seems desperate for attention. This seems like Taylor's attempt to say "See, I'm more than just a brokenhearted pop star! Look at my range! I'm so edgy!"

Also, was anyone else confused as to why she flipped on this guy in the video? Everything is going fine until she sees him start using his phone while they're on a picnic together. The thing is, he's just sitting there using his phone. He's not being sneaky, she doesn't catch him doing anything sketchy. He just pulls out his phone, and she's like "I get drunk off jealousy." Hey, maybe actually show the guy doing something kind of wrong? Literally, all he does is use his phone. From where Taylor is, she can't even see the screen. For all she knows, he was just updating his Facebook to say how wonderful she is or something. They went overboard with everything else in this video, but this is the part that they get subtle with?

The worst part is that P!nk already made this video. It's called "Please Don't Leave Me," and if you like P!nk, it's a fan favorite — and if you're a Stephen King fan, you'll appreciate the nods to Misery. This is just a bad ripoff of that with a bit of self-referential bits thrown in. All that this proved is that Taylor Swift should stick to making simple videos, because she's just too basic to pull anything else off ... and that she's a bit of a hypocrite for complaining about public speculation on her love life, because no one references the Taylor Swift dating sagas more than Taylor Swift does.