If You Want To Be Instantly Admired, Start Practicing These 9 Simple Power Moves
Simple moves that instantly elevate how others see you.
Kira Severinova | Unsplash There's something undeniably captivating about people who walk into a room and immediately command respect. We've all encountered these individuals who carry themselves with an ease that suggests they're completely comfortable in their own skin.
There are simple shifts in how you carry yourself and connect with others that can transform not just how people see you, but how you see yourself. It's important to remember that true admiration is about creating the kind of genuine connections that make everyone involved feel a little more seen and valued.
If you want to be instantly admired, start practicing these 9 simple power moves:
1. You have emotional control
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If you are quick to react with anger, you lose respect. Avoiding this is to nurture what I call ‘the Gap.’
Reactive people have tiny gaps, meaning they don’t create any space between a triggering stimulus and their emotional response.
Non-reactive people command tremendous respect because they have nurtured gaps wide enough to allow any tension in themselves to dissipate.
2. You care for your appearance
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Look around at the masses. Taking a little extra care for your appearance and your online presence creates a strange aura around you.
Your appearance sends strong signals about how you view yourself. If you take care of yourself, others will want to take care of you.
Research confirms that caring for one's appearance is a powerful factor in how people are perceived and admired by others. This influence is largely explained by the halo effect, where a positive impression in one area, influences a positive overall judgment of a person
3. You hold space
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This is something I learned through my work as a coach. Holding space gives people room to speak their minds without cutting them off or rushing them along.
Most people are too busy trying to come up with clever stuff to say next. People end up sharing all kinds of personal stuff with me because I let them talk, and I allow the conversation to slow down because I demonstrate my comfort in silence. If you rush, they rush, which diminishes the connection between you.
4. You're obsessive — in a good way
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‘Obsession’ conjures an unhealthy image these days. But nothing remarkable was ever created without an ‘unreasonable’ level of focus brought to its creation.
Enjoy many pursuits if you like, but find something to which you can bring relentless energy and attention. The great disease of the modern age is to run from one shiny thing to the next. Be different.
Whether it’s a specific language, an area of history, or even a narrow skill, like knitting beanies, elevate the object of your obsessiveness to the point you turn heads.
While the average person may use 'obsessed' to describe someone with admirable dedication, research draws a clear distinction between unhealthy compulsion and healthy passion. Healthy passion is defined by balance and well-being.
5. You're self-deprecating
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There’s a difference between a doormat who continually complains about how terrible their life is and someone who throws in some humorous self-criticism.
Sporadically putting yourself down in a funny way is highly attractive because it demonstrates the very opposite of insecurity. You are secure in yourself to the degree that you can make fun of yourself. People love this.
6. You're a little mysterious
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Most people can’t wait for the opportunity to tell all about their problems and successes. They love being the center of attention.
Mysterious and thus interesting people are slow to share things about themselves, though they don’t hide entirely. This isn’t about being tight and guarded.
You just aren’t swayed by the need to show off like most are. You are busy letting them talk, which immediately raises your status and intrigue.
Strategically revealing personal information can gradually increase admiration by building trust, creating an impression of selectivity, and stimulating intrigue. A 2017 study explained that rushing intimate disclosure can backfire and diminish admiration, as it may be seen as inappropriate or desperate.
7. You authentically flatter other people
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Overly nice people are a dime a dozen. While most people try desperately to impress, you do it differently. Your compliments are rare, unexpected, specific, and come from a genuine, not fake, place. This makes you unforgettable.
When a compliment is expected, people's mental guards are up, and they are likely to analyze the flatterer's motives. However, a 2022 study explained that an unexpected compliment can catch someone off guard and be perceived as a spontaneous, genuine expression of appreciation.
8. You diffuse situations
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Conversations often get heavy and serious. An interaction is often only ‘serious’ because that is the frame participants have set. There are moments when seriousness is called for.
But often, when you can respond to a somber tone with a humorous one, the tension will dissipate, and people will admire you for your strength. You become a master of light.
According to a 2014 study, people who handle conflict with a calm, empathetic, and solution-oriented approach are often seen as more competent and mature. This approach is respected because it demonstrates an ability to guide interactions toward a positive outcome, preventing unproductive power struggles.
9. You go against the grain
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It takes courage to say what others are thinking but are too afraid to say. It requires tenacity to do anything most refuse to do, whether it’s bringing a relentless consistency to your creative output, your fitness regime, or taking calculated risks.
Most people are determined to fit in, so when you do anything that goes against the grain, people can’t help but admire your ‘far out’ moves.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. He's the author of the Mastery Den newsletter, which helps people triple their productivity.
