11 Things Gen Z Gets Right About Boundaries That Older Generations Never Could
Setting boundaries is an act of self-respect that Gen Zers aren't afraid to indulge.
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock As one of the first generations to grow up in a digital landscape where cellphones, technology, and social media were available all the time, it's not surprising that Gen Z also has more accessibility to knowledge and information about mental health. It's not simply that they're experiencing more mental health concerns — in need of support, resources, and community online to cope — but that they're more aware and willing to express them, compared to older generations that fueled traditional stigmas.
From their personal well-being, to their professional lives, and even the welfare of their personal relationships, this baseline foundation of knowledge about mental health and resources often supports Gen Z to set better boundaries, have more productive conversations, and even regulate their emotions to a higher level. There are certain things Gen Z gets right about boundaries that older generations never could, simply because of the environment they grew up within.
Here are 11 things Gen Z gets right about boundaries that older generations never could
1. You don't have to explain
CarlosBarquero | Shutterstock
Whether it's saying "no" to a social event or simply saying "I don't like that kind of behavior," not falling into pressures to explain their choices is one of the things Gen Z gets right about boundaries that older generations never could. They know that regardless of how the other person responds or what they say, at the end of the day, the boundary is for their own personal well-being.
They know that expressing their boundaries and emotions are important, but when it comes to justifying and over-explaining them, they're not in charge of anyone's reactions but their own.
2. Taking space is a healthy response
Halfpoint | Shutterstock
Asking for space when a conversation isn't productive or deciding to come back to a conflict to unpack emotions is a completely healthy response, and sometimes, it can help to prevent resentment from not feeling understood or seen, according to experts from Couples Therapy Melbourne. Whether it's in an intimate relationship or with a friend, it's one of the things Gen Z gets right about boundaries that older generations could never.
They never feel entitled to someone else's time or space, especially when it's not being offered in a safe space. Instead, they make an effort to prioritize solitude and take a step back, so when they do come back together, everyone feels more safe, grounded, and present.
3. Not everyone deserves a relationship with you
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock
Compared to older generations' traditional expectations of family relationships and "respecting elders," Gen Z knows that not everyone deserves to have access to you in a relationship. Whether it's going "no contact" with a toxic parent or setting clear boundaries at work, they're not afraid to prioritize themselves by stepping away from a relationship that's not adding value to their lives.
Part of the reason why Gen Z tends to report more mental health concerns than other generations, according to an American Psychological Association study, is because they're open and expressive about it.
They may still face societal stigmas around seeking support or talking about their mental health, but they're willing to address and heal, whether that's with clear boundaries, therapy, or other forms of support.
4. It's okay to set work-life boundaries
insta_photos | Shutterstock
According to a Deloitte study, Gen Z workers place a strong emphasis on work-life balance in their professional careers, compared to older generations like baby boomers that prioritize company loyalty and "hustle culture." They're not afraid to set workplace boundaries — from refusing to get drinks with co-workers, to removing work apps from their personal phones, and even staying late for the sake of "company productivity."
They know that it's okay to have a personal life and identity that doesn't completely revolve around their job, especially considering they're not being paid fair wages or given benefits that support their priorities outside of work.
5. Emotional labor can be taxing
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock
Whether it's in the workplace, where studies show that taking on emotional labor can lead to exhaustion, withdrawal, and worsened physical health, or in their personal relationships, one of the things Gen Z gets right about boundaries that older generations never could is that there's more to burnout than simple physical labor or productivity.
When someone is taking the majority of the burden for emotional labor in a relationship — mediating arguments, pushing other people to communicate, and even needing to ask for affection — their mental and physical health suffers.
Despite older generations' tendency to occasionally overlook mental health concerns and conversations about emotional labor or vulnerability, Gen Z isn't afraid to set boundaries and have hard conversations about the kind of emotional labor they're pushed into.
6. Toxic relationships aren't worth mending
Srdjan Randjelovic | Shutterstock
While it's true that Gen Z is experiencing more loneliness and social isolation than many older generations, largely due to social media, financial struggles, a lack of "third places," and mental health concerns, they still prefer to prioritize alone time over toxic relationships. They don't feel any kind of innate obligation to maintain relationships that no longer serve them, whether it's their parents, a long-time friend, or even a co-worker.
They know that toxic relationships aren't always worth mending, and sometimes, spending time alone is healthier than investing effort and energy into someone who doesn't deserve access to them.
7. Going 'no contact' can be healthy
insta_photos | Shutterstock
"No contact" expectations — cutting off a relationship and refusing to maintain communication — is becoming one of the most common forms of parental estrangement and managing toxic family relationships, especially for Gen Zers and millennials today. They know that despite history, family ties, or bloodlines, they're not obligated to invest energy into relationships and people that sabotage their well-being and mental health.
Considering Gen Z is more adamant about safeguarding their mental health than many other generations, with new boundaries, values, and work-life expectations, it's not surprising that it's one of the things they get right about boundaries that older generations could never.
8. It's okay to correct people
Chay_Tee | Shutterstock
Whether it's an identity boundary, like expecting to be called the right pronouns, or a more relational one, like tolerating certain language or behaviors, Gen Zers know that it's alright to correct people, even if it's a little uncomfortable at first.
Even though they're occasionally labeled "ignorant" or "selfish" for calling people out and asserting their boundaries, studies from Pew Research Center argue that they're on track to become the most well-educated generation yet — especially when it comes to mental health, emotional intelligence, and communication.
It's one of the things Gen Z gets right about boundaries that older generations never could, because they know that protecting your well-being and health means self-advocating, even when nobody else will.
9. 'No' is a complete sentence
viDi Studio | Shutterstock
Especially for women, who have been socialized into agreeable and submissive identities, it's important to challenge the notion that they're expected to set their own needs aside to protect other people's comfort or success. It's okay to set boundaries, prioritize yourself, and even make other people feel a bit uncomfortable in the name of self-respect.
"No" is a complete sentence. For example, saying "no" to someone's invitation or "no" to tolerating emotional manipulation in a relationship is a form of empowerment that nobody can take away from you. You don't have to justify that decision or over-explain why you made a choice to anyone.
10. You're allowed to change your mind
insta_photos | Shutterstock
Even though many older generations operate from a place of "right and wrong" or "black and white" when it comes to making life choices, following a certain path, or expressing their expectations, it's actually okay — healthy, even — to change your mind.
Whether you're changing expectations in a relationship, restructuring a boundary at work, or openly communicating a different opinion to a friend on a worldly topic, it's normal and perfectly acceptable to change your mind. Even though many people find comfort in believing a misguided truth that we live in a straightforward world, we certainly don't.
It's not just human nature to change your mind, it's representative of your character. You're willing to admit when you're wrong, talk about things you don't yet understand, and even have hard conversations where active listening results in a change of opinion — all of which aren't easy to do.
11. Setting boundaries isn't selfish
Cast Of Thousands | Shutterstock
Setting boundaries is an important act of self-love, self-care and, most importantly, self-respect. According to psychotherapist Emily Roberts, setting boundaries helps you to connect with yourself. You have to reflect on what you want and need before you set a boundary, but you're also being an advocate for yourself by verbally expressing those needs.
Even if other people are uncomfortable or insecure with your confidence in setting boundaries, or even a little defensive in the face of their toxic behavior, that doesn't take away from the fact that boundaries are a form of respect.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
