People Who Actually Enjoy Life Usually Keep These 9 Phrases Out Of Their Vocabulary
Davide De Giovanni | Pexels Trying to be happy all the time only makes us more unhappy. But some deliberate choices help us enjoy our lives more.
Our quality of life is almost entirely in our control. And even in small ways, people who actually enjoy life usually keep certain phrases out of their vocabulary. It's a seemingly small shift, but it makes all the difference.
Phrases people never say when they actually enjoy life
1. 'Why is this happening to me?'
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If you constantly ask a question like this, you're giving your power away. Only someone trying to avoid accountability for the direction of their own life will blame everyone else for their misfortunes. They may even waste their energy and time groveling over why they were dealt a bad hand instead of figuring out how to make the best of it.
Ironically, people who actually feel sorry for themselves don't need to say these kinds of phrases. The people using this language are just being harsh on themselves. It's really no wonder they don't enjoy their lives because they're constantly bashing themselves for making mistakes.
2. 'I have to do this'
It's a small shift from "I have to do this" to "I get to do this," but it can make all the difference.
We sometimes overlook the small joys and privileges we have every day in favor of complaining about our responsibilities. Even the most time-consuming tasks and annoying chores can be to feel grateful for with the right mindset.
3. 'I have the worst luck'
Entitled people are more likely to believe in bad luck and to name their own misfortunes as a symptom of bad luck, according to a 2021 study. Instead of taking control of their life direction, they pity themselves and blame everyone and everything else.
While it might seem like a small experience, learning from mistakes and growing from them is what makes us secure enough to really enjoy our lives. So, someone actively avoiding growth is less satisfied.
4. 'That's how the world works'
When we become passive in our lives, it's impossible to enjoy anything. By avoiding discomfort that helps us grow and even using phrases like "that's just how the world works" to justify laziness, it leaves us in a stagnant cycle of dissatisfaction.
You don't have to advocate for everything or be constantly moving to be happy. But people who enjoy their lives make an effort to change things that are no longer working for them. They find purpose in making the world or their communities a better place.
5. 'Once I achieve that, I'll be happy'
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Many people waste their one precious life spending all their time chasing things they believe will make them happy. Those things look different from person to person, like money or a relationship, but the outcome is the same: dissatisfaction.
If your happiness is contingent on an external something, especially something you're chasing with the goal of being a solution to everything you're struggling with, chances are you're setting yourself up to fail.
6. 'I wish I was more like them'
Social comparison is the bane of our existence. Sometimes it can be healthy, motivating us and boosting our self-esteem, but most of the time, it only leads to more negative self-talk and chips away at our sense of personal fulfillment.
People who enjoy their lives are mindful and focus on what feels good for them, instead of hyperfocusing on everyone else's life.
7. 'I don't have time to help'
Helping other people makes us happier overall. Even though it can sometimes be difficult to ask for help, everyone benefits from receiving and offering their support.
Even in conversations with strangers that most people underestimate, offering support can give us a sense of meaning in the most ordinary situations. That's why people who enjoy their lives and find joy in the small moments never turn down an opportunity to help someone else, unless they actively have to protect their boundaries or health.
8. 'I deserve that'
Life is not a prize for the most deserving. Our world is an unfair, sometimes cruel place. Clinging to resentment and despair over not getting something just because you deem yourself deserving of it is a recipe for unhappiness.
But happy people who love their lives and feel secure in them are careful about holding jealousy for others who achieve things they want. They know that someone else's achievements don't dispute or sabotage their own, even when it might feel like it.
9. 'I can never catch a break'
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Chronic complainers always find something to vent about. They harbor a kind of negativity that never goes away, and then spread it to everyone in their lives without fail.
Instead of feeling optimistic in a way that helps them feel better, they cling to their negativity and self-pity. They can "never catch a break" and always "have the worst luck," but never do anything to change it.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
