People Who Prefer To Travel Alone Often Share These 5 Traits Without Realizing
For solo travelers, a trip isn't just for fun. It's for transformation.
martin-dm | Getty Images Signature | Canva Pro When we think of travel and vacations, for most of us, the first image we conjure is ourselves with our best friend, partner, or family lying together on a beach or strolling through a museum. Traveling communally is pretty much the default, and oftentimes, the very notion of going on a trip alone makes people actually fearful, not just because of safety concerns but because of worries about loneliness.
"I could never do that" is a familiar phrase to any solo traveler who tells their friends or family about their plans, but ask pretty much anyone who's done it and they'll tell you that traveling alone is one of the most cathartic experiences you can have, and experts have identified a few reasons why.
Solo travelers tend to share 5 traits, according to psychologists:
First, let's establish that traveling and vacationing are pretty much two different things. The former is about getting away from it all, packing in as much leisure or activity as possible in the time allotted, whether it's a beach or a theme park. Traveling, on the other hand, is more about experiencing a place's scenery, culture, history, or all of the above. It's a different ball of wax than lying on a beach with a drink in your hand. Both have their benefits, but they serve very different purposes.
And when it comes to travel, it seems to mean different things to those who fly solo. Recently, women's wellness coach Mya McCarthy had a thought-provoking take on solo travelers. "I truly don't think I have ever met someone while travelling that was not … the black sheep of their family or community."
She went on to explain that people with a passion for travel, and especially those who fly solo, tend to be "running" from something, not in the unhealthy sense the word usually conjures, but "running from what they've known because they believe and they know that there's more out there."
As a dyed-in-the-wool solo traveler myself, I was struck by this take because it is essentially the words I've been searching for. I am the black sheep of my family and community, and that is indeed exactly why I've sought out travel—to better understand myself, and the people and places I come from.
McCarthy went on to say that travelers "don't feel any restrictions to stay the same," and I couldn't have said it better myself. And it turns out, there's something to this take. Psychologists say that jetting off solo is almost always about not just exploring a new location, but exploring oneself. Here are five traits that solo travelers tend to share that make exploring alone cathartic.
1. They want control over their trip
At first blush, this sounds a bit too controlling to fit into this very philosophical view of travel, but it's less about a Type A need to rule every detail with an iron fist and more about ensuring they get out of the trip what they're looking for, which is more about personal growth than notching another passport stamp.
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If you've ever traveled with someone whose approach was misaligned with yours, you know how much it can disrupt the experience. I'm a person who likes to amble and wander and see where the day takes me; one of my best friends gets antsy if there's more than 15 minutes of downtime and likes to go, go, go. We've just agreed to never travel together, lest one of us not make it home alive!
2. They tend to be more reflective and value solitude
A 2021 study found that one of the key motivators for solo travelers was a thirst for self-reflection and self-discovery. It's hard to build that into an itinerary when you're traveling with others, and it's not easy to get solitude, which many solo travelers crave.
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For many people, especially those who are more introverted and many who are neurodivergent, solitude is how they recharge. I'm one of these people myself, and while traveling with others is fun in other ways, it always leaves me just a tiny bit disappointed I wasn't able to have that alone time, just me and the city or hiking trail or whatever the case may be, experiencing it one-on-one.
3. A desire for transformation and personal growth
For solo travelers, a trip is often about something even deeper than connecting with yourself. It can feel like a form of recovery, and scientists say this impact is in fact very real. Psychologist and avid traveler Dr. Jenna Kirtley has written that studies have shown that travel helps lower stress, increase emotional well-being, and can even aid in recovery from depression.
Call it the "Eat, Pray, Love" effect, and I've experienced it myself. When I took a solo trip to Paris shortly after a catastrophic trauma in my life, it helped me round a corner that three years of therapy hadn't quite done the trick on.
Not that the therapy didn't help. It saved my life, in fact. But there was something almost confrontational about the way that trip made me realize that while I had been drowning in darkness, the world had kept right on spinning, and there was still wonder and awe to be had. It spun my life in a different direction that I'm not sure would have been possible otherwise.
4. A love of freedom and flexibility
This all goes back to what McCarthy said: When traveling solo, you can wander, explore, and experience with no rules, no schedules, and nobody else's needs to take into account, and that's often how you're able to get to those "black sheep" moments of no longer being the same.
In my experience, the best travel moments I've had were just things I stumbled upon, like a random Roman amphitheater in the middle of Paris, a tiny cafe in the literal middle of nowhere along a hiking trail in England, and a panel of ancient petroglyphs on a rock in Utah.
The kinds of things you're likely to miss if you're chatting with a travel partner or trying to get to the next place on an itinerary. Traveling solo keeps you engaged in the present and gives you the latitude to stop and bask in it for as long as you like.
5. A desire to meet new people and try new things.
One of the key ways traveling solo broadens your horizons is that you tend to encounter people you otherwise wouldn't. Even if you're an introvert like I am, you'll find people engaging you, either because they're traveling solo too, or because they're intrigued by you doing so and want to hear all about it.
I'm a shy sort, but even I have had this experience again and again: Hearing the life story of a grizzled Waffle House waitress over the five different kinds of grits she brought me when I said I'd never tried them; a huge campfire breakfast in the Sierras with a Wisconsin family of six who noticed me camping alone; a midnight swim in the Colorado River with a group of hilarious drunk girls from Georgia whose hammock I helped fix; even a random restaurant encounter in France that briefly turned into a VERY long-distance relationship (that reputation for romance they have is not just a stereotype).
Planning and itineraries have their place, and flying solo by the seat of the pants definitely isn't for everyone. But if it's something transformative you're after, a trip by yourself is the quickest ticket to something new and cathartic. And that's the best souvenir there is.
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
