10 Common Body Aches & What They Tell You About Your Relationship

Feeling achy? Your relationship might be the problem.

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Emotional and mental stress can tax our physical body and jeopardize our overall wellness, and often we feel this in our joints. That's because there is a connection between our joint health and the vitality of our relationships.

A very long time ago, I fractured my left clavicle in a mountain bike race. The pieces of my bone did not return to an easy fit. This is not a problem unless I am backpacking or trying to sleep on my left side. Lately, I have noticed my left shoulder hurting and pulled forward a little. Sometimes, I think it is my body’s way of creating a little shelter of protection for my heart. Our bodies respond in amazing ways to what our hearts and minds are feeling.


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The powerful connection between the body's joints and relationships

A joint allows two or more bones to work together to move the human body.

Think of any skeletal movement in your body, and you find at least one joint involved. Joints are essentially the place where bones join to allow change. When I think of a body being aligned, it reminds me of how dolphins swim seemingly effortlessly through the water. They have great momentum, strength, and grace. These are the qualities of physical alignment

A relationship is a connection between two or more people, places, or things.

This joining together offers the potential of shifting energies between all parties involved. We have relationships with everything in our world, including ourselves. When our relationships are aligned with love and high vibrational energy, there is a beautiful symbiotic exchange of energies. This is beneficial for all parties involved.


Think about a loving relationship you are experiencing. There are often twists and turns along the path, but your life is enhanced by relationships and experiences. The potential for self-awareness is one of the benefits of all relationships.

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Physical alignment and alignment in relationships.

Just as our physical body has a space where two body parts meet, our life has an invisible energetic juncture between all relationships. This can be filled with easy, flowing emotions or difficult, painful, low vibrational emotions. 

woman on chair has knee painPhoto: ShotPrime Studio via Shutterstock


The motions joints allow in our body are often where energy can get stuck. For example, if you are emotionally done moving in a perpetual forward motion, your knees may begin bothering you. This might be a sign to rest and ponder a different life path because your mental stress has affected the alignment of one of the critical joints for walking and moving forward.



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What each of the body's joints are trying to tell us about our relationships: 


The physical joints in our body may have a medical diagnosis, but there is also an emotional cause of the discomfort. I encourage you to have fun exploring how best to care for your body and relationships on an energetic level.


The joints in our fingers help us pick up all the nuances of a relationship. This is where the connections come together, think of walking hand in hand. This can be work, family, or a romantic relationship. If you are suffering discomfort in your fingers, do a quick check to see what relationships are suffering in the area of connection.


Our wrists allow us to rotate our hands in a way to receive. Our wrists also help us to show gratitude with prayer hands. If you are experiencing discomfort in your wrists, check in and evaluate your gratitude and ability to receive in your relationships.


Our elbows are a powerhouse for cutting through the distractions of life or untruths in relationships. If your elbows are bothering you, examine all your relationships and see where you need to stand up for yourself and get the answers you want.



Our necks can hold the energy of where you gave your power away by saying yes to something you did not want to. They are also a reminder to look at all sides of your relationships.


Our shoulders often take on the responsibility of supporting others, but another beautiful aspect of our shoulders is helping us reach up to higher vibrational plains. If you are suffering from shoulder pain, check and see if you carry too much responsibility in a relationship. Also, notice if it is time for a major transformation into higher vibrational living.


Our spine keeps us aligned with our purpose and best life. If you are experiencing discomfort, notice what you are aligned with within your relationships. Perhaps some of your relationships are taking you off your best path.


Our hips can hold a lot of energy. If you are suffering from hip pain, notice if there is any trauma or unresolved grief or anger in past relationships.



Knees offer forward movement. If this is uncomfortable, notice if there is anything in your life that you no longer want to be part of. Take a breather, and maybe there is another way of moving forward.


Ankles are a powerful opportunity for changing directions. If your ankles are aching, notice if you are uncomfortable changing direction in your relationships.


Our toe joints are powerful in helping us stay balanced in all the little areas in our life. If your toes are achy, what relationship has gotten out of balance?



Improving alignment in body and relationships

Drinking water, eating healthy food, and receiving full bodywork can help keep your joints moving. Yoga and Pilates are great ways to keep your physical joints flexible and strong. This can be as gentle as chair yoga, or as difficult as heated yoga with weights. You get to choose what feels good to your body.


Keeping our emotional and spiritual joints healthy can be done with a few mindful practices. First, determine if any relationships need to be retired. Next, determine what relationships need a little more ease and grace. Imagine the space between you and the other party expanding and filling with healing light. Visualize smoothing away the rough edges and see how all the moving parts are clean and uncomplicated. Practice this imagery every day, followed by gratitude for all the support and love in your life.



If you are suffering from serious joint pain or emotional wellness issues, please reach out to a professional and receive the loving care you deserve. The holistic approach of using traditional and nontraditional modalities is a beautiful way to thrive:)


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Polly Wirum is a spiritual coach and psychic. She teaches clients how to discover their truth through psychic readings, astrological readings, and intuitive life coaching. She offers guided meditation and, in some cases, guided exploration of past lives.