The Kindest People Share These 7 Resilient Qualities, According To Psychology
Their warmth isn't weakness.

I feel like kindness is in short supply these days. The world seems to be a bit off its axis. We feel divided and disconnected, and it’s disappointing because you and I both know that humans are better than that.
People say if you don’t care, then you’ll never get hurt, or if you hold no expectations for others, you’ll never be disappointed. While in theory, these statements are true, they don’t take into account one very important piece of the puzzle: We are all human, and we all have wants, needs, and emotions. A 2023 study on self-esteem suggested that ignoring our very inner core is a weakness.
Do not let the harsh world rob you of your emotions. Do not let the cruelty of another deprive you of the deep love you can feel within yourself. We are all humans, and we can all thrive in this life together if only we would be a little kinder to each other.
The kindest people share these resilient qualities, according to psychology:
1. They put themselves out there
Jacob Lund / Shutterstock
Anyone who has ever admitted their feelings or revealed a secret understands that it’s not an easy task. The emotional fortitude it takes to reveal your innermost self to another human is a special kind of strength reserved for those with the strongest of spirits.
2. They have the willingness to help others
Jacob Lund / Shutterstock
Strength is not only about what you can do for yourself, but what you can give to others. Kindhearted people have more willingness to help others.
This gives them an added layer of power and strength over those who act selfishly. Kind people are the ones who can make a difference in the world.
Studies show that resilient individuals tend to have a greater capacity for compassion and empathy, which can lead them to be more inclined to help others. They are also more likely to be able to maintain strong relationships, which are crucial for providing support and resources in times of need.
3. They have built up their resilience
Josep Suria / Shutterstock
When you lift weights, you physically break down the muscle. The amazing thing is that as the muscle repairs itself, it grows back bigger and stronger than before, but the “damage” needs to happen first.
The same happens to your heart — not literally, but metaphorically. The more challenges you face, the more resilient you become.
Remember point number one: kind people put themselves out there. This means they have a higher chance of getting hurt, but in the long run, they end up smarter, wiser, and stronger because of the experience.
4. They have control over their own emotions
ViDI Studio / Shutterstock
Kindhearted people have the tolerance and patience necessary to remain cool, calm, and collected under difficult circumstances. This could be when dealing with a difficult customer or an argumentative partner. Anyone who has ever needed to keep their emotions under control knows it takes inner strength and kindness to get through it.
Effective emotional regulation allows resilient individuals to stay calm under stress, focus on solutions, and avoid being overwhelmed by negative emotions. One study suggests that individuals who are skilled at regulating their own emotions may also be better at helping others regulate their emotions.
5. They develop themselves further
Jacob Lund / Shutterstock
If we aim to have self-awareness, what we love or don’t love about another person will open our eyes to what we love or don’t love about ourselves. If we shut ourselves off to the world, we only allow stimuli into our lives that we choose.
This makes our personal growth process look like walking down a narrow hallway instead of walking into an open field of possibilities. If we open our minds to others we never know what we may learn.
6. They're interested in new perspectives on the world
Anton Vierietin / Shutterstock
One of the things that makes life so interesting is the vast diversity of people on our planet. Each one of us has a unique background, upbringing, thought process, and outlook. What an amazing opportunity it is to tap into any mind on the planet simply by having a conversation.
Without this curiosity, we only spend time with those who are just like us. Kind people seek out new perspectives and use them to develop into a well-rounded person.
A 2011 study found that resilient individuals tend to believe that they have control over their own lives and can influence their outcomes. They don't blame external factors for their problems but actively seek solutions and take responsibility for their actions.
7. They find more happiness in the long run
Yuri A / Shutterstock
Emotional connections with others make us more fulfilled and help us lead more complete lives. Shutting out these opportunities eliminates the risk of being hurt, but also eliminates the possibility of finding happiness.
James Michael Sama is an internationally recognized speaker, author, and personal development coach. He has become a go-to expert with outlets such as CNN, Bravo, The New York Post, The Huffington Post, The Daily Beast, CNBC, The Boston Globe, CBS, and more.