It's Time To Immediately End A Relationship With Someone If You Feel These 9 Things In Your Body
Hellame | Shutterstock We often think about illness, unhealthy relationships, bad luck, and mental health from a cerebral place, but our bodies feel their burdens before we consciously notice them.
From holding onto stress and anxiety to showing symptoms of hidden diseases we don't know about yet, there's a lot we can learn from connecting to our physical selves. Our gut instincts and feelings can also alert us to when it's time to immediately end a relationship with someone, especially if you feel certain things in your body. It might feel a bit otherworldly for most people who overthink everything, but don't ignore these warning signs. Your body often knows better before your mind.
It's time to immediately end a relationship with someone if you feel these 9 things in your body
1. You're anxious before spending time together
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Even though we've glamorized the concept of "butterflies" while dating or being nervous before spending time with someone we're dating, if you're constantly feeling an inescapable kind of anxiousness in an established relationship before spending time together, that should be a red flag. Safety and security define healthy long-term connections, not "chemistry" or lustful feelings that make us feel uncertain and unsafe.
Listen to your body. Where does it feel most tense? Where do you tend to adopt a lot of nervousness? Who spikes your anxiety when they're in the same room? These aren't inconsequential reminders of a crush. They're warning signs, and your intuition is trying to tell you something is wrong.
2. Sudden illnesses flare up
Relationship stress and red flags often show up in our bodies before they arise in our awareness, at least according to clinical psychologist Dr. Christie Ferrari. It's true that the "body keeps the score" well before our minds can piece together patterns of behavior or negative energy.
So, if it feels like you're always getting sick after spending time with someone, noticing flare-ups with chronic issues, or feeling drained when they're around, those could all be signs that the relationship needs to end. Even if they're not literally making you sick, their bad energy and manipulation under the surface could be draining you consistently at your expense.
3. Your stomach drops when you see them
The mind-body connection often starts in the gut. In fact, our guts send our brains more information than the other way around, making them more influential to our mood than we realize, according to neurologist Richard E. Cytowic. That's why we often get a "pit in our stomach" or nervous butterflies around certain people or in certain situations. It's a stress response, telling our brain that there's something wrong or to be afraid of.
While some of these reactions are our own anxious beliefs and thoughts, most of the time, these gut feelings are warning signs that we need to change something. So, if you're always feeling your stomach drop when someone is around or when you see your partner, that's a huge red flag that it's time to end a relationship with someone.
4. You're always tired and fatigued
The people we keep around us inherently influence our energy, both for better and for worse. Even someone's negative attitude can become our problem, considering emotions are contagious to everyone in their vicinity.
Think about how you feel after spending time with your best friend. Chances are, when they leave, you're smiling, weightless, and motivated. Now, think about interacting with a boss you hate at work and heading home. You're agitated and drained, even though you spent the same amount of time with both people.
So, if you're in a relationship where feeling drained, exhausted, and tired all the time is your new norm, it's essential you take a step back. Give the relationship some space, spend some time alone, and invest in people who make you feel good. Even if you've been together for a long time, there's no reason to tolerate someone who makes you feel like half of a real person.
5. Your chest feels tight
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Even though it feels like an emotion we only experience emotionally or "in our head," a study from the Journal of the American Heart Association actually found that anger negatively impacts our heart and blood vessel health. When we're always angry, that tightness in our chest and the feeling of restlessness we can't shake may be harming our overall health.
So, if someone is the sole cause of this tension and anger, it might be time to move on, for your emotional and physical sake. Don't ignore these physical feelings, because they almost always come to light with emotional realizations down the road.
6. Your skin is itchy
While we can sometimes chalk itchy skin up to dryness, environmental factors, or certain products we use, when we're always itchy before, during or after spending time with our partner, it can point to deeper problems. As research published in Translational Psychiatry found, people experiencing anxiety and depression can often have burning or itchy skin.
It might not seem like a big deal to have this common problem, but when it coincides with being around a partner, your body isn't lying to you. In fact, it's warning you that you probably aren't with the right person.
7. You start having more acne breakouts
Following your intuition and noticing physical red flags is all dependent on self-trust. You have to know and understand yourself to piece together symptoms that are atypical, especially if you're already experiencing stomach issues, acne, or anxiety. However, if you rarely get acne, and your face and body start to flare up after starting a relationship or being around someone for a long period of time, that's a red flag.
Whether it's your body's way of coping with stress or a physical response to bad energy, in more spiritual terms, it's a red flag that's impossible to ignore. Every morning, you have to look in the mirror. Stop ignoring it. You're beautiful with or without acne, but if someone else is causing your body to feel dysregulated and out of whack, you're not taking care of yourself by keeping them around.
8. Your heart beats super fast all the time
While it might seem insane to think about, a study from the Annals of Behavioral Medicine suggests that feelings in a relationship and elements of closeness can actually impact our heart rate, even when we're not physically together with a partner. Especially when we're feeling stressed and disconnected in a relationship, living in a state of survival or nervousness isn't uncommon.
However, even noticing that your heart is beating super fast and you're feeling somewhat restless in the same room as someone should be a red flag. It could be your body's way of reminding you that their intentions are bad or that we're not safe around them, even if everything is seemingly normal on the surface.
9. You can't sleep around them
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Couples who go to bed at the same time and follow similar routines at the end of the day together are often more satisfied and happy, at least according to a study from the Journal of Sleep Research. However, if your body is living in fight or flight mode, trying to mediate stress and red flag feelings from your gut, it's not going to relax you in a bad person's presence.
It's going to be on the defensive at all times, prompting insomnia, middle-of-the-night wakeups, and all kinds of exhaustive symptoms that you can't ignore. Your person should feel safe, especially in romantic relationships, so notice how your body responds when they're around. Do you feel safe? Can you relax?
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
