Men Who Use A Deeper Voice When Talking To Guy Friends Usually Have 11 Specific Personality Traits
Monkey Business Images | Shutterstock Even though we tend to view it through a superficial lens, a study from Psychological Science argues that changes in pitch when talking to someone can alter the way we’re perceived in real ways. For men and women, lowering their pitch often signals attractiveness, while all male conversations offer prestige and status when voices are lowered.
Men who use a deeper voice when talking to guy friends usually have specific personality traits, outside of wanting to be desired or important. There are deeper emotional states and needs that they’re subconsciously meeting by using this behavior, even when they don’t realize it.
Men who use a deeper voice when talking to guy friends usually have 11 specific personality traits
1. They mirror people’s energy often
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According to professor and licensed counselor Suzanne Degges-White, many people tend to mirror the body language and tone of their friends and partners to build trust and rapport. When we feel seen, and the person we’re speaking to feels familiar, even if they’re technically “performing” by mimicking us, we feel safe.
So, it’s often socially observant men who have the power to mirror people’s energy back to them, even if that just means speaking in a deeper voice to feel more secure and confident.
2. They’re practicing confidence
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Someone’s expressed confidence is often noticed first through their tone of voice and intonation, according to a study from Speech Communication. So, if someone has a calm demeanor and a lower tone of voice, they tend to be more positively perceived and confidently admired.
For men seeking closeness and respect from male friends in their lives, these shifts may happen naturally, before they have a chance to connect more vulnerably.
3. They’re attuned to social norms and structures
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Whether it’s noticing someone's dominating energy in a group dynamic or noticing how social norms work in their favor when shifting someone’s perception of them, men who easily change their tone of voice or body language depending on the environment understand social structures. They know how to work the hierarchy in their favor, even with small shifts like using a deeper voice.
Even if the right friends and people would respect them regardless of how their voice sounded, sometimes, with first impressions where everyone is trying on social norms for size, it’s the perfect doorway to make a connection.
4. They adapt quickly to their environment
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With a kind of social awareness to read the room around them and observant traits that allow them to pick up on other people’s energy, men who shift their voice know how to adapt to their environment. Whether they’re with guy friends they want to impress or in the workplace speaking at a meeting, shifting their tone of voice shapes how people perceive them.
While those social perceptions may differ between men and women, according to a study from Psychological Science, a deeper tone of voice usually helps men to be more easily respected.
5. They demand respect
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According to language therapist Judith Weinman, lowering your voice and keeping a calm demeanor in tense situations often allows people to perceive you with more respect. You come across more confidently and command the room with a sense of calmness that most people are missing in their own minds.
Especially when they’re around guy friends or in a group of men they want to impress, men may demand respect with a lower tone of voice, even if it’s entirely subconscious.
6. They find meaning in masculine norms
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While many rigid masculinity norms harm men’s mental health and well-being in the long run, like any other vices or misguided coping mechanisms, they can provide a lot of comfort in the moment.
While lowering their tone of voice in conversations to seem stronger or more important may be the least harmful of those norms, they’re often used by the same men who find meaning in other ones.
7. They’re calm amid discomfort
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Men who know how to regulate their emotions to stay calm and grounded in stressful or emotional situations have the upper hand. They don’t get immediately defensive when something goes wrong, pushing people away and ignoring the feedback they need to grow, whether it’s at home or in the workplace.
Especially considering men typically regulate their emotions through actions and behaviors, according to the Centre for Male Psychology, it’s not surprising that small things like lowering their voice or shifting their body language help them to stay calm in moments of discomfort or chaos.
8. They know how to guide conversations
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As social anxiety continues to rise, being comfortable and confident in social interactions becomes more of a superpower. Not only do socially aware men, who know how to show up and guide conversations, feel less isolated, but they also protect their self-image in places like the workplace.
Even if guiding conversations toward a more productive place means trying on social behaviors like lowering their voice or mirroring body language, it’s these people who know how to get what they want from any interaction.
9. They’re trying to get someone’s attention
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According to a 2018 study, men tend to lower their general tone of voice in the presence of women they find attractive or notice they are are widely desired by other men. Even if it’s entirely subconscious, there’s a part of their mind that clings to traditional masculinity norms to seem more likable or to get someone’s attention.
While most humans have an innate desire for status and superiority, even if it’s a somewhat subconscious need, men in our modern society often feel it more often at the hands of patriarchal ideas of masculinity. They need to be desired and to feel important, which is why certain subtle behaviors like lowering their voice and puffing up their chests are collectively adopted.
10. They want to feel strong
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While true strength in men, especially in our culture, tends to come from openness and vulnerability, many men following traditional standards of masculinity lower their voice to feel socially strong. They need to feel a sense of nonchalance and importance to feel seen in the way they desire, even if it means sacrificing the honest connections that come from a different set of behaviors.
Of course, most women don’t actually care about status or restrictive masculinity when it comes to their male partners. They want the opposite. Someone who is in touch with their emotions and mature enough to be vulnerable, even when it’s hard. That’s where real strength comes from.
11. They want to be taken seriously
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People who have lower voices tend to be perceived as more competent and trustworthy than others, according to a study from Perception. While that might be tied up in unhealthy social norms and patriarchal issues centering on men, it’s still ingrained in the way most people move about the world.
If they want to be taken seriously in a culture dominated by these norms, it can feel easier to conform and adopt them than to challenge and push back.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
