Men Who Are Nice To Everyone But The Woman In Their Life Usually Have These 11 Low-Quality Habits
Nadino / Shutterstock We’ve all met that charismatic guy. Everything he says and does is so charming. When he’s out in public, everyone gravitates to him. He’s so nice and easy to talk to. Unfortunately, when it comes to men who are nice to everyone, that kindness may not extend to the woman in their lives.
In the public eye, he acts one way, but at home, it’s another story. He may constantly complain and accuse her of not doing enough for him. The house is never clean enough, and dinner is never ready on time. He could be disrespectful to her, constantly putting her down. Whatever it may be, he does not treat his partner as well as he treats other people. When a man has this personality trait, he likely has some low-quality habits to go along with it.
Men who are nice to everyone but the woman in their life usually have these 11 low-quality habits
1. They dismiss her feelings
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When a man is kind to everyone in his life but doesn’t show that same respect to the woman in his life, he will likely dismiss her feelings. Some men feel threatened by emotions. If he feels threatened by the concerns she brings to him, he may withdraw from her. Instead of supporting her, he backs away. He might not have the capacity to be there for her.
When around other people, he’s likely viewed as the nice guy. However, behind closed doors, he is far from supportive of the woman he is with. It’s a low-quality habit that can be frustrating to deal with.
2. They never compliment her
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If you know a guy who is kind to everyone, you’ll likely expect him to be nice to his partner. This person has probably complimented you at some point. It could be as simple as saying he liked your shoes. You’ll notice that he is especially friendly with other people. Unfortunately, he may not be that way at home with the woman in his life.
Clinical Psychologist Andy Hahn told Women’s Health Magazine that compliments play a major role in a marriage. They are especially important when one partner needs reassurance. If he has the bad habit of failing to compliment his partner, he likely isn’t easy to be with.
3. They expect her to do everything for them
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Have you heard of weaponized incompetence? It’s the idea that men will pretend not to know how to do something to convince others to do it for them. They will wiggle their way out of their responsibilities. It can happen at work, but is most prevalent in romantic relationships. A man who seems nice to everyone but the woman in his life is likely to have this habit.
“Over time, effects of weaponized incompetence can erode a relationship. Repeated instances of manipulation and avoidance can weaken the bond between you and your partner, leading to increased frustration, dissatisfaction, and, ultimately, deterioration,” says Sanjana Gupta for Verywell Mind.
4. They never take responsibility for their actions
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Some men can be overly friendly with other people. They’re popular. Whether that’s with their friends or other women is a different story. When a man like this is in a social situation, he is thriving. However, he may do things that his partner doesn’t agree with. When he does this, he often takes no responsibility for his actions. Instead, he’ll make excuses.
If he is nice to everyone, the woman in his life, he may have a hard time owning up to his bad behavior with her. This may be due to a fragile ego. He refuses to apologize because he doesn’t believe he did anything wrong. His friends likely have no complaints about him, so when he comes home, he acts like he did no wrong.
5. They disrespect her often
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When a man like this is around other people, he may be the life of the party. He’s funny and charismatic. He is always respectful and kind. However, when he returns home to the woman in his life, he may be the opposite. He may be disrespectful to her.
If someone refuses to respect the woman in his life, he usually makes her feel inadequate. She never does enough in his eyes. He may have a short temper with her. He has no patience for her. This can take the form of yelling at her and treating her as if she's there for him, not as his own person.
6. They prioritize their friends over her
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Since a guy like this has an image to maintain among his friends, he may choose to spend more time with them than with the woman in his life. He is kind and respectful to them. More often than not, he enjoys his time with them. At the end of a long day, he may prefer to spend his time with the guys watching sports or going out. This can hurt a woman’s feelings.
Many men struggle to maintain friendships. They often would rather spend time with the woman in their lives. They may rely on romantic relationships for all of their support and socialization. However, if a guy is far from kind to the woman in his life, he may choose his friends over her. Possibly, they give him more attention than she does, which is what he is seeking.
7. They avoid spending time with her
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In a relationship, women may expect their loved ones to spend time with them. Not always big, elaborate dates, those, though, help. Sometimes, just watching TV on the couch at the end of a long day is enough. When a man struggles to spend quality time with the woman in his life, he makes her feel unimportant. Dates and outings make a difference in a relationship. Instead of prioritizing her, he may put others first. This shows that he is nicer to others than he is to her.
Psychology shows that date nights are more than just a luxury. They are essential for maintaining a strong bond. If a man fails to spend quality time with the woman in his life, he may struggle to be kind to her. It shows in this low-quality habit.
8. They become passive-aggressive
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Kind words come naturally when he’s around other people. At work, he likely approaches projects with others easily. He seems to get along with everyone. There is something about him that reels people in. However, at home, he may struggle to be kind to the woman in his life. He might find that his behavior, whether intentional or not, comes off as passive-aggressive.
“Passive-aggressive men are often (but not always) distinguished by the fact that they are expected to fulfill the supposedly traditional roles of males (i.e. powerful, successful, independent, aggressive, in control) on the one hand, but unable or unwilling to do so in relation to strong social systems in their lives (i.e. parent, partner, work) on the other,” says Preston Ni M.S.B.A. “Inhibited to express themselves fully and yet needing to validate perceived male gender expectations, some men resort to passive-aggressiveness in an attempt to gain power and control.”
9. They rarely show affection
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Someone who is kind to everyone else in his life but not his partner may be emotionally unavailable. To others, he has no problem being nice. It could be because he doesn’t think he has to be vulnerable with them. Surface-level friendships feel less intense than romantic relationships. It might be easy for him to be a good friend but a lousy partner.
Someone emotionally unavailable may struggle to show affection. Whether they are afraid of getting hurt so they pull back, or they have a hard time with emotional intimacy, showing affection is not an easy task for them. It’s a low-quality habit that can make his partner feel inadequate.
10. They never help around the house
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For some reason, men who have no issues being kind to the people in their lives can struggle to show that same respect to the women in their lives. He may seem helpful to others, but in reality, that behavior stops the second he comes home. At work, he may be the first to step up for a task. At home, he has a bad habit of not helping around the house, no matter how many times his partner asks him.
Housework can be a serious issue in a partnership. When a man fails to pull his weight, he puts a strain on the relationship. His partner feels resentful. He will have no problem expecting her to do everything from cooking and cleaning to errands and laundry.
11. They are difficult to talk to
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There is a stigma around men sharing their emotions and opening up to others. It might be easier for them to be nice to the people in their lives who do not expect them to be vulnerable. In some friendships, there is little depth. They’re just fun people to hang out with. This is never the case in romantic relationships. A man has to be open and easy to talk to to maintain a happy partnership.
Women may find their partners are the life of the party, but when they are home alone together, he is difficult to talk to. He seems to be cold and rarely cares about the conversation at hand. It’s a low-quality habit that makes them less kind to their partners than to others. When it comes to sharing his feelings, it seems impossible. They can make their partner feel less important with a lack of communication.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
