People Who Feel Disrespected In Their Own Home Show These 11 Signs
Andrii Iemelianenko | Shutterstock When people invite friends and family over to their home, they're expecting connection and good conversation, not disrespect. Unfortunately, when someone doesn't get the memo, they may start spouting backhanded compliments or complain about minutiae. Home is a sacred place for most people, so when they invite others over, imagine their surprise and disappointment when they're met with disrespect.
Whether it's rolling their eyes or making disastrous comments, while they might not say anything out loud, people who feel disrespected in their own home show certain signs. Most people like to give others the benefit of the doubt, but when poor behavior continues, they're not likely to ever invite that person back.
People who feel disrespected in their own home show these 11 signs
1. They're constantly tense
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They might not say anything, but feeling tense is how someone being disrespected might react. From a person's snarky remarks to their dismissive words, it's easy to feel on edge when disrespected, feeling unwelcome or comfortable around this person.
Even if it isn't their intention, their inability to read the room can make someone feel as if they aren't being heard or seen. This, in turn, causes them to freeze.
To avoid this, wellness expert Tchiki Davis suggested, "In addition to the methods of relaxation that you know to be effective for you, there are multiple scientifically supported, non-pharmacological methods for achieving tension reduction through physical relaxation, including Progressive Muscle Relaxation, yoga, heat therapy, cold therapy, and massage."
2. They stop expressing their opinion
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When someone is truly happy and comfortable around someone, they tend to be pretty vocal with their opinion. From what they think of others to silly arguments about whether pancakes or waffles are better, they aren't afraid to be outspoken. But people who feel disrespected in their own home often stop expressing their opinion.
At first, they'll push through their discomfort and do their best to be vulnerable, but the more they're shut down, the more they stop expressing themselves, causing more tension. When in doubt, keep it cordial and if someone is showing you that they don't care for what you have to say, believe them.
3. They withdraw and keep to themselves
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It isn't easy to find someone you instantly connect with. In a world of ghosting and petty behavior, finding genuine connection is a blessing. So, if someone invites a person over to their home, they trust you. Unfortunately, someone might not realize a person's true intentions until it's too late.
People don't really get to know a person until they're one-on-one with them. And if that individual turns out to be completely disrespectful, a person might find themselves withdrawing immediately. As clinical psychologist Jennifer Caspari said, "It is not easy to take emotional risks and open ourselves up to the possibility of being hurt." So, once someone shows how little they care, expect that vulnerability to go right out the window.
4. They fidget excessively
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Disrespectful people don't have self-awareness or a good perception of their behavior. While they might not mean to, they have a way of making everyone around them feel uncomfortable. For the person hosting them, every question or "joke" that guest makes is putting them on edge, causing them to become more anxious.
Because they can't just leave their house, they start fidgeting, whether it's tapping their feet or messing with their clothes. It's an unconscious behavior, and fidgeting is something a person does when they're trying to find a way to calm themselves down without making it too obvious.
5. They look exhausted
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Most people have experienced disrespect at some point, whether it's a co-worker or family member. And dealing with these people day in and day out can get exhausting. When a guest is over and is rude, the host doesn't just want to call them out. Instead, it will show in their appearance, because people who feel disrespected in their own home show signs of exhaustion.
They're forced to listen to ramblings and monitor the emotions around them, causing extreme burnout. And as professor of positive psychology Llewellyn E. van Zyl explained, "Burnout harms memory, focus, verbal skills, multitasking, impulse control, and executive functioning." It's crucial to find ways to release that negative energy; otherwise, it'll continue to get worse.
6. They aren't eating much
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Most people probably don't want to eat around a rude person. Whether that person is just visiting or is living with them, if they're eating, they're heading straight to their private room. It sounds dramatic, but they'd rather wait until they're finished than have to sit through an uncomfortable conversation.
Of course, many disrespectful people don't realize this and wrongly assume the other person is to blame. However, if they were to take a close look at their behavior, they might realize how their actions impact those around them.
7. They apologize excessively
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Deep down inside, people hosting guests know that it isn't their job to apologize. Regardless of what someone says, if they didn't do anything wrong, they should never feel pressured to keep the peace and say sorry for other peoples' sake. Whether it's not having that person's favorite drink or their house being outdated, it doesn't matter.
But when someone throws criticism their way, they feel compelled to say, "I'm sorry." And while they may think they're keeping the peace, doing this in the long run isn't a good habit. As social and health psychologist Juliana Breines pointed out, "Over-apologizing can become self-destructive, signaling excessive self-doubt or insincerity." Not only that, but it makes future apologies look less sincere, leading to more issues and tension.
8. They're quieter than usual
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There's no worse feeling than being disrespected in your own home. Regardless of the intention, this sort of rude behavior can leave a lasting impact. A host won't say it out loud, but they're feeling a bit hurt by the casual disregard and bad behavior. Especially if they admire this person, it's a complete shock.
Now, they have to figure out how to navigate their feelings, while also keeping peace in the household. Of course, this isn't easy, but they do their best by talking softly and becoming increasingly quiet.
9. They start cleaning obsessively
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If there's one thing a disrespectful person is bound to do, it's stress out their host. Their constant remarks and nagging slowly get to others, causing them to find ways to self-soothe. For some, it's tapping their foot, but for others, it's cleaning until they exhaust themselves, trying to find a way to release this energy without exploding.
In the case of cleaning, it's an effective tool. According to medical director Franchell Richard-Hamilton, "Cleaning gives people a sense of mastery and control over their environment, decreasing stress and improving productivity." So, while it may seem random, people who are feeling disrespected are more likely to do this, as it gives them an excuse to avoid confrontation.
10. They leave the room a lot
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It isn't easy to be in the same room as a rude person. They often don't notice how they're making everyone feel until it's far too late. But for the host, though it's their job to make sure everyone is getting along, people who feel disrespected in their own home tend to leave the room quite frequently.
Whether it's excusing themselves to the bathroom or to the kitchen, they're likely to stay out of their seats for as long as possible. Even if it isn't the kindest thing out there, these individuals are only trying to keep their sanity.
11. They become passive-aggressive
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For those who are being disrespectful, they might claim that the other person's behavior is completely uncalled for. The guest, however, might end up rolling their eyes, accusing others of being overly sensitive while avoiding taking accountability for their actions. Luckily, some people don't care, leaving them to react however they see fit.
From subtle shade being thrown all the way to rolling their own eyes, these individuals aren't afraid to show their true colors and will be passive-aggressive. Unlike some who might struggle with people-pleasing tendencies, these individuals allow their natural reaction to take over.
As a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology pointed out, people who are disrespected are more likely to act out in aggression than being disliked. So, at the end of the day, realize that it's a normal reaction to someone else's rude behavior.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
