People Who Are Actually Smart Avoid These 11 Everyday Phrases
Dean Drobot / Shutterstock There are several everyday phrases that highly intelligent people refuse to say. If they feel as though a certain phrase shuts down an opportunity to improve and grow, or it may leave another person feeling an emotional toll, they will avoid saying it.
Intelligent people usually have a deep curiosity and an eagerness to learn as much as they can. They also occasionally possess a high level of emotional intelligence, which influences them to consider how certain things they do or say impact the people around them. Both of these traits ultimately affect the responses a genuinely smart person uses.
People who are actually smart avoid these 11 everyday phrases
1. 'That's not fair'
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Truly intelligent people typically speak constructively. Due to this, they will avoid saying things like “that’s not fair” because it is a phrase typically driven by emotional appeal rather than logical reasoning.
If a smart person is hoping to achieve effective persuasion during a conversation, they will choose phrases that they believe will actually be conducive to them accomplishing this goal and that appeal to another person’s interests. While “that’s not fair” may attempt to be persuasive, it usually fails to actually evoke emotions within the recipient, and a smart person knows and understands this.
2. 'It's not my fault'
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When something goes wrong, people who are actually smart will aim to find the most productive way to solve the problem. They rarely ever react to these situations by saying, “It’s not my fault.”
Instead, they choose to take accountability for their actions and work toward improving rather than avoiding blame and not facing the consequences of their actions. This highlights their emotional intelligence along with the growth mindset that they possess. They realize that by using avoidant phrases, they would be putting a halt to their ability to learn, which is usually something they would not be willing to do.
3. 'I have a dumb question'
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Smart people tend to understand the significance of asking questions, even if they do not always sound the most intellectual. They will hardly ever refer to one of their questions as being dumb because they have a deep understanding of the clarity and intelligence that derive from asking questions.
They realize that everyone has a different perspective and that what might be common sense for one person may be something completely unknown to another. These people also know how significant being able to communicate effectively is, and therefore will have no problem asking more basic questions in order to be a successful communicator.
4. 'This must be done perfectly'
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Developing an understanding that perfection is subjective and that striving for perfection can often lead to procrastination are two major reasons that actually smart people avoid saying that things must be done perfectly. They typically avoid setting unrealistic standards because they understand the importance of feasible growth and value the process of learning and failure that is required to become successful.
Instead of demoralizing others by making them feel as though they have to live up to unachievable expectations, they will still set high expectations, but they will remain realistic. This will be conducive to the growth of individuals and collaborative teams without anyone experiencing burnout caused by too high-pressure environment.
5. 'I can't'
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Limiting themselves is not something actually smart people tend to do very often. When they run into obstacles throughout their lives, they are eager to find ways to overcome instead of deeming themselves incapable of getting past their struggles.
Instead, they develop a growth mindset that allows them to view struggles and failures in a more positive light. “Those with a growth mindset embrace challenges as opportunities to learn and grow. They aren’t discouraged by failure; instead, they see it as a valuable feedback mechanism,” mentions Filiberto Amati, a growth consultant.
6. 'This is the way it's always been done'
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Stagnation and refusal to progress and adapt are traits that most intelligent people tend to avoid developing. Considering this, they are highly unlikely to say, “This is the way it’s always been done.”
This statement shuts down the possibility of an innovative idea improving the way something is done. Someone who is actually smart would embrace and adapt to potential improvements because they understand that although something has worked in the past, it may not anymore, and there is also usually more than one way to do certain things. They would work toward figuring out the most efficient way, not the most common.
7. 'You look tired'
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Smart people usually refrain from making comments to other people that could potentially come across as an insult or a backhanded compliment. This being the case, they won’t tell people that they look tired.
The emotional intelligence that they possess helps them understand that saying something like this to another person could make them feel self-conscious, and it also offers no productive and helpful information. Intelligent people would handle this with more care and offer non-judgmental advice to help the person if they are stressed or ill.
8. 'I'll try'
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Prioritizing action over intention and confidently committing to certain things are two major things intelligent people consider before they speak. They usually avoid saying things like “I’ll try” because they know that a phrase like this seems uncertain.
Smart people are aware that they do not know everything, and they have an understanding of their abilities, but they still may refrain from saying things that make them seem less confident in what they are capable of. They would rather tell someone that they will or will not do something because it shows that they know what they can and cannot do.
9. 'I told you so'
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People who are considered smart will typically have a high level of emotional intelligence and prioritize growth over self-validation. They also enjoy strengthening the relationships they have with others more than damaging them, so that they can feel a boost in their ego.
By telling others “I told you so” when something does not go right for them, they would be making someone feel worse than they likely already do. This would be done purely out of selfish intent, which intelligent people know, which is why they avoid saying phrases like this.
10. 'Whatever, it's up to you'
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Smart people try to consider how the phrases they use may be perceived by the recipient of the phrase. Saying, “Whatever, it’s up to you,” may not inherently sound bad, but it could potentially come across as dismissive or passive. Therefore, these people avoid saying it.
They prefer to engage in communication that is productive and thoughtful. They may also want to avoid making the other person feel solely responsible for certain outcomes, so they will typically make a decision even if it is just to ensure the other person feels less burdened.
11. 'You never...'
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Absolute phrases, like saying that someone never or always does something, are typically going to be factually incorrect. For this reason, people who are actually smart will avoid using everyday phrases like this.
They understand that these phrases are exaggerations of the truth that undermine credibility and lack empathy. Intelligent people choose to speak in ways that not only embrace new perspectives and opportunities for growth and knowledge, but they also do so in ways that take into consideration the emotional impact it will have on others.
Kamryn Idol is a writer with a bachelor's degree in media and journalism who covers lifestyle, relationship, family, and wellness topics.
