11 Things A Man Only Does If He Sees You As A Woman He Wants To Marry
When you know, you know.
GaudiLab | Shutterstock Long-term relationships and marriages are often defined by the big things, like weddings, children, and anniversaries, but the truth is, it's the little things that matter the most. The same is true for the early stages of a relationship or dating someone new — the subtle, seemingly innocent, and unsuspecting habits they indulge are most representative of their romantic love.
Many of the things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry are easy to miss — things like phrases in conversations or holding your hand in public. However, they're strong indicators of romantic love, safety, security, and support that are foundational to building a long-lasting relationship.
Here are 11 things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry
1. He uses 'we' instead of 'I'
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When a man talks about the future or makes plans using "we" instead of "I," that's one of the signs that he sees you as a woman he wants to marry. He's not planning a life of his own without considering you, and even though it may seem subtle in conversations, it's a huge thing, especially if you're early in your relationship.
There are often deep psychological and physical signs that a person is in love, according to a study conducted by anthropologist Helen Fisher, but sometimes it's the little things, like a phrase in a passing conversation, that actually mean the most.
2. He's consistent
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Relationships often take work and thrive when both partners are committed and consistent, according to therapist Dr. Elliot Kronenfeld, which is why subtle things like showing up on time, supporting without judgment, and keeping promises are all things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry.
He's willing to put in the work, even if it means shifting his own schedule and regulating his own emotions better, to support you consistently. It may seem subtle and may not even be noticeable amid the chaos of everyday life, but whether you're arguing or meeting for dinner, he's going to be consistent in how he shows up for you.
3. He checks in with you often
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Checking in consistently is one of the things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry or commit to in the long term. Marriage and family therapist Amy Smith unpacked the foundations for a successful relationship check-in, starting with sharing a positive.
After you've bonded over something you're doing well or that you're grateful for, there's also time to express a concern. Talk about the things that you feel aren't going so well in your relationship or a need that's gone unmet. Then, make a plan to move forward more healthily together.
If a man is willing and enthusiastic about engaging in these kinds of check-ins consistently, and often connects with and supports you in other areas of your life, chances are he sees you as the woman he wants to marry.
4. He builds traditions with you
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A man who's not going anywhere and truly sees a long-term future with you will make an effort to build traditions. Whether it's weekly date nights, holiday traditions, or nightly rituals, he reminds you of his effort, consistency, and commitment often, and in a variety of unique and sometimes unexpected ways.
According to a study published in the Journal of the Association for Consumer Research, couples who have consistent habits and rituals together generally report more happiness and relationship satisfaction than those who don't. So, not only is he expressing love by crafting traditions, he's supporting the well-being of your entire relationship.
5. He protects your reputation
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Of course, habits and rituals at home between partners are essential to their relationship's health, but the way that they speak about their spouses outside of the home is equally important. A man who sees a future with you will never talk badly about you behind your back, but instead make an effort to do the opposite.
In fact, a man who sees you as his future wife will make an effort to protect and defend your reputation — even if it's with friends, family, or co-workers who are speaking negatively about their own families and relationships. A man who truly loves you will never get sick of speaking positively about you. He'll even bring you up to boast and brag for the sake of his own happiness.
6. He's willing to change
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Many research studies argue that couples can stay "madly in love" with their spouses, even decades into a long-term relationship or marriage, if they're committed to evolving and tackling problems as a team. The best partners make an effort to not only love and support their partners, but to seek out personal growth to show up as the best versions of themselves at home.
That's why being willing to change, apologize, and grow are all things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry. Of course, there are certain things that couples should never compromise over in their relationships, but when it comes to things like handling conflict, regulating emotions, and crafting routines, change is often necessary.
7. He embraces vulnerability
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Even though many men tend to struggle with expressing emotions and vulnerability in their relationships, especially before they have the solid motivation and presence of a partner to support them, embracing emotional expression is one of the things a man typically only does when he sees you as a woman he wants to marry.
He's willing to lean into the discomfort of expressing himself and having hard conversations because he feels safe, supported, and loved without judgment around you.
8. He introduces you with pride
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Whether it's his family, his social circle, or his co-workers, introducing you to other people in his life is one of the things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry. The quicker he can integrate you thoughtfully into his social life, the better.
Especially when it comes to giving you a chance to build a relationship with the people he values most in his life, he wants to make sure you feel empowered, comfortable, and supported.
9. He values your opinion
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A man who values your opinion, seeks it out, and has conversations with you openly about finances, your lifestyle, and the future is probably planning to marry you one day. It's not just about compromise and being open, either — he truly appreciates hearing what you think, learning about your curiosities, and having hard conversations with you.
At the end of the day, this interest stems from mutual respect, a foundational aspect of all healthy relationships, whether they're romantic or not. He not only makes space for your voice and listens to you attentively, he also respects you on a deep level.
10. He openly admires you
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Whether it's compliments on physical qualities or a deeper interest in the way that you think, openly admiring you without fear is one of the things a man only does if he sees you as a woman he wants to marry. There's depth to your conversations on a regular basis, but he's also not afraid to make a cheeky comment about your outfit or to compliment your makeup before leaving the house.
Of course, like many of these other signs, the true indicator of relationship well-being is how you feel on the inside. Do you feel loved unconditionally? Do you feel supported, even amid conflict or an argument? Do you see a strong future with this man?
11. He's not afraid of 'PDA'
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A man who's openly interested in subtle "PDA" — public displays of affection — is probably one who truly loves you. From holding your hand walking through the grocery store, to leading you through a crowd, and giving you a hug around his friends, he's not afraid of how other people will perceive him simply for being affectionate with the woman he loves.
Luckily, like a study from Scientific Reports explains, the more affection and physical intimacy in a relationship, the happier each partner is. So, if a man is going out of his way to initiate physical touch in public or at home, chances are he really loves you.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
