People Who Prefer To Text Instead Of Talking On The Phone Usually Have These 11 Reasons
Not all conversations require a phone call. Sometimes a simple text message is exactly what's needed to get the job done.
Xavier Lorenzo | Shutterstock Let’s be honest: talking on the phone isn't always fun — or necessary. In fact, a lot of people flat-out prefer texting over phone calls. From wasting precious hours listening to people ramble to feeling burned out, people who prefer to text instead of talking on the phone usually have these reasons.
Maybe it's about comfort, convenience, or just not having the energy to chat. Whatever the reason, it's not about being rude; it's about communication that actually works for them. If you've ever wondered why some people avoid awkward phone calls, here are the real reasons people would rather text than talk to have a conversation.
People who prefer to text instead of talking on the phone usually have these 11 reasons:
1. They need time to think through what they want to say
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People who prefer texting over talking on the phone usually need more time to think. It's simple, but when someone keeps asking question after question, it's much too easy to trip over your words or get confused. So, to save everyone the headache, they might suggest texting instead of calling.
According to a study published in Computers in Human Behavior Reports, texting was associated with better understanding, but only when face-to-face communication is minimal. However, it’s important to remember that leaning too heavily on texting has its downsides. For instance, consistently avoiding conversations because you need some "time to think" can actually hinder your personal growth.
As it stands, there will almost always be a point at which thinking quickly on their feet comes in handy. While it might be preferable to text instead of being on the phone, it can also be beneficial to have that conversation from time to time. Not only does it force people to think on their feet, but it also improves their social skills in the long run, which is always a plus.
2. Phone calls trigger their social anxiety
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There's no worse feeling than talking to a stranger on the phone. Even if it's something simple, like setting up an appointment, nobody wants to experience the sense of dread that comes with hearing their phone ring. Even so, picking up the phone and facing that social anxiety is pretty inevitable.
Whether people like it or not, there will come a time when getting comfortable on the phone is necessary for doing adulting or managing everyday life. From setting up appointments to calling about bills, it's much better to get comfortable facing that anxiety than it is running away.
According to a study in 2000, having social anxiety often leads people to have fewer friends, which is bad for their overall health. So, while it's understandable to feel anxious, people need to find healthier ways to manage their social anxiety; otherwise, it much just take over their lives, effectively making it much harder.
3. They're trying to juggle a million things at once
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There are two types of people in this world: those who prefer to do everything at once and those who take their time. As it stands, people who prefer texting over calling on the phone usually multitask, as they understand that it'll likely save them a significant amount of time.
Sorry to say, but why call on the phone when people have a million things to do and very little time to do them? From cleaning their house, to grocery shopping, to cooking, there are many reasons why texting instead of calling is much preferable.
That said, multitasking also comes with its fair share of drawbacks. According to the American Psychological Association, as tasks get more complex, it actually takes people more time to complete the task than if they had just done it one at a time. So, while multitasking is very important, it's equally important to pick and choose their battles wisely. Otherwise, they might just find themselves overwhelmed.
4. It’s easier to set and keep boundaries over text
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Everyone's been in this awkward situation before: they're trying to find a way to say no, but the other person isn't picking up on social cues. No matter how much they try to cut them off or sigh, the other person doesn't listen, causing them to feel anxious and unheard.
This is why people who prefer texting over talking on the phone usually do so, as they find it easier to assert their boundaries. It's never easy to set boundaries with people, especially over the phone. Maybe it's because they can't see their face, but learning to say no isn't easy.
According to a survey from YouGov, 48% of people would identify themselves as people pleasers. As a result, they find it more challenging to establish and maintain boundaries. This is why texting is so important. While it might be nice to call, sometimes, for their own mental well-being, they need to set boundaries and text instead.
5. They'd rather skip the small talk and get to the point
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You know that thing where someone calls just to say something like, "So… nice weather today," and then awkwardly fumbles around before getting to the point? Yeah, no thanks. People who prefer texting usually do it because they can say what they need without filler and wasting anyone’s time. Texting keeps things short, clear, and drama-free, which is exactly how they like it.
Let's face it: nobody likes small talk. If given the opportunity, they'd much rather get to the point. According to a study published in Psychological Science, higher levels of well-being are associated with less small talk. But sometimes small talk is unavoidable.
In the office or at a family reunion, small talk is just another way of bridging the gap in a relationship. Even so, there are ways to avoid it, namely by texting. So, while it might be a bit rude to say, "No, I'd rather text instead of call," honesty is sometimes the best policy.
6. Exiting a conversation is way less awkward over text
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Getting off the phone can be weirdly hard, especially if you're too polite to cut someone off, even when you're done talking. With texting, there’s no pressure to keep the conversation going past your limit. You can respond later (or not at all), and no one has to sit through an awkward "Okay… well… I should probably go now…" moment.
Unfortunately, many people are too kind to their own detriment, so they have a really hard time knowing how to end those awkward phone conversations. This is why it's much easier for people to take advantage of that kindness and use it to push boundaries and yap on and on.
According to Professor Ronald E. Riggio, Ph.D., "Very agreeable, empathic, nice people can be targeted for abuse. Their trusting nature can make them victims of fraud." So, while someone might feel bad for texting instead of calling, don't feel too bad. It's much better to text, "I need to go," than trying to leave a conversation while the other person trauma-dumps for hours on end.
7. Phone calls can be emotionally draining
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Everyone has someone in their life whom they love, but they can be emotionally exhausting. From being emotionally unstable to not knowing when to let things go, it can feel like a soap opera plot is happening in their lives every two minutes. This is why people who prefer texting over talking on the phone usually do so, as it's less emotionally exhausting.
They might not like it, but in life, it's essential to set boundaries and know when to say, 'Enough is enough.' As intimidating as it may be, honesty truly is the best policy. And while it might be easier to avoid the conversation completely, it's much better to say, "Hey, I'm not feeling well, is it okay if we text instead,' or, "Hey, I would love to continue texting about this, but right now I'm not up for this conversation.'
Believe it or not, people are much better at handling honesty than you might think. According to the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, people overestimate the cost of honesty. So, while it might be intimidating, setting those boundaries and talking less with emotionally exhausting people is always better for people's mental health.
8. They want receipts for later (just in case)
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When conversations get tricky — whether it’s with a toxic in-law or a sketchy boss — texting gives you proof of what was actually said. People who prefer to text aren't necessarily being paranoid; they just like having a record they can refer back to if things go sideways. It’s not about drama, it’s about protecting their peace (and maybe their job).
Sure, it might sound extreme, but it's much better to have things logged and in order than to wish someone had recorded that phone call. According to Elite Lawyer, "Text messages create a written record of communications, which can be beneficial for maintaining accurate case files."
Even so, this pettiness can become quite exhausting — keeping track of everything that's been said is emotionally draining. Still, most people would attest that it's much better to text a toxic person than it is to have to hear their voice droning on and on for hours on end.
9. They want to avoid conflict or unnecessary drama
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Sure, gossip can be entertaining, but not when it turns into a 3 a.m. sob session and you've got work in five hours. People who prefer texting usually aren't trying to be cold; they simply know that phone calls can spiral out of control quickly. Texting gives them a little distance and control, especially when things start to get messy.
Let's be honest — everyone gossips. However, too much drama or gossip can be detrimental to relationships and to our own mental health. Always hearing negativity and never connecting beyond talking ill about others is bound to leave a bad taste in someone's mouth.
So, when in doubt, ignore that phone call and respond ten minutes later, saying, "I'm really busy right now, but feel free to text." Now, are you actually busy? Maybe not, but putting your mental health first should matter much more than petty drama.
10. They're burned out and don’t have the energy to talk
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Nowadays, it seems like everybody is experiencing burnout. From being overworked and underpaid to doing the most only to be barely acknowledged by their partner, there are plenty of reasons why someone might find themselves burned out. This is why people who prefer texting over talking on the phone do so in the first place.
It's not that they hate phone calls — they just don’t always have the bandwidth for one. When someone's already stretched thin, even a well-meaning call can feel like too much. Texting lets them stay in touch without draining the little energy they've got left.
11. Texting is just what people do now
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For many younger people, texting isn't a preference; it's just how communication works now. Blame it on smartphones, social media, or growing up in a post-COVID world, but calling feels unnecessary unless it's urgent.
It's not personal, and it doesn't mean they love you any less — it's just the default way they connect. It's hard to break free from cultural norms. And in a world that values speed and convenience, daily phone calls just don't make sense to a lot of people anymore — they feel unnecessary, even like a waste of time.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
