The 4 Things Men Think About First When They Meet A Woman
What's really going through his mind in the first few moments.
David MG | Shutterstock We tend to believe the majority of what a man thinks about on a date is related to appearance, but what if guys are thinking about a lot more than just how you look when you first meet?
Men tend to think and analyze a lot when they first get to know a woman. They might not be sitting around with their guy friends for hours talking about the person he is dating and what makes a man attracted to a woman. But they are still spending energy and time thinking about it.
Here are four things men think about when they first meet a woman:
1. 'Does she take care of herself?'
Well-balanced people tend to be happier and spend less on medical care. Many of the superficial things we think men judge women by are signs of having a well-balanced life.
Here are the things he asks himself about if you are well-balanced:
- Is she emotionally and physically self-aware?
- Does she take care of herself?
- Is she too busy?
- How does she listen and respond?
Hot Tip: Have you met those women who tend to increase the positivity in a room? They have the allure of a well-balanced person.
Being radiantly well-balanced is one of the most beneficial things you can do for your love life.
Life coach Kelly Rudolph recommended, "Determine what makes you happy. What are you doing when you feel your best? Where are you? Who, if anyone, are you with? Are you doing an activity like yoga, hiking, reading, hanging out with friends or meditating, having a dinner party, or visiting family? Schedule your "me time" and figure out what you need to help keep your sense of life fulfillment high."
2. 'Does she have her life together?'
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It’s all about compatibility. We are attracted to different types of personalities. Some men like women who are more outgoing, assertive, clever, or sassy. While others like women who are sweet, introverted, nurturing, and emotionally expressive. There is no right or wrong personality, only who you are authentically and what you find compatible.
There are, however, some common questions he asks himself about her personality and what makes her happy.
Here are the things he asks himself about what she needs to be happy:
- Can I make her happy?
- Is she content with life?
- Does she have her life together?
Hot Tip: According to my sources, guys need to feel they can make you happy.
The more success he has in making you genuinely happy, the more attractive he will find you. Allude to the things you love to do that make you happy, and be truly happy doing them with him, and he will be smiling along with you.
Dating coach Dave Elliot explained how men tend to perceive your happiness: "They demonstrate their value by solving problems and fixing things, and occasionally they may make the mistake of trying to fix you."
Elliot continued, "Plus, nothing makes a man feel worse than to feel stuck in a problem he just can't solve, so if you're unhappy too often, at some level, he's failed, and he will try to distance himself from feeling like a failure. By contrast, nothing makes a man feel successful than you when you are happy, which is why a positive, happy, and radiant woman with a sense of humor is so appealing."
3. 'What would my life look like with her?'
It’s all about life goals and how you get there. Many men looking for marriage have intentions for achievements in the outside world. When looking for a wife, he is looking for someone who fits with the goals he would like to achieve.
Similar to personality preferences, different men have differing goals for themselves, and thus are looking for different types of women.
Here are the things he asks himself about your goals:
- What would my life goals look like with her?
- Does she have intentions for her life goals?
- Can we support each other's goals?
- Can we achieve success together?
Hot Tip: Being the best version of yourself will help you attract the best men.
So, make sure you feel good about yourself and how you are presenting. The key is to understand the real you, how you project your authenticity, and embrace it.
"Make a list of ten characteristics you love about yourself and put this list where you can see it every day," advised dating coach Nanice Ellis. "It doesn't matter what is on the list as long as it easily generates good feelings that you have toward yourself. The more you focus on what you love about yourself, the more self-love you will experience. Others will fall in love with you, too, simply because it feels great to be around people who love themselves."
4. 'How does she treat other people?'
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This is about the future and is intertwined with shared goals. This is true for men who are looking to build a family and have kids. When dating, they are picking the mother of their future children. They have imagined what the mother of their children will be like and are looking for someone who can fulfill that.
Here are the things he asks himself about your maternal traits:
- How does she treat other people?
- Would she be a good mother?
- What type of mother would she be?
- Can she be nurturing?
Hot Tip: There is a difference between trying to be his mother (and being overbearing) versus possessing the warmth and kindness that is often associated with a good motherly figure.
Show him your maternal side by being kind and warm to other people. Now you know what he is probably thinking, so do not fall into the trap of overthinking everything you do or say. View this knowledge as a map to help guide you to be the best version of yourself, and feel more comfortable with the uncertainty of dating.
The more knowledge you have about the way men work, the easier the dating process will be, which makes you more successful in finding the perfect husband.
Jasmine Von Hatch is a dating and relationship coach specializing in communication problems, empowering women, online dating, relationships, and more.
