11 Super Rare Signs Of Someone Who Is A Truly Supportive Partner
GalacticDreamer | Shutterstock When a couple has open communication, trust, and respect, they create a strong foundation for their relationship. Unfortunately, relationships without these essentials can fall victim to disconnection and resentment, even if they're well-intentioned.
Perhaps equally as important is support. A supportive person cares about their partner's feelings and needs, and it makes it easier to prioritize what keeps the relationship strong in the first place.
Here are the rare signs of someone who is a truly supportive partner
1. They make space for your emotions, even when they're upset
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Being present in your own emotions while simultaneously making space for another person's isn't easy; in fact, it often takes a lot of practice to achieve. Some people are given the opportunity to practice emotional regulation from a young age, with supportive parents who listen to their emotions and have honest conversations.
For those who didn't get that opportunity, navigating reactionary attachment styles and trying to re-learn self-awareness amid the chaos of life is difficult, but not impossible. Supportive partners typically have these traits or are committed to learning them, making space for their own emotional needs while also listening to yours.
Even in arguments or high-emotion conflicts, supportive partners don't immediately dismiss their significant other's emotions or resort to anger, but rather, cultivate space for both parties to talk, listen, and empathize.
2. They motivate you towards your goals
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When a person has a truly supportive partner, that partner helps them set their goals, on a daily basis and from a more long-term perspective, while also providing encouragement and motivation. If you're trying to save money, but your partner constantly urges you to order takeout or go on an impulsive trip, are they celebrating your goals or sabotaging them?
Similarly to accountability partners for people starting a health journey, supportive partners in intimate relationships show up everyday for their significant other and prioritize healthy habits, mindset, and words of encouragement that motivate both of them to be the best version of themselves.
3. They prioritize quality time together
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Spending your life with someone or being in a long-term relationship isn't always going to be the exciting and intriguing experience social media and societal expectations portray. Instead, it's a sequence of quality time, dates, and conversations that define the health of a connection. While prioritizing planning dates is important, the ability to spend relaxing quality time alone together is equally influential.
The healthiest partners split their time 70/30 with their partners — 70% of their time is spent together, with 30% apart. Supportive partners don't mind doing nothing with their significant others, as long as they're also prioritizing the interests, hobbies, and alone time that supports everyone's emotional health and individual identities.
4. They keep their promises
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Trust is the basis for all relationships. As an Eastern Illinois University research paper found, 100% of respondents to a survey said trustworthiness was a necessary key factor in their intimate connections. Of course, the way a person was raised can also influence their attachment style in a relationship.
So, to achieve the pillars of trust and respect in a relationship, a supportive partner keeps their promises and commitments. Their relationship is founded on security, where both partners feel confident that their emotions and secrets are being cherished by the other, without judgment or unnecessary critique.
5. They're open and honest
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Not only do supportive partners lead with compassion and empathy, they encourage their partners to express their own uncomfortable emotions and needs, even when it's challenging. It's important to ask yourself if your partner is the person you want supporting you during the darkest periods in your life. Will they fully support you, listen without judgment, and make space for grief when you lose a loved one?
If a partner is setting their own needs to the side to prioritize you when you're struggling, it indicates that they're being open and honest, and truly care about you. You trust them to honestly share their own struggles and concerns. And especially from the perspective of taken young women, there is no relationship without trust.
6. They're comfortable discussing and setting boundaries
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In relationships that we're afraid to lose or sabotage, we fear the unknown. For insecure partners that aren't sure about what boundaries look like or how they manifest in their daily lives, creating and setting healthy ones can feel impossible and intimidating. Supportive partners, whether or not they're versed in the intricacies of boundaries, always make space for discussions about their significant other's needs and expectations.
According to life coach Jo Nash, setting and maintaining boundaries requires self-awareness, good communication skills, and a level of assertiveness that can be intimidating for some people. But in order to overcome these fears and set appropriate expectations, you need a supportive partner who is willing to engage in hard conversations with you.
7. They celebrate your successes
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According to leadership expert Mike Robbins, insecurity can sabotage healthy relationships. Oftentimes, people battling low self-esteem struggle to genuinely celebrate and make space for other people's success, because they inherently compare themselves to others.
But when your partner celebrates your successes and doesn't feel threatened or inferior because of it, this is a very rare sign of a truly supportive partner. And that support bonds couples closer together, as one partner watches the other achieve their goals and become a better version of themselves.
8. They respect and value your opinions
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Even for partners that disagree on certain topics or have different experiences, their relationship can still flourish with a commitment to honest and open communication. Supportive partners not only listen to their partners, but encourage them to discuss things they don't agree with, finding common ground and understanding, even when it's difficult.
No matter what the argument or disagreement is about, a supportive partner always makes it a point to get back to basics. A couple may not be on the same page about their opinions towards preferences, but they can still come together and embrace those differences as strengths.
9. They encourage you to invest in other personal relationships
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Insecure partners tend to struggle with "sharing" their significant others with their families and friends, and often have a hard time with anxious thoughts in the face of separation. Supportive partners, on the other hand, acknowledge how a rich social life outside of a relationship can genuinely add value to their connection and encourage individuality, personal growth, and happiness.
In fact, our emotional health is better supported when we invest into platonic relationships in addition to romantic ones. Despite societal pressures to prioritize romance, platonic social connection is equally, if not more, important for safeguarding our health.
10. They lead with empathy
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Empathy is the framework that helps every healthy relationship flourish. When partners lead with empathy, they're more likely to make space in a relationship for communication. When they're centered with compassion, they can better regulate their emotions and celebrate their partner's small wins. Everything comes back to this, because a supportive partner loves unconditionally, even when times are challenging and tough.
As professional educator David Culkin explained, "Empathy is significant for relationships because it can provide insight into the psychological nature of our loved ones, especially during crises. If we approach our partner (and ourselves) with compassion, we can learn to grow our relationship as friends rather than as adversaries."
11. They admit to their mistakes and apologize
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It's not easy for anyone to admit they were wrong or made a mistake, but supportive partners have no problem owning up to it. Instead of passing blame or trying to gaslight their significant other, they take full accountability and do whatever they can to make things right. It shows that they're not only mature, but fully committed to their relationship.
According to associate professor of psychology Karina Schumann, apologizing in relationships goes quite a long way. "Apologies are one of the most powerful tools that people can use in their lives to smooth over their relationships, whether it's for a small little insult, or joke that was unintentionally harmful, or for something really major and severe that can destroy a relationship," she said. "They do a lot to promote forgiveness, to create healing in the relationship, and to reduce anger."
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
