People Who Value Loyalty Over Excitement In Relationships Usually Share These 11 Traits
Inside Creative House / Shutterstock In relationships, we can become obsessed with the excitement they bring. That new love feeling is special. We always want to spend time with that person. There is much to be said about these fun feelings, but for some, that aspect of the relationship isn’t the most important part.
Someone who puts loyalty before anything else values consistency. Before anything else, they want a partner they can rely on. It doesn’t mean that they don’t enjoy moments of excitement with them. That aspect of the relationship is just not the most important. This type of person values true love over something inauthentic that feels fun. They don’t get into relationships only for a good time. They are in it for the long haul.
People who value loyalty over excitement in relationships usually share these 11 traits
1. They are committed
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Some people seem allergic to commitment. They struggle to form long-term bonds with another person. Instead, they would rather play the field. Not everyone is like this. Some people are inherently committed to their romantic relationships. If they have this personality trait, they likely value loyalty over excitement in a relationship.
Committed people are special. They take relationships seriously. It’s important for them to find a loyal partner over someone who fills their life with excitement. This trait makes them loyal partners, and they likely want the same from their significant other. It can be hard to find the balance between a fear of commitment and becoming overly-committed to someone who doesn’t feel the same way towards you. A naturally committed person has mastered the art of providing loyal support.
2. They are consistent
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Showing up every day for your partner isn’t always easy. Life gets hectic. Sometimes, we can be selfish in our relationships. If someone is consistent, they know that it’s important to be there for the person they love through thick and thin. When they find someone loyal to them, they likely return the favor.
With consistency comes greater commitment. When two people show up for each other, no matter what, it shows how special the relationship is. A naturally consistent person values this trait in their relationships over inconsistent but exciting romances.
3. They are authentic
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Authenticity is important in a relationship. While dating someone who bends to fit the mold they think you want can be exciting, it’s not the recipe for long-term success. Authentic people often look for others who are true to themselves. They form special bonds by being open about themselves. With authenticity comes loyalty. Authentic people are likely looking for a partner like this over one who brings excitement to their lives.
When we feel someone is loyal to us, we can show up as our authentic selves. Someone with this trait likely values loyalty over anything else.
4. They are realistic
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Let’s be honest, we’ve all shown up to relationships with unrealistic ideas. Whether it’s trying to bend our partner into the person we’d like them to be, or putting too much pressure on them to be perfect, unrealistic expectations can be a death sentence for a relationship. Naturally realistic people aren’t seeing their relationship through rose-colored glasses. Instead, they are being honest with themselves and their partner. They’d rather someone loyal than a person who provides them with constant excitement.
It’s not uncommon for someone to expect their partner to provide them with excitement, but also to show up for them emotionally, mentally, and physically. Unfortunately, it’s highly unlikely you will find someone who checks every box. If someone is naturally realistic towards life, they may value loyalty over excitement. They know excitement may fade, but loyalty is lasting.
5. They are safe
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Have you ever met someone and felt instantly safe in their presence? I know I have. A person like this is special. They are naturally accepting people. Someone who brings safety and comfort to others may seek the same love from someone else. Instead of putting everything into the exciting parts of the relationship, they know that with loyalty comes a sense of safety, which is more appealing in the long run.
"Emotionally safe does not mean emotionally perfect. It is not realistic to expect people, yourself included, to behave or handle everything perfectly all the time. We are all humans after all. However, there is a difference between occasional missteps or slip-ups and patterns of behavior that most of the time either promote or diminish emotional safety within the relationship," says Clinical Counselor and Multicultural Specialist Avary Lin-Ye, LPC, for the University of Colorado, Denver.
6. They are patient
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If someone is naturally impatient, they may show up differently in a relationship. They may value the moments of excitement over the quiet, special ones. It can be easy to fall into this trap. We may want to have fun first, not thinking about what the future might hold if someone isn’t able to be loyal. Having fun isn’t everything, and someone who naturally has patience may value the importance of loyalty over all else in a partnership.
This type of person shows up in relationships ready to work out anything. They are not going to leave when things get difficult. Instead, they stay loyal and work through their problems. They are likely seeking someone who will provide the same for them.
7. They are trusting
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We all know that without trust, a relationship isn’t going to work out. It may be the most important thing we bring to our romantic partners. However, it’s not always easy to trust other people. If someone is naturally trusting, their approach may be different from that of the average person. They put loyalty over excitement. They know that what matters most in the end is how two people come together for one another. Trust means everything.
When someone is trusting, they likely value loyalty over all else in a relationship. They want to know their partner will provide the support and commitment they deserve.
8. They are clear communicators
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Communication is everything in a relationship. Whether you effectively communicate with your partner can make or break your relationship. Those who are naturally clear communicators likely value loyalty above excitement. To them, they’d rather have a partner whom they can trust over someone who fills their life with exciting but uncertain moments. They value having open and honest conversations above all else.
Clear and effective communicators likely make great long-term partners. They are always there for the person they care most about. Having someone who returns that loyalty is important to them.
9. They are grounded
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When someone brings constant excitement to your life, it’s easy to get wrapped up in that feeling. Being excited to see the person you’re dating is important. However, if the only thing that keeps you coming back for more is their ability to keep you on your toes, you may not be a naturally grounded person. Someone who keeps their feet on the ground understands that there is more to a relationship than doing exciting things with your partner. Instead, they would rather have someone loyal.
Love helps us stay grounded. When someone is naturally grounded in reality, they want a partner who acts the same way. Together, they can manage their emotions and form a trusting bond. Grounded people are likely looking for more in their partnerships than a bit of excitement.
10. They are forward thinkers
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Thinking about the future reshapes our brains. It gives us something to work towards. With goals for the future, a forward-thinker sees relationships as more than just a good time. They likely want to be with someone they can see in their plans. It’s why they may crave loyalty over excitement. They want someone who is in it for the long haul with them.
They may want someone they can make exciting plans with. "When you engage in optimistic future thinking, your brain releases dopamine—a neurotransmitter central to motivation, reward, and the anticipation of positive outcomes. This surge of dopamine not only boosts your mood but also reinforces optimistic thought patterns, encouraging you to keep imagining better possibilities," says Jennice Vilhauer, Ph.D.
11. They are appreciative
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Have you ever met someone who made you feel valued for who you are? They showed their appreciation for you well. It makes you feel good to have someone like this in your life. You know they appreciate everything you do for them. If someone is naturally appreciative, they may be drawn to people they feel are loyal towards them. They respect what they do to make them feel secure in a relationship.
Appreciative people likely want more than excitement in their relationships. When someone treats them with loyalty, they will appreciate it. It’s also likely they will reciprocate that feeling.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
