People Raised In The 60s, 70s & 80s Usually Appreciate 8 Things About Their Parents That Younger Generations Can’t Stand
fotoak | Shutterstock Financial conditions, cultural expectations, where someone grows up, and a million other factors can influence who they become in adulthood. But few things shape us as much as our childhood experiences. Research from University College London found that our childhood circumstances, like the way we're parented (and sometimes not parented), can affect how we handle challenges later in life.
Of course, every generation grows up with different expectations about parenting. People raised in the 60s, 70s, and 80s often had stricter rules and less parental involvement in their personal lives. While some of those experiences weren't necessarily easy at the time, many have grown to appreciate what they learned. Younger generations, on the other hand, tend to have different expectations. That's why certain things older generations appreciate about their parents are the very things younger people can't stand.
People who grew up in the 60s, 70s, and 80s appreciate these 8 things their parents did:
1. They let their kids figure out how to spend their free time
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Many younger generations struggle in adulthood to balance independence and support. It's even causing tension, as they start their own adult lives after having so much guidance and supervision in their impressionable years. The overbearing parents of many Gen Zers instill a subtle sense of entitlement in their kids, where they feel like their parents owe them something in adulthood, even if it's just their time.
But 60s, 70s, and 80s kids make up a good chunk of the latchkey generation, given the freedom to handle boredom and their free time on their own. Of course, this also meant handling discomfort and problems alone, but this generation now appreciates the rewards of unstructured play, especially compared with the outcomes of their younger counterparts.
2. They taught them how to handle money
Considering younger generations today are often financially reliant on their parents in some way, it's no surprise that getting advice in the current economic climate can feel invalidating and patronizing at times, even when it's offered with good intentions.
The topic already carries so much tension and resentment, especially in family dynamics, and adding the extra unsolicited advice tends to do more harm than good.
However, kids just a few decades ago were also living through economic uncertainty, just in a much different way, and having financial lessons, advice, and conversations often felt educational and necessary. Because they could enter adulthood without relying completely on their parents for stability, they could appreciate these lessons without feeling like it was a direct attack on their maturity, success, or life decisions.
3. They didn't expect to know every detail of their kids' lives
While there's no denying the consequences of mental health stigma that have affected older generations of boomers and Gen Xers, as a 2022 study unpacks, for adults healing and finding peace in their own right today, sometimes the privacy is much appreciated.
They don't feel pressured to share every detail about their lives with their parents, and their parents, socialized to protect and value privacy, don't push to know.
However, Gen Zers, who are generally more open about mental health and personal struggles, may have a harder time finding that same balance with their parents. Especially in adulthood, with overbearing parents who still need to feel important and in the know, being pressured to share every detail with their families can feel uncomfortable.
With the added roommate dynamic many Gen Z adults face with their parents, maintaining their boundaries can feel like a constant uphill battle.
4. They taught them how to enjoy life without technology
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For Gen Xers and some millennials, there's nothing but gratitude held for their analog childhoods, before they were forced to adapt to technology, phones, and social media later in life. They had the freedom to play outside. Their parents taught them to craft hobbies and interests offline. They know what life looks like without constant screen time because they didn't even have it during their formative years.
They can appreciate that their parents modeled an analog life, because it's still within reach when they need it.
However, the boundaries and regulations Gen Zers might've encountered with their parents at the same time, coupled with the shame and judgment they sometimes feel for having digital fluency today, are hard to appreciate. Especially as they shift toward analog lifestyles, there's a weird twinge of frustration and secrecy after spending so much of their lives pushing for everyone to accept their digital lifestyles and identities.
They wanted their parents to appreciate and accept their excitement about the internet, which also made it difficult to sometimes appreciate the analog lifestyles their parents upheld when they were growing up.
5. They let kids make mistakes and figure things out on their own
The independence of Gen X childhoods is called into question and labeled as controversial by today's anxious, overbearing parents, but there's something important about teaching kids how to handle life's challenges on their own. Yes, these kids might've missed the emotional support and safe spaces they needed to really thrive, but many also learned to face challenges and discomfort without expecting someone else to fix everything for them.
"We did not, however, grow up with adults who said things like, 'That must have been really hard for you.’ More like: Go outside. Stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about. Just wait until your father gets home," Gen X health counselor Suzanna Quintana explains.
On the other hand, some Gen Zers expect comfort and convenience. Even if it's not directly from their parents, many feel confused and disoriented when they're expected to lean into discomfort to grow, instead of running from it.
6. They taught their children how to work hard
Gen Xers and early millennials were raised with a "toughen up" and "grind through it" mentality, where burnout was even somewhat glamorized. Working hard and being exhausted were important, even if it sometimes came at the expense of their well-being.
It's unfortunate in many ways, considering burnout is tackled by slowing down, taking a step back, and reflecting on where you're giving away too much energy, according to clinical psychologist Erica Wollerman, and Gen Xers didn't always have that safe space.
Loyalty to a company. Long hours. Not talking about your mental health struggles. All of these things forced young people to build a similar kind of resilience, but at the expense of emotional and nervous-system stability. Gen Zers are much less appreciative of that hustle culture mindset, which is why they're pushing for more work-life balance and destigmatizing mental health today.
7. They didn't let them make excuses for everything
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For many Gen Xers and millennials who take pride in their resilience, looking back on tough parenting styles and "get over it" conversations with parents at home doesn't necessarily feel negative. They now have the perspective to see how much it shaped their work ethic and character, even if it felt isolating or angering at the time.
However, Gen Zers are much less accepting of those parenting styles and mindsets. They're all about mental health care, protecting their peace, and avoiding burnout, which explains their distrust of hustle-culture expectations in the workplace.
To them, those same experiences may feel more traumatic and negatively defining in their lives, especially when tough parenting crosses the line into emotional neglect rather than character building.
8. They acted like authority figures instead of friends
Learning to deal and interact with authority figures is necessary for adult success, but we all learned it in very different ways. While Gen Zers might've grown up with strict parents and plenty of supervision, Gen Xers and boomers were often expected to respect their parents' authority without questioning every rule.
"Those authorities know what is true and know what is best, and though we grumble and huff about it, we just must obey. Our parents were the first of these external authorities," counselor Andrea Mathews explains, "and without knowing it, most of us project that model onto other external authorities."
They had to take accountability and respect their parents, in whatever way that looked like at home. Now, in leadership roles and family dynamics of their own, they can appreciate that level of respect themselves.
However, for Gen Zers who value having a say in their relationships with their parents, being expected to obey without asking questions can feel unnecessary and controlling. What older generations may appreciate as a lesson in respect, younger people often see as a lack of independence.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies, focusing on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
