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How to use online dating to find your dream woman.
By Laila Daniel
Last updated on Jan 18, 2024
Is your online dating profile turning women off?
It’s disheartening to have your profile active or to send emails out yet not get a response. It’s also awkward to be on a date with someone yet feel no attraction.
Online dating is risky to your self-esteem any way you shake it. If you’re feeling discouraged, here’s how to attract a woman who will also be attracted to you.
Here are 8 tiny dating profile tricks to immediately attract your dream woman:
1. Post seven to 10 quality profile pictures that represent your life or personality
Women feel closer to you when you open up and share who you are in subtle ways. Imagine your pictures on a movie screen.
If you're giving a preview of the fun parts of life with you, it creates a sense of interest and curiosity in her. It exudes confidence that you’re comfortable and happy in your life. It also allows her the ability to see if she would fit into it.
Quality photos simply radiate happiness because you’re enjoying a hobby or group of people.
For example:
- Athletes could have an action shot showing their love of the game.
- Artists could describe your creations and what they represent to you. Don’t be afraid to show yourself at the Renaissance Festival or DND convention if that’s a part of your life you want to share with someone.
- If you’re thinking, “I don’t have hobbies,” then start going out with family and friends to explore some and post pictures of those outings.
- If you love movies, show excitement by going to a premiere with a friend.
- Parents can show pictures of family-oriented activities or attend kid events. It feels confusing when you post only single pictures but describe yourself as family-oriented.
- Finally, if you’re more of a loner, don’t despair. Just share a few of your favorite solitude spots or views — with you in them!
2. Lead from the beginning
Leading portrays masculinity. Think: Ryan Gosling’s character in Crazy Stupid Love when he walked up to Emma Stone’s character and said, “Do you find me attractive? I find you attractive.”
He remained unruffled, despite her rejection. Clarity is hot. Letting a woman know what interests you in her is flattering. It also helps her decide if she wants to reciprocate interest.
But an important caveat of this is to make sure you only message a woman after you’ve read her profile and are curious about her. Women often prefer you initiate the first messages and topic as it reflects your style.
Introducing yourself and referencing her profile demonstrates courtesy and an opportunity to be witty, dry, serious, formal, or casual. It also distinguishes you as a man pursuing her versus chasing many women with impersonal or generic messages.
Many women prefer you ask for their phone number only after you’ve messaged back and forth in a few different conversations. Often, after you’ve shared your real name and phone number first a woman will share hers.
3. Let her set the pace so you can effectively lead
If she says “I don’t know,” “Maybe,” or “Perhaps,” it means to slow down. Demonstrating more curiosity to get to know her and sharing more of who you are will help her feel more comfortable.
Otherwise, you’re probably moving too fast or putting your desires before hers. That's a turn-off and possibly the reason many women suddenly quit talking to you. Reread this paragraph or all the above is a wasted effort.
Expect and extend manners and courtesy. Your responses to texts and calls should be a priority if you like her. She should also respond to you in a reasonable amount of time based on her personality and lifestyle.
However, more than three days of no contact for either of you often means interest is low.
4. Describe what you do and why you enjoy it
Explain what you love about your job or hobbies. It’s exciting to hear a man share his passion.
If you’re bored or hate your job, focus on sharing what makes you happy.
5. Give heartfelt responses
Share and work into the conversation your interests, dreams, plans, and goals so they flow into various conversations.
Quality responses are usually valued more than quantity or prompt responses. Be thoughtful and sincere. The kind of woman you want to appreciate you for it.
6. End all communications with manners if you two don't connect
Depending on how long you regularly communicated you could say or text, “I appreciated getting to know you, but I don’t think we're the right fit. I wanted to let you know as soon as possible.”
Ghosting is immature.
7. Let your personality shine
Dating profiles greatly differ between men who are dating for fun versus for a relationship. When your online profile represents your full personality in a better way, conversations become less guarded and more authentic.
Relationship-ready men tend to be more curious, detailed, transparent, and direct. They enjoy blossoming friendships as they know their best romantic match is also their future best friend.
8. And don't forget to have fun
Don’t take the whole process too seriously and be your true self. That will enable Ms. Right to see the real you, which increases your ability to attract women who can truly admire and respect you.
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Laila A. Daniel, MA is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Board Certified Tele-Mental Health Counselor.