The Red String Of Fate: What It Is & How To Find Your Thread

This ancient myth might just lead you straight to your soulmate.

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The Red String of Fate, also known as the Red Thread of Fate, refers to an ancient Asian myth of love.

As Wikipedia explains, "The Red Thread of Fate (simplified Chinese: 姻缘红线; traditional Chinese: 姻緣紅線; pinyin: Yīnyuán hóngxiàn), also referred to as the Red Thread of Marriage, and other variants, is an East Asian belief originating from Chinese legend.

"According to this myth, the gods tie an invisible red string around the ankles of those that are destined to meet one another in a certain situation or help each other in a certain way ...


"According to Chinese legend, the deity in charge of 'the red thread' is believed to be Yuè Xià Lǎorén (月下老人), often abbreviated to Yuè Lǎo (月老), the old lunar matchmaker god, who is in charge of marriages. The two people connected by the red thread are destined lovers, regardless of time, place, or circumstances.

"This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break."

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Sweet love myths like this one appear in many cultures around the world.

In Japanese legend, red strings are tied to the pinky finger of one person and the pointer finger of another. The red cord legend is similar to the Western concept of a soulmate or twin flame.

For some, the word ‘fate’ may evoke a sense of fear, as though we have no control over the person we’ll meet and fall in love with.

Do we really choose who we love, or is it destiny? I propose that it’s both.

Love can sweep us off our feet in an instant, and our vibration can attract that of another without speaking a single word. Eyes can make a connection across the room, and words on a computer screen can spark a flame.


But, even if you’re experiencing a surge of love and lust, you’ll need to make moves in order to determine if you’ve found your Red String of Fate.

So, how do you figure out which spark will lead you to your soulmate, and which one will fizzle out?

First, you have to believe in love. It takes courage to go after the love you desire, but remember that you exude energy, and when you put that energy into finding your soulmate, things start to happen.

Focus your energy on the kind of love you want and the laws of quantum physics will kick in to help you find it.

Not sure how to focus your energy on love?

Here are 7 steps you can take to find the threads of your Red String of Fate and fall deeply in love.

1. Learn the difference between love and fear.

Fear can disguise itself as love and it can be challenging to tell them apart. Needing approval, love, or someone to make you happy are actually signs of fear.


Instead, learn to be grateful for who others are, what they bring to the table, and how they bring out the best in you.

A love thread with no fear will send you deeper into a satisfying relationship.

2. Be kind.

Love is kind and compassionate. Practice love by listening patiently with a true desire to understand. Don’t take things too personally, try to control others, or condemn their choices.

Falling in love with your soulmate will require compassion, respect, kindness, and consideration.

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3. Get curious.

Curiosity is a critical piece of love we often forget to practice.

Ask yourself these questions:


Who am I first and foremost?

What do I value?

What do I enjoy?

How do I love to spend my time?

What matters?

If you’re curious about yourself and take the time to understand what you want, finding your Red Thread of Fate is much easier.

4. Love yourself.

Many of us know that self-love is important, but what does this really mean?

To love yourself often means to enjoy your own company, believe in your abilities, and focus on your positive traits. It means cutting out the negative self-talk and taking responsibility to be the best you can be.

If you’re someone who believes bad things about yourself and complains about them, your soulmate is less likely to be drawn to you.


5. Pay attention to synchronicity.

There are no coincidences in life. Everything happens for a reason. When things start to fall into place, that’s called synchronicity.

Most people are so preoccupied with the material world that they never notice these things, but if you pay attention, your soulmate could be right in front of you.

Maybe you happen to forget your packed meal the same day your colleague asks you to join her for lunch with a new co-worker. While enjoying the meal, you hit it off with this new associate who you never would have met if you remembered your lunch box. This is synchrony, which is similar to the law of attraction!

Whenever something like this happens, write it down in a journal and consider what it could mean. These events may just lead you straight to your Red String of Fate.


6. Trust yourself and take action.

There’s a saying that goes “pray, and move your feet.”

It’s not enough to hope or wish to fall in love with your soulmate. You must trust yourself, and act on the signs that show up.

Because you are asking with intention, things will be appearing throughout the day, but you may not see them right away.


Slow down to notice what’s coming to you as opposed to searching for it. It will feel hard to leap but go anyway.

7. Have fun

If you’re not smiling and having fun while in pursuit of your mythical Red String of Fate, you won’t flow into the loving energy you’re seeking.

Life is meant to be lived fully and you’re supposed to feel alive with joy.

It’s not enough to wish for love and hope it manifests.

You must exude energy to attract your soulmate, love yourself, and keep an eye on the universe to see what it’s offering.

Some people may choose to wear a red string on their wrist as a physical reminder to remain positive, know that they aren't alone, and trust that their soulmate is out there.


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Carolyn Hidalgo, CPCC, is a soul relationship coach. To book a free consultation, email her a brief note describing your challenge, or join her judgment-free community of spiritually-minded people by picking up her free guide on living judgment-free on her website.