The sitcom character had her funny moments.
By Chinyere Ibeh — Written on Dec 04, 2020
Schitt’s Creek first premiered in January 2015 and ended in April 2020 following a Netflix resurgence.
The sitcom follows the Rose family who used to be wealthy but lost their money after their business manager backstabbed them, prompting a relocation to the quirky Schitt’s Creek — a town patriarch Johnny Rose initially bought as a joke for his son, David.
Throughout the show's five-year run, Moira Rose, the matriarch of the Rose family played by Catherine O'Hara, uttered various relatable and funny sayings.
Best Moira Rose Quotes
1. “Be careful, John, lest you suffer vertigo from the dizzying heights of your moral ground.” — Moira Rose
2. “Who knows what will befall us tomorrow, John? You could be hit by a Mack truck or bopped on the head by a tiny piece of space debris.” — Moira Rose
3. “The last time I felt this emotionally encumbered I was playing Lady Macbeth on a Crystal Skies cruise ship during Shakespeare at Sea week.” — Moira Rose
4. “Gossip is the devil’s telephone. Best to just hang up.” — Moira Rose
5. “Oh, I’d kill for a good coma right now!” — Moira Rose
6. “This wine is awful. Give me another glass.” — Moira Rose
7. “You are blind to reality and for that, I am most proud.” — Moira Rose
8. “David, stop acting like a disgruntled pelican.” — Moira Rose
9. “So what’s your deal? You’re pretty...what’s that like?” — Moira Rose
10. “The live crows on set welcomed me as one of their own. One even tried to mate.” — Moira Rose
11. “I may have been wrong. You may have been not wrong.” — Moira Rose
12. “With the vigor of a wartime radio operator.” — Moira Rose
13. “A heavy salad might as well be a casserole.” — Moira Rose
14. “As much I would love to contribute to the population growth of this town by way of teen pregnancies, I must decline.” — Moira Rose
15. “Eva Longoria and I were supposed to perform our ventriloquist act for the Everybody Nose Benefit for Juvenile Rhinoplasty when she suddenly drops out due to exhaustion? I had to be both puppet and puppeteer!” — Moira Rose
16. “I once hosted the non-televised portion of the People Choice Awards.” — Moira Rose
17. “Your wayfaring thespian has returned.” — Moira Rose
18. “I’m positively bedeviled with meetings et cetera.” — Moira Rose
19. “Alexis, don’t be ridiculous. That’s exactly the kind of paranoia that makes me wary of spending time with you.” — Moira Rose
20. “There once was a radiant young actress who dreamed of having two sons.” — Moira Rose
21. “If that’s not a cause for alcohol, I don’t know what is.” — Moira Rose
22. "I'm eating egg whites and hoping the building will collapse." — Moira Rose
23. “I would be pleased to RSVP as pending.” — Moira Rose
24. “Fear not, she hath risen!” — Moira Rose
25. “The world is falling apart around us and I’m dying inside.” — Moira Rose
26. “Now is not the time for pettifogging.” — Moira Rose
27. “Who has time amidst all this chaos?” — Moira Rose
28. “Chin chin to you and your husband-to-be.” — Moira Rose
29. “Do you have some kind of childproof lock on this internet?” — Moira Rose
30. “You are bared, lethargic and practically dripping with ennui.” — Moira Rose
31. "Good men always win." — Moira Rose
32. "Never let the bastards get you down!" — Moira Rose
33. "When one of us shines, all of us shine." — Moira Rose
34. "David, are you a dirty peeping Tom?" — Moira Rose
35. "I was worried sick, dear! 'Where's David? Or his bags?'" — Moira Rose
36. "You do realize I'm a professional vocalist?" — Moira Rose
37. "I can hardly hear you, John! The cheering and accolades are drowning out your gentle voice." — Moira Rose
38. "One must champion oneself and say, "I am ready for this!'" — Moira Rose
39. "It's probably nothing but I think I've killed a man." — Moira Rose
40. "Alexis something Rose." — Moira Rose
41. "What you did was impulsive, capricious, and melodramatic... but it was also wrong." — Moira Rose
42. "I'm afraid you and I have arrived at an awkward moment in our parent-child relationship... it seems that there are some nude photographs of me on the internet, and I would like you to search for them." — Moira Rose
43. "Did I used to have a drinking problem?" — Moira Rose
44. "What is the source of this falsehood? And what photo are they using?" — Moira Rose
45. "We have no interest in what's going on with you." — Moira Rose
46. "Let's all go to bed and pray we don't wake up." — Moira Rose
47. "What does burning smell like?" — Moira Rose
48. "Let's go. I've had enough waking hours for one day." — Moira Rose
49. "I won't wear anything with an adhesive backing." — Moira Rose
50. "How mercurial is life...we all imagine being carried from the ashes by the goddess Artemis and here I get a balatron from Barnum & Bailey." — Moira Rose
51. "Why must you be so constantly irksome?" — Moira Rose
52. "This place is almost charming. Very rustic cottage...I was half expecting early Unabomber." — Moira Rose
53. "If airplane safety videos have taught me anything, David, it's that a mother puts her own mask on first." — Moira Rose
54. "Where is bébé's chamber?" — Moira Rose
55. "John, you know I would, but I've already taken my Christmas pills, and bitter experience has taught me I have just 8 minutes to make it safely up the stairs." — Moira Rose
56. "Social media is an amusement park for clinical narcissists." — Moira Rose
57. "Thank you officer for your almost militant commitment to the protection of our community. I promise to keep my husband habilimented from now on." — Moira Rose
58. "It sounds to me like you tow dodged a bacon-wrapped bullet. I'll say it again: life is but a strand of happy accidents." — Moira Rose
59. "Sadly, I won't be able to squire you for today's wedding venue peregrination." — Moira Rose
60. "Wait! My bébé's, my girls! Lorna: second from the left, if she takes on smoke she''ll never recover — and Cindy! I just gave her a blowout!" — Moira Rose
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Chinyere Ibeh (pronounced sha-near-ruh ee-bay) is a writer who covers entertainment and pop culture, quotes, and zodiac signs.