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It's hard to heal the pain you can't see.
By Krizzia Paolyn — Written on Dec 28, 2017
Aries (March 21st to April 19th)
You will not talk about it, and anyone who brings it up will end up dead. You are one hell of a fighter and even though you look tough on the outside, it is just how you try to heal the wound that stings every time you move. There’s nothing wrong when you push people away, but there are times you have to let them in so you can release the fury burned inside you. You are not weak just because you are hurt.
Taurus (April 20th to May 21st)
You will try not to think about it until you completely forgot about the whole idea of what made you sad. You will binge eat until it slowly fades away, until you are no longer hungry for WHY, WHAT and HOW or any possible explanation as to why things are happening to you. You will try to sleep it away until the days pass and you are no longer in the state where you are in now. You don’t have to be afraid of waking up anymore, you can do this.
Gemini (May 22nd to June 21st)
You act like there is nothing wrong. You will laugh and smile today without even a hint of the tears that you had shed last night. Today, and every single day, you are a different kind of strong person acting as if you are not battling a fight that you think no one cares to know about. You are too afraid to show others your vulnerable side because you know it is something they cannot handle.
Cancer (June 22nd to July 22nd)
You will lay around and let things fuck themselves up. You just gave up caring and this how you will try to tend your wounds to heal. This is what makes you feel better because you think you set fire to everything you touch. So you chill out, put your sunglasses on, and carry on. That’s what you do; you carry on over and over again.
Leo (July 23rd to August 22nd)
You think that the best healer for the soul is to pamper thyself. You will try to ignore the loud waves of sadness and turn it into self-love. You will look at the mirror and look for something that needs to be fixed, even if the real wound up part that needs fixing is beneath the layers of skin, desperately screaming for attention.
Virgo (August 23rd to September 22nd)
Fixing yourself is not even on top of your get-it-done list. It is like a brand stamped on your forehead because despite of all the things you get done every day; this is something you can’t just do. Despite of all your organized plans, planning to fix yourself seems to be the impossible one. You are a seeker for the truth and you don’t even know yourself. You don’t let people know this, but even a fixer needs to be fixed. Even a healer needs to be healed.
Libra (September 23rd to October 22nd)
You love others because you think it will fix you. You try to weigh things before you make a decision and in the end, it is always other people’s happiness that you choose over yours. You are a sucker for love, but you don’t love yourself hard enough to feel better about yourself. And you think that putting them first will make you feel contented and fulfilled but still, you don’t. You’re not even halfway there.
Scorpio (October 23rd to November 22nd)
You kill yourself with unkindness unlike how you do it for other people. You are always kind to them, but never to yourself. You give others every benefit of the doubt until there’s no more room for you. Why do you do it? Why do you sacrifice your innocence and carry the weight of the world for them? Is it because it could fix you or because you could help them fix themselves?
Sagittarius (November 23rd to December 21st)
You will curl up in a ball and roll. Play dead until everything stops. You are tired, you always are, but you don’t think that’s a problem at all. As much of a strong independent person you are, you are tired of being alone. Always carrying everything on your own, this is the very reason why you are so good at making things last. Someday someone will take over and carry you instead.
Capricorn (December 22nd to January 20th)
You will get back up as soon as you stumble down; you are not one who stays down after being stepped on. You get back up and fight even with just a toothpick as a weapon. Fighting is your survival; this is how you manage to fix whatever it is that’s broken. You fight and you don’t give up.
Aquarius (January 21st to February 18th)
You move on. You have a low tolerance for drama, so when something happened that you are not sure of, you cut it off. You let it go because you’ve had enough of trying to fix things that only end up hurting you. You are always the first one to let go of the rope in a tug-of-war game because you know that no matter how hard you push and pull you will never win. So, you let it go.
Pisces (February 19th to March 20th)
You will drink away your worries and if it doesn’t get fixed by tonight, you’ll drink again tomorrow. Alcohol became a huge part of your healing because if there’s something inside you that needs to be killed, alcohol is there. You are no longer consuming it, but the other way around. The acid will dissolve the pain and numbness is the only thing you will feel. Remember what your dentist as a child used to say before taking away a part of you that hurts, “You won’t feel it at all.”
Krizzia Paolyn is a wanderer looking for a place to call home. Follow her journey on Instagram and Facebook.
This article was originally published at Thought Catalog. Reprinted with permission from the author.