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There's so much more to your marriage than romance.
By Emma Sarran Webster — Written on Feb 22, 2016
I can't tell you how many times, over the years, I heard the advice, "Marry your best friend." What I didn't realize was that it didn't have to mean marrying a guy who you grew up with and pined for from the safety of the "friend zone" until he realized what he was missing and hooked up with you.
It's entirely possible to meet someone new, start dating, and then become best friends. I write this from the post-altar perspective, while I sit comfortably in a cat onesie next to my husband as we binge-watch Shameless and make intermittent, unrelated jokes about our cats getting jobs. (OK, we're a crazy cat couple. Deal with it.)
Our relationship started out as purely romantic, but he's now also my best friend.
Here are 10 signs you're married to your best friend:
1. Your nicknames for each other are less romantic and funnier... or bizarre ... or both
Think less along the lines of "babe" and "honey" (vom), and more along the lines of "Emma-lemma-ding-dong." Not that I've heard that one before.
2. You have a whole docket of inside jokes that you find pee-in-your-pants hilarious
But that literally no one else finds even remotely funny. And they give you the most judging looks when you let them slip into their presence and then proceed to die of absurd laughter.
3. You never run out of things to talk about
And that's not counting bills, kids, household chores, dinner plans, or the show you're currently binge-watching. Despite the fact that you know pretty much everything there is to know about each other, and see each other almost constantly, you always have something new to talk about, and you can keep the conversation going for hours.
4. You're perfectly content doing nothing together.
I'm not talking about being that couple who may as well live on another planet for how little they see their friends or get out of the house. Rather, when you do have your lazy, frill-free nights, you genuinely enjoy them and have a blast just being in each other's presence, without agonizing over potential better plans and succumbing to FOMO.
5. He (or she) is always the first person you call or text
When you get good news or bad news, read something interesting, hear something ridiculous, or see the most hilarious, "that is so true" quotes on Instagram. You're each other's cheerleaders, confidants, and partners in crime.
6. You make perfect travel partners
You're almost always on the same wavelength as far as where to take your next trip and how to approach the itinerary (read 1,000 books on the destination and schedule yourselves to the minute, or get to where you're going and see what happens?). You don't get bored, sick of, or irritated with each other, no matter how long the vacation or how remote the destination is.
7. You don't have to fight over the remote
Your nights at home aren't constant battles about who gets to watch sports and who gets to watch Real Housewives. Your interests crossover enough — maybe you both love sports, or you both love Real Housewives, or maybe you both were completely obsessed with Parenthood and still lament over its end — that you have plenty of shows you both like to watch together. The same goes for music, movies, and random activities, like unhesitatingly hopping on a human slingshot carnival ride while vacationing at the beach.
8. You can have a whole conversation with each other using no words
Facial expressions only.
9. He or she fits in seamlessly with your group of friends
He's a fixture on the ongoing group text thread, and your friends tell you that they no longer think of him as your husband, but as their friend. Sometimes, he even hangs out with them when you're not around, which isn't weird, because why wouldn't your best friends hang out together?
10. You can be completely and utterly yourself at all times
Crass humor and unflattering selfie out-takes don't have to be hidden in attempts to remain ladylike, and the whole concept of "maintaining an air of mystery" is long gone — not because you've lost that lovin' feeling, but because he's your best friend, he knows the real you, and that's why he married you.
Emma Sarran Webster is a Chicago-based journalist, editor, and content strategist. She is currently a Senior Editor at Mic and a former Contributing Editor at Teen Vogue, with more work appearing in Cosmopolitan, Allure, MTV News, Ozy, WIRED, and Men’s Health, among others.
10 Obvious Signs You Married Your Actual Best Friend
Photo: Emotions studio / Shutterstock
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