Psychology Says People With Actual Common Sense Can't Be Fake In These 11 Situations
Monkey Business Images | Shutterstock While "common sense" is largely subjective, based on groupthink and neurotypical norms, there are still some staples of basic intelligence that most people should know.
Even if it's not necessarily based on scientific knowledge or research, people with actual common sense can't be fake in certain situations, and things like basic manners and looking out for personal safety are all things they do well. They don't perform to be liked, especially when it comes at the expense of well-being, and may struggle being inauthentic because of their inner moral wisdom, practical skills, and intuition.
Psychology says people with actual common sense can't be fake in these 11 situations
1. Working around peers taking shortcuts
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Most people can't help but seek efficiency through shortcuts, AI tools, and a lack of intentional thought. They want things to be predictable and easy, and if they're not, they will latch onto their first excuse to avoid putting in any extra effort.
However, a person with honest common sense doesn't push off effort for someone else to do. Conscientiousness and traits like being a hard-working person are associated with common sense, so they can't be fake and pretend it's okay to do the bare minimum, even if everyone else would prefer to ignore bigger issues and thoughts.
2. Fitting in with socially unaware people
Many little behaviors, like looking before crossing the street or walking at a typical pace, are all "common sense behaviors" founded on social awareness. It's the principle that it's best for the common good to offer small tokens of respect and decency to people by respecting the space you share together, and even your own personal safety.
Social awareness can also stem from different interactions and situations. For example, a truly aware person isn't fake around others, performing to be liked. They don't ignore their gut feelings that someone has bad energy. Especially out in public, with people who are blissfully unaware of themselves and the world around them, it's in a person with common sense's best interest to avoid being fake, because it puts their well-being and safety at risk.
3. Ignoring strangers in a group setting
Greeting people when you walk into a room or saying "hello" to people in an elevator are basic manners that people with common sense know better than to overlook. Even if it's easier to fake being distracted by their phone or their friend group to avoid the discomfort of newness, they don't try to seek comfort before offering respect or making a connection.
Luckily, small conversations, interactions, and positive, casual connections with strangers all feed into our well-being and the commonwealth of the world. We spread good energy and compassion when we look up from our phones and stop "faking" importance at the expense of human connection.
4. Gossiping just because other people are
While it's often easy to lean into gossip and negative conversations for a misguided feeling of "connection" with others, people with actual common sense overlook the allure and convenience of these interactions. They don't need to entertain drama to feel seen, because they're internally gratified first.
It's just basic respect, even in places like the workplace, where it's so easy to cling to a boss or leader and judge their weaknesses with peers. They can't be fake because they know spreading negativity will find its way back to them at one point or another.
5. Being distracted in shared spaces
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From walking super slow or blocking doorways in a crowded space, people with common sense are always cognizant of being a distraction in shared spaces. Their main goals are typically respect and decency, and while these manifest in different ways, in shared public spaces, they are relatively common.
Even holding a door can offer a basic kind of respect to other people and remind them that they're being seen, according to a study from Psychological Science. Yes, it might be easier to fake busyness or engage in conversations with friends to avoid the uncertainty of interactions with the people around you, but that's what a common-sense person lives for.
6. Ignoring a bad person or misbehavior
It's easy to turn a blind eye. It's easy to let misbehavior slip through the cracks. It's easy to let a bad person live their life without calling out their manipulative tendencies. We often find comfort in avoidance, because it's easier in the moment than speaking our mind and setting boundaries.
However, truly intelligent, common-sense people have a greater ability to see the bigger picture. They know that "faking" passiveness to be liked and comfortable isn't worth the long-term consequences of letting manipulative people sabotage their life and well-being. Instead of letting that bad energy seep into their lives, they cultivate courage and resilience by calling out misbehavior.
7. Saying 'yes' to invitations they don't have time for
Instead of overextending themselves and pushing closer to burnout, people with common sense are intentional about managing their energy. Especially as an introvert, who needs alone time and space to recharge their social battery, saying "no" to invitations and tasks they don't have time for is a practice in self-care and self-love.
They look out for their best interests, even if they do sometimes have to inconvenience themselves to show up and help others. However, in situations where they can say "no," instead of people-pleasing, they'd prefer not to be fake and seek validation over rest and reflection.
8. Feeding into stress and chaos in conflict
Getting defensive in the face of constructive criticism or trying to be "right" in an argument with a partner may feel like second nature for insecure, passive people. However, for people with common sense, who prefer to invest in their well-being amid daily life, being "fake" by following the norm in a stressful, emotional situation does quite the opposite.
Especially when truly healthy arguments and conflicts can strengthen their character and relationships, trying to perform, instead of being vulnerable and honest, rarely works in their best interests.
9. Pretending to be overconfident
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Most overconfident people are actually more inaccurate and unskilled than they realize. Their intelligence is reliant on a kind of misguided loudness and overconfidence that truly common-sensical, intelligent people never feed into.
For people with common sense, their intelligence speaks for itself through quietness and intentionality. They don't need to perform overconfidence to convince people that they have something of worth to say, because their actions speak for themselves. Even when it comes to saying "I don't know," they're more comfortable seeking help than pretending they know everything to boost perceptions and status.
10. Blaming other people for personal problems
It's so easy to latch onto someone more vulnerable who's not in a position to stand up for themselves or is even in the room when you're feeling insecure. Blame-shifting provides temporary comfort for someone who's afraid to admit they made a mistake, but in the long term, their avoidance of accountability only amplifies their stress and anxiety.
Instead of refusing to take accountability and avoiding owning up to their mistakes, a person with common sense lets their self-assuredness lead. Their foundation of self and security in life isn't tied to external validation or reassurance, but personal responsibility and accountability, even when it's not convenient.
11. Forcing relationships that aren't working
Outgrowing people is a natural part of life, and people with common sense know that. They don't try to force connections that drain them simply to avoid being alone or prolonging the inevitable. They'd prefer to have the hard conversations and create space to make room in their lives for people and relationships that actually work.
While other people may fake connections to avoid addressing hard truths and solitude, these people lean into the hard conversations that add value to their lives. They know that keeping around someone who only drains them isn't working in anyone's best interest.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
