People With Zero Close Friends Almost Always Use These 11 Phrases When They Talk To You
Halfpoint | Shutterstock While it may have come easier when they were younger, some people have a hard time making friends as adults. Perhaps they're incredibly shy, suffer from low self-esteem, or even prefer to be alone. Whatever the case is, nobody should go through life without friends. Not only can it isolate them, but friendships are essential to our well-being and life span. Unfortunately, it's a reality for some individuals.
You may notice it based on their lack of social connection or from the language they use. Because whether it's feeling like a burden or feeling like they don't fit in anywhere, people with zero close friends almost always use certain phrases when they talk to you. They aren't trying to be rude or inconsiderate on purpose, they just don't understand social etiquette from years without those close connections.
People with zero close friends almost always use these 11 phrases when they talk to you
1. 'I'm used to doing everything alone'
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It's never easy to not have friends. While many people proudly claim to be introverted, sometimes that comes at a cost. Human beings need socialization to thrive, and having close people to depend on impacts a person's health.
As experts from the World Health Organization explained, "Social connection can protect health across the lifespan. It can reduce inflammation, lower the risk of serious health problems, foster mental health, and prevent early death. It can also strengthen the social fabric, contributing to making communities healthier, safer and more prosperous."
On the other hand, they continued, "loneliness and social isolation increase the risk of stroke, heart disease, diabetes, cognitive decline, and premature death. It also affects mental health, with people who are lonely twice as likely to get depressed."
2. 'It's easier not to rely on anyone'
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Most people have someone they can rely on, whether it's a family member or a trusted colleague. They may not have a big friend group, but they have at least one person they can turn to in tough times. Unfortunately, for people with zero friends, their support system is extremely limited.
It sounds bleak, but these individuals have a way of making it seem like it's not a big deal. They could lie and say they're fine, but for one reason or another, they choose to be honest. While this honesty might be uncomfortable, it's a telltale sign that someone's social group isn't as expansive as others may think.
3. 'Nothing lasts forever'
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Whether it's "nothing lasts forever" or "all good things come to an end," people with zero close friends almost always use these phrases when they talk to you. And though there are moments people wish lasted a lifetime, those who have been burned in the past might not have the same outlook.
According to psychotherapist F. Diane Barth, "Studies tell us that many of us fear disappointment so much that we actually change our behavior just so we won't have to feel it." So, some people avoid making friends. While many call them negative, they're doing their best to prepare themselves for what they consider to be inevitable.
4. 'I don't really talk to anyone about that'
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People who have been hurt far too many times slowly begin to shut themselves off from the rest of the world. Thinking the worst of everyone and everything, they don't know how to open up to others. They're so used to being disappointed and disrespected, they've learned to hide their vulnerability.
But since humans are social creatures, this isolation can lead to irreparable damage. According to the Centers for Disease Control, 1 in 3 adults in the United States report feeling lonely. The risks that come with that loneliness include increased risk of depression, anxiety, heart disease, and dementia.
5. 'I don't want to burden anyone'
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In an ideal world, we could always depend on our friends or loved ones for support. It doesn't matter how dire or inconvenient the situation is, because good friends will always be there and reassure you. However, for those who have been stung, this they may have felt belittled or unimportant, and have learned to shut themselves off.
This makes sense because, according to a study published in Journal of Aging and Health, people who felt like their feelings didn't matter to others had higher blood pressure and elevated hormone levels related to the body's fight or flight mode. So, whether it's "I don't want to burden anyone" or "I'm fine on my own," people with zero close friends almost always use these phrases when they talk to you.
6. 'Friends always leave'
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It hurts to hear, but friendships don't always last. As much as we may try to cling to old childhood friends or college roommates, when someone wants to leave, there's nothing we can do to stop them. As painful and hurtful as their behavior may be, no singular human has control over another.
But just because we don't have control over each other doesn't make their actions hurt any less. For people who have zero friends, most of their connections didn't last. No matter how much they tried, people either ghosted them or refused to communicate unless they initiated it first. Over time, these individuals learned to never expect much from others.
7. 'I don't fit in anywhere'
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While some people have great experiences with friends, others have always been the odd ones out. Either too quiet or eccentric, they felt like nobody ever truly understood them. It's not to say they can't go along with strangers or don't know how to act right in public, they just find that when it comes to making meaningful connections, it always ends in disaster.
While it might not bother them at first, not having any close friends can be harmful. After all, friendship makes life a little more pleasant. According to a study published in Developmental Psychology, 11-to-12-year-olds who had their best friends with them during an unpleasant moment reported feeling less stressed than when alone.
8. 'I tend to disappear'
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A lack of friendships isn't always due to other people. While it's easy to point fingers and pretend that everyone else is at fault, the truth of the matter is that a person's actions matter just as much as the next. And when someone thinks this way, it's because others are letting them know they aren't friendship material.
Whether you're expecting a best friend for life or someone who will hang out with you for brunch, when you're flaky and fair-weather, it's normal for others to be put off by that.
9. 'I don't think anyone will notice'
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For people who didn't grow up with a ton of close friends, they have likely always felt invisible. At some points, they might have been in the "in crowd," but were always ignored in favor of someone else. Now, as adults, they may feel like nobody would really notice if they disappeared or stopped responding, because people with zero close friends almost always use these phrases when they talk to you.
Especially in large group settings, they're used to being effectively ignored. So, they're quick to utter this phrase. It's negative, but it's the experience they're used to. And while it may be common, it doesn't make it less harmful. As personal coach Marty Nemko said, "When you're often treated with indifference, you can tend to write yourself off as unworthy."
10. 'I'm not usually invited to things'
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For the average person, they're usually invited out by their friends. Whether it's a casual hangout or an emergency rant session, spending quality time together is crucial for their overall well-being. However, while many may have friends to go to, people with zero close friends don't usually get invited to anything.
People who utter this phrase typically feel abandoned by those who used to be closest to them, and are expressing it in the only way they know how. Is it a vulnerable thing to say? Yes, but it's one of the few honest things you'll hear them say if their walls are so high.
11. 'I overthink everything'
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When people say this, it's not like they want to think about the past or what went wrong. But if they haven't healed yet, all they find themselves doing is thinking. And they are the first to admit that this is another bad thinking pattern they've developed.
As licensed clinical social worker Amy Morin explained, when someone replays harmful moments from the past, it can boost stress chemicals. So, while it's something they need to work on, people with nothing to lose have a tendency to be more upfront than those who are trying to protect their image of being happy when they're really not.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
