12 Normal Things That Feel Deeply Awkward If You’re An Introvert
Everyday situations can be more challenging for introverted people.
Valentine Lacoste | Unsplash I'm an introvert, and although I have come out of my shell a bit since I was a child introvert, I'm nowhere near others who can socialize on a normal level, relatively speaking. I'm far happier alone, ideally at home, on my couch, cuddled up with a book or texting a friend instead of hanging out with them.
It's how I roll. My introversion runs so deep that it’s one of my main reasons for being a freelance writer — to work at home, far from other people with only email as a means of communication, is the greatest job in the world for someone like me. And the fact that I don't have to ever wear pants is just an added incentive.
But, because you can't hide from the world forever, introverts do have to venture out of their comfort zone and face the day-to-day realities of being a human being on this planet. Research recommends focusing on 'stretching kindly' and finding introvert-friendly ways to expand their capacity zone. While it may not seem like a big deal to others, it's more than emotionally and physically trying for us.
Here are twelve normal things that feel deeply awkward if you’re an introvert:
1. Waking up and bumping into your roommate's new boyfriend
Nicoleta Ionescu / Shutterstock
First thought: "Am I supposed to talk to him?" Second thought: "I really need my own place."
Introverts thrive on having time alone to recharge their social batteries. An unexpected guest can feel like an intrusion on this crucial downtime, leaving us feeling overwhelmed and drained.
2. Running into a neighbor you've never seen before
Nicoleta Ionescu / Shutterstock
You feel like you should ask them when they moved in, but you don’t care, so you just let them walk ahead of you in complete silence. Despite what the memes say, we don’t hate people. But we do hate being caught off guard by small talk, especially when we’re already low on energy.
3. Dealing with someone trying to make small talk
Media Whale Stock / Shutterstock
Personally, I always just pretend I have to jump on a call to escape the conversation. It's just better that way. More often than not, small talk becomes the go-to conversation when we’re at a loss for words.
But it gets old fast. Because small talk is neither emotionally nor intellectually stimulating, it can feel like an inefficient use of our limited social energy.
4. Having your name called out at Starbucks when your coffee is ready
ZoFot / Shutterstock
Yeah, I'm right here. No need to draw attention to me! We generally value our personal space and prefer to maintain a certain distance in interactions. Having our name called out publicly can feel intrusive to many of us.
5. Participating in office meetings
wavebreakmedia / Shutterstock
All of them, especially the ones held at a round table. At least it's a good time to get caught up on Candy Crush as you stare at your phone, feigning note-taking.
6. Washing our hands next to someone in the bathroom
ALPA PROD / Shutterstock
Sinks really should have about six feet between them, at least. Public restrooms are sometimes seen as a temporary escape from social interaction and sensory overload. Washing hands next to someone can interrupt this desired solitude. Yes, I know it's a public restroom, but please leave.
7. Waiting patiently for lunch
fizkes / Shutterstock
It's, like, what am I supposed to do with my hands and arms, as I stand here waiting for my turkey wrap? It's easy to feel a little self-conscious or anxious about being among the lunch rush and dodging any potential interactions that don't involve the nice worker behind the counter.
8. Sharing a community tables in the office lunchroom
Srdjan Randjelovic / Shutterstock
You live to eat alone, so this is just a punishment. And why is everyone chewing so loudly? And don't get me started on the unspoken expectation to socialize and make small talk. In this instance, the trek to eat in your car might be worth it.
9. Talking on the phone with a client who refuses to use email
fizkes / Shutterstock
Yes, I get that it's easier than using your fingers sometimes, but it's not easier on our nerves. Sophia Dembling, author of The Introvert's Way: Living A Quiet Life In A Noisy World, summarizes this in an article stating, "Dislike of the phone is often presented as a moral failing. But honestly, it's not the people on the phone we dislike, it's the instrument of delivery."
10. Having happy hour drinks with co-workers
fizkes / Shutterstock
Especially the ones you don't know that well, you don't want to know what well, and there has to be a Law & Order episode on somewhere in the world, so why am I even here? The greatest managers will make sure these types of things aren't perceived as mandatory. It's okay to decline happy hour invitations if you're feeling overwhelmed or if the event doesn't align with your needs.
11. Sharing a cab back downtown with a co-worker you barely know
Tero Vesalainen / Shutterstock
So, how about those Yankees? Oh, wait. The season is over? I would rather stay silent than trade comments on the nice weather or pretend to be interested in whatever sport they watched last night.
12. Having to call in your dinner delivery, rather than use UberEats
fizkes / Shutterstock
You need to find a new favorite place, because this communicating on the phone thing is getting really old. Contactless interactions are preferred to avoid unnecessary human interaction because of the ease and convenience of online ordering. And probably for the restaurant as well.
Amanda Chatel has been a wellness and relationship journalist for over a decade. Her work has been featured in Glamour, Shape, Self, and other outlets.
