Gen Z Refuses To Do These 11 Outdated Things Older Generations Think Are Simply Good Manners
nikkimeel | Shutterstock While advocating for change and stepping away from societal norms, younger generations are now acutely focused on ditching traditional expectations, including certain behaviors considered to be "good manners" by older individuals. Whether it's writing handwritten notes or shaking hands when introducing themselves, Gen Z refuses to do these outdated things older generations think are simply good manners.
Despite research that suggests Gen Z is "filled with optimism about what lies ahead," they remain viewed under the lens of harmful stereotypes and expectations from older generations who feel disrupted by their change-maker attitude. As the world changes, young people have no choice but to adapt, and as they do, what was once considered proper etiquette may now feel tired, unnecessary or oppressive.
Gen Z refuses to do these 11 outdated things older generations think are simply good manners
1. Not looking at their cell phone during a conversation
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According to a study from the Consumer Technology Association, nearly 86% of Gen Zers between the ages of 11 and 26 believe technology is essential to their lives. Whether it's work responsibilities, connecting with friends, or monitoring the news, cell phones and social media have become the epicenter of many young people’s lives.
So, while it’s partially a habit for them to pick up their phone or glance at a screen mid-conversation, the behavior is also driven by a desire to stay connected and informed. It might be easy to overanalyze Gen Z's phone usage, social media time, and reliance on technology, but baby boomers are also compensating for reduced social interactions and community with apps like Facebook and Instagram.
2. Making polite small talk
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Gen Z grew up almost entirely online. That means they were subjected to incredible sensory overload, a hyper-awareness to worldly issues and intense headlines, and the comfortability of connection at their fingertips. So, it’s not entirely surprising that many are closed off to strangers in public.
From making new friends to making small talk with a grocery store employee, Gen Z refuses to do these outdated things older generations think are simply good manners. In fact, they struggle to cultivate in-person connections compared to older generations.
With a hyper-awareness to unsettling news headlines online, many Gen Z people aren’t just uncomfortable with strangers, but fearful of them, making small talk nearly impossible without the buffer of a screen.
3. Not wearing sweatpants in public
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While many people might assume the younger generations have a tendency to wear sweatshirts and sweatpants in public due to sloppiness, the true nature of this rejection of old-school etiquette and manners is comfort.
A Gallup study found that Gen Z struggles to get quality sleep more than their older peers, often battling anxiety, exhaustion, and burnout frequently in their day-to-day lives as a result. Given how stressed this generation feels, it should come as no surprise that they tend to prioritize comfort over formality or fashion standards.
4. Being present instead of taking photos
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When older generations think of the things that annoy them about younger people, it's almost always their tendency to be glued to their phones, taking pictures, rather than immersing themselves in the present moment. Gen Zers take photos at dinner, video recordings at concerts, and exert a great deal of energy trying to perfect a caption.
Meanwhile, baby boomers and Gen Xers consider being present to be a virtue. They believe in making intentional conversation, respecting others by enjoying the moment, and exercising enough self-control to keep themselves from constantly pulling out their phone.
In many ways, this is simply a generational disconnect. Gen Z will nostalgically relish the photos and videos from moments they cherish, while their older companions might simply rely on memories to recall their favorite times.
5. Making eye contact
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With such a reliance on digital communication, many Gen Z individuals struggle with traditional body language expectations like eye contact. Even professional companies are recognizing this shifts and sending employees reminders about paying attention to tone and body language in video conferencing expectation guidelines.
While it might be uncomfortable to acknowledge without judgment, refusing to make eye contact stems from learned behavior rather than disrespect. At the same time, it would be helpful for Gen Z to understand that if they don't communicate clearly, they may be easily misunderstood.
6. Shaking hands during introductions
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Older generations are more comfortable with physical contact than their younger peers. According to a survey from language-learning company Preply, nearly 30% of Gen Z adults argue they’d “fake a phone call” or intentionally wear silent headphones to avoid uncomfortable interactions with other people in public.
And while millennials, baby boomers, and Gen Xers might opt for a handshake, Gen Z refuses to do these outdated things older generations think are simply good manners. They are cognizant of preserving their physical space and autonomy, at least in more casual settings outside of work.
7. Writing thank you notes
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With the convenience of technology and social media, many Gen Zers don't rely on written communication or thank you notes to celebrate and express gratitude to their peers, perhaps with the exception of a startling resurgence of pen pals and handwritten letters to aid email fatigue and comfortable social connection without a screen.
As many older individuals argue, the effectiveness and convenience of our growing societal — from healthcare, to transportation, and social media — has often come at the cost of slow, creative, and intentional practices like writing a handwritten note.
8. Answering the phone politely
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Dubbed “the anxious generation,” according to the National Social Anxiety Center, over 60% of Gen Z people report experiencing heightened social anxiety, stress, and discomfort with social interactions. With social media apps that help to prevent mistakes and allow users to follow conversations at their own pace, many Gen Zers have even grown an apprehension to phone and video calls.
While there are plenty of things that make Gen Zers anxious that really shouldn't, like paying bills or driving a car, older people believe it's quite rude when they don't answer the phone at all. However, it’s more than likely because they’re nervous rather than rude.
9. Dressing up for the airplane
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While many airlines do enforce dress codes, for younger people, it's all about comfort. Whether it's wearing athleisure or keeping a hoodie on hand when they're cold, instead of putting on professional outfits or business casual attire, Gen Z refuses to do these outdated things older generations think are simply good manners.
Perhaps it's because air travel has become more popular in the past two decades, though it’s not necessarily considered the luxury experience it was in many older generations’ lives growing up. For some, a trip on a plane still deserves to be dressed up for, but for Gen Z flyers, it’s a matter of comfort, just like the addition of reclining seats, in-flight monitors, or first class seating arrangements.
10. Taking off their hat
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For older generations, they were used to removing their hat as soon as they entered a building, whether it was for work, school, or a place of worship. To them, it's a sign of respect that's relatively vague in terms of explanation and history. According to the Emily Post Institute, removing your hat started as a way for knights to identify themselves, and over time became a way for men to show respect.
As younger generations debate the practice’s inherently gendered stereotypes, they’re more likely to keep their hat on indoors and when meeting someone new. In general, this practice is less enforced and expected than it once was, even in professional settings where casual dress codes are more popular than ever.
11. Showing up on time
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Whether it's something casual like meeting friends for dinner or more serious like going to work, Gen Zers seem to always show up late. For young people of this age, though, being late is actually on time in a roundabout way. According to a survey by Meeting Canary, 47% of Gen Zers say that arriving 5 to 10 minutes late is still considered punctual, whereas 70% of baby boomers believe being exactly on time is considered late.
Of course, their tendency to be "late" isn't necessarily rude. Rutgers University professor Mark Beal explained, “The majority of the meetings throughout the 30 years of my career rarely, if ever, started [on] time. There’s this line where, if you’re a millennial, a [Gen] Xer, or a boomer, you’re always five minutes early. I just don’t think that’s the case.”
Beal chalks it up to Gen Zers working smarter, not harder, and that they tend to be focused on using their time more productively. While older generations may not quite get it, things change, and it's something we can all get used to.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
