5 Essential Daily Habits That Will Change Your Entire World If You Let Them
David Benes | Unsplash Have you ever wondered how to find meaning in life? Sometimes, you feel too small. Unimportant. Without power or influence. Meaningless. Those are words that can come to mind when you're feeling insignificant. Everyone has momentary lapses of wondering, "Do I matter? Does anyone notice? Am I making a difference? Does what I do matter?"
This sense of smallness hits me most when I’m in a crowded place (like an airport) where no one knows who I am. Or when I stand at the edge of the Grand Canyon, gazing in awe. Try standing outside on a dark, clear night and look upward to the stars. That will make anyone feel insignificant.
It’s normal to have these reflections at times. But when it becomes a frequent visitor to your innermost thoughts, it’s time to take notice. Then, you can choose to change how you think.
What might trigger those feelings? Well, depression can blow feelings of being worthless or non-essential out of proportion. Low self-esteem is another culprit for feeling insignificant. You might also be playing the comparison game, which is an excellent way to trivialize yourself and your life. How much do you compare yourself to others?
Fear and uncertainty can soon follow when you look around and imagine everyone else is doing better than you. What if the truth is that they're looking back and thinking the same about you? Whenever you find yourself tired of feeling insignificant, it may be time to shift your thinking and take meaningful actions to lift your spirits and sense of significance.
Here are 5 essential daily habits that will change your entire world if you let them:
1. Look into the eyes of your loved ones
First, take an inventory of the people you care about and who care about you. Then, rattle off their names. Include your family, extended family, friends, colleagues, mentors, and people who admire you. When you remind yourself that you hold an important place in other people’s hearts and lives, you’ll start feeling a shift. Your feelings of insignificance will diminish accordingly.
Research shows that strong social connections increase your lifespan by 50%, and that's actually more powerful than quitting smoking or exercising regularly. When you stop and really think about the people who care about you and the place you hold in their lives, it shifts something inside you and pushes those feelings of insignificance right out the door.
2. Help someone else
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Now that your support system has reenergized you, who else can you support? Your feelings of insignificance will take a back seat when you reach out to be of service to others. Be the light for someone else. They will feel better, and you, in turn, will have made a difference.
People who volunteer regularly report way better mental health and life satisfaction than people who don't volunteer at all, studies have shown. The cool thing is, when you reach out to help someone else, you're not just making their day better, but you're also giving yourself a genuine boost of purpose and meaning that lifts your whole mood.
3. Make a plan
You might have already heard this before, but you need a reminder when you feel insignificant. Decide on something that can move you forward. Then, put one foot in front of the other. Take baby steps. Pick a small project that you feel passionate about or one that gets your creative juices flowing. Make it meaningful to you. Then, take the first step. Feel the shift?
Research on goal planning shows that when you break big, overwhelming goals into tiny, achievable steps, it seriously amps up your motivation and makes you believe in yourself more. The moment you start taking those baby steps toward something that actually matters to you, you go from feeling totally stuck to feeling like you're finally in control of your own destiny.
4. Stip sizing yourself up against everyone else
Sometimes, you may look in the mirror and not like who’s looking back. It can trigger the launch of the comparison game. "If only I could lose this weight." "I wish I had the volume of business that she has. She’s got it made."
All of these inner thoughts can derail you. You need to shut them down and replace them with ideas and insights that uplift you, instead. "I have different gifts and talents — I’ll focus on those." "I’m working hard on improving my health, and I’ll get there."
"I bring a unique spin on my work that differentiates me." "I'm not like anyone else." Are you feeling more significant now? Studies show that comparing yourself to people who seem like they're doing better than you directly tanks your self-esteem and makes you more depressed. The second you stop sizing yourself up against everyone else and just focus on your own unique strengths and how far you've come, you stop beating yourself up and actually start appreciating the person you are.
5. Act as if you matter
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Look into the mirror, smile, and then take a deep breath. Put your shoulders back and think about all those people in your life who think you’re pretty terrific. Also, think about those you serve. Know that people depend on you.
Wear this knowing like a cloak — it’s your "significance cloak." Step out into the world and step back into your power — because you matter. We all feel the need to belong.
So, what does it take to turn those feelings of insignificance around and start feeling significant? It takes a shift in your thinking and finding a new perspective. It takes a healthy embrace of the fear of the unknown, because you can’t always know what you'll discover on this journey of new thoughts. And it takes doing something different.
Since the definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly, expecting a different result, you will never move beyond your feelings of insignificance unless you change something. What you don’t change, you choose. From this point, you can do things that positively uplift others so that you can make a difference. Your actions define your impact.
As you lean into this, taking those baby steps, your life and the value you bring to others will fill you up in more ways than you can imagine. Open yourself to the possibilities.
María Tomás-Keegan is a certified career and life coach for women, transition expert, and founder of Transition & Thrive with María.
