10 Brilliant Characteristics Of Fiercely Private People Who Don't Need To Prove Themselves To Everyone Around Them

Are you too focused on everyone else's opinion?

Person sitting on a chair writing in a notebook. dekazigzag / Shutterstock

Deemed antisocial or selfish by some, private people might be silently reaping the benefits of traits that are uniquely their own. Celebrating individuality, embracing confidence, and building a trustworthy inner circle — perhaps focusing on your privacy can improve every aspect of your life. 

Here are 10 brilliant characteristics of fiercely private people who don’t need to prove themselves: 

1. Private people think before they speak. 

While many are quick to dive into conversations or engage with others in public, private people are more likely to think before they speak. Understanding the power of words and spending time crafting their opinions and values in their own time, they find peace in taking a quick moment to ensure their thoughts align with their conversations. 


A trait held by few and desired by many — being able to listen actively and speak thoughtfully — is an important skill and characteristic of this group. 

RELATED: The Simple Sign Someone Has Good Manners That Has Nothing To Do With Etiquette

2. They value alone time and are careful with how they spend time with others. 

Alone time can be scary. However, private people harness the power of alone time to their advantage — becoming more self-aware, appreciating small moments in their lives, and growing their confidence.

Spending time with themselves (whether it be taking yourself on a date or simply finding time to wind down), private people find comfort in their time alone. In growing their own wellness, they don’t feel the need to compete or compare themselves with others to find peace.


3. Emotional and compassionate, private people keep their feelings to themselves. 

Dealing with emotions, reacting to strong feelings, and fostering connections with others is part of the human experience, but many people struggle to accept and cope with their feelings.

People who are more private with their emotions tend to deal with them in a healthy way, and that’s far from an easy task. Oftentimes, being able to manage emotions in private can help for more healthy reactions in public. 

4. They have strong values and beliefs. 

Many people grow their beliefs and values from others. Whether it’s conscious or not, people often share the values of their close circle of friends or family. Instead of relying on the outside world, private people spend time away to craft their personal values. 


Enjoying life without seeking validation allows your true values to emerge — privacy breeds confidence. 



RELATED: How To Re-Define Boundaries & Overcome Even The Messiest Childhood

5. They use social media in a healthy way, and for their own creativity. 

Private people don’t need validation from social media; instead, they find peace in their own perspectives, creativity, and small circles. While it’s a trait many don’t have, private people might actually be ahead of their time.




Studies show that more people today are leaning towards a less all-encompassing and smaller approach to social channels. Instead of larger (read: more toxic) platforms, people are moving over to smaller niche apps to connect with their close friends and family. 

So, as social trends start to shift towards less validation online, people might actually be adopting more of the traits private people embody, and reaping the benefits. 

6. Private people are fiercely independent. 

Curious, creative, and confident, private people don’t rely on others to build their own worth. While independence doesn’t have to follow people into every aspect of their lives, being able to thrive alone is a talent many private people have mastered. 


Even if you don’t consider yourself to be private or particularly value alone time, finding ways to incorporate independence into areas of your life can be beneficial. Whether it’s financial like starting a safety fund, social like taking yourself out for coffee, or emotional like doing some meditation, independence is a virtue many should try to channel. 

RELATED: The 'Magic' Trait You Already Possess That's Key To Making Better Decisions

7. They keep secrets well and other people trust them. 

While many people trust private individuals to keep their secrets safe, they also find comfort in building a connection with someone who doesn’t throw relationships around often. 


8. Private people have strong boundaries.

Creating boundaries and sticking to them is something everyone struggles with at least once in their lifetime. Oftentimes acknowledging you need boundaries in the first place is the hardest part. 

Private people don’t allow others to meddle in their lives at inappropriate times — they say no when necessary, don’t seek approval or fear rejection, and protect their alone time. All of these are made possible by having healthy boundaries. 



RELATED: 3 Characteristics Of The Smartest, Most Competent People (That You Can Master, Too)


9. They are motivated and know what they want in life. 

With time away from the trends and fads of the public, private people have time to develop their own goals in life. Present and engaged with their own minds, they find comfort in developing their own life paths rather than following the in-crowd.

10. They have great time management skills. 

Because they’re not often relying on others to complete their work or troubleshoot a problem, private people stick to their own schedules. They are successful in managing their time and are usually able to meet deadlines and remain punctual.



Private people value their own time and don’t easily give in to peer pressure, unhealthy behaviors, and unwelcoming environments. For introverts and extroverts alike, valuing your privacy can benefit so many aspects of your life! 


RELATED: Why Introverts See The World More Accurately Than Extroverts, According To Research

Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango focusing on pop culture analysis and human interest stories.