11 Brilliant Ways Medieval People Told Someone They Were Canceling Plans That You Can Totally Steal
Ironika | Shutterstock Our language as a culture is constantly shifting and changing, from Gen Z slang today to Old English in the 5th century. While most of the phrases and language we use today are formed by our needs and environments, there’s nothing wrong with a blast from the past. Sometimes, medieval phrases and Old English just drive the point home even more.
So, if your social battery is drained or you’re trying to protect your solitude, try these brilliant ways medieval people told someone they were canceling plans that you can totally steal. Compared to “I’m too tired” or “I have a lot on my plate,” you can make someone laugh or feel slightly confused in favor of your alone time and rest.
Here are 11 brilliant ways medieval people told someone they were canceling plans that you can totally steal
1. ‘I fear I am not in a fit state to be perceived’
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The fear of being perceived is a human dilemma, but there’s no denying that it’s not a phrase that’s incredibly ingrained in our modern culture. “Don’t perceive me” and “Do you think they like me?” are things we hear often from our anxious or self-conscious friends, but centuries ago, the same problems persisted.
Of course, just because it’s taken form in modern slang doesn’t mean it’s not a powerful fear. According to a study from Stress & Health, worrying about other people’s judgments and being perceived in social situations can often spark more stress, worry, and depressive-like symptoms.
However, instead of opting for a modern phrase when you need to cancel plans, something like “I fear I am not in a fit state to be perceived” lands that point home in an even more unique way. You’re showcasing your humor and your intelligence, while still getting the chance to appreciate your solitude without worry.
2. ‘I’ve had a vision, and it’s led me to my chambers’
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Your intuitive powers have a place in Old English lingo! If you’re feeling drained after work or need a fun excuse to stay at home on a weekend, a medieval phrase like “I’ve had a vision, and it’s led me to my chambers” is the perfect way to spend your evening in bed.
While research, like a study from Michigan State University, avidly reminds us to never lie when we’re canceling plans, especially to our close friends, offering an excuse like this is the perfect middle ground between respect for loved ones and personal solitude at home after a long day.
3. ‘I shan’t rise today, the candle within has grown dim’
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Much like our social battery, our “internal flame,” in Old English terms, is a reminder of how much energy we have to offer. If our flame inside grows weary, our tolerance for social interaction and leaving the house lessens.
“I shan’t rise today, the candle within has grown dim” is the perfect replacement for something like, “I’m too tired, I’m not coming.” Whether you’re an introverted person or an extrovert, everyone’s social batteries need a break from taxing social interactions from time to time.
4. ‘I’d rather commune with cheeses and regret’
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Even for people who love their friends and dancing on a dance floor until the early morning hours, not every social plan is worth making time for. Sometimes, we just want to eat in our beds, linger in our longing, and rest without distractions.
You’d rather “commune with cheeses and regret” than get ready for a night out on the town sometimes — and that’s perfectly fine. You know what you need. Good friends won’t pushback on things they know will hurt you. As long as you’re being honest with yourself and with your peers when canceling, you’re looking out for yourself in the long run.
5. ‘I am summoned by duties most grave, mine bed’
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Sometimes, we can’t hang up on a call from our beds. Especially for people who have taxing personal obligations, long work hours, and a quickly drained social battery, social plans aren’t always in the cards for us at the end of the long day.
Even if other people, who overwork themselves without caution or have much more manageable routines to attend to, judge you for a few moments for being “summoned by a grave duty,” like your comfy bed, so be it. If you’re “summoned by your bed,” you must answer the call.
6. ‘Mine bones creaketh, and my soul doth sigh, I musn’t attend’
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There’s a lot of science behind the art of resting, especially for people with stressful obligations and routines, according to professor Tiffany Moon. Even if it disrupts other people’s social plans or requires a last-minute cancellation from time to time, we’re all better off prioritizing our rest, instead of overworking for the sake of external praise and approval.
With a phrase like “mine bones creaketh, and my soul doth sigh,” you’re essentially saying all of that. You’re too tired to go out. You’re not coming. Your body is far too fatigued to consider getting ready and hitting the town. It’s just phrased in a much more fun, interesting way.
7. ‘A plague of fatigue hath beset me’
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People are constantly fatigued by many things, from being overworked in their jobs to existing in unbalanced relationships at home. Sometimes, that exhaustion hits mentally. Other times it's entirely emotional. Regardless of how it manifests, rest is the only key to solving burnout, unless it continues to harm productivity and general well-being.
While “I’m too tired” and “I had a bad day at work” are all completely acceptable excuses for canceling plans, sometimes overusing these modern phrases can ensure they lose meaning. “A plague of fatigue hath beset me” might not overcome the disappointment your friends or peers face when you cancel plans, but it might at least offer them a minute of laughter.
8. ‘Pray for my absence, I’ve chosen peace over nonsense’
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Counselor Lynne Reeves Griffin suggests that small talk is often draining and exhausting for introverts, but even extroverted people can sometimes be quickly annoyed by superficial interactions, especially when they’re already tired. Fatigue and exhaustion can quickly prompt irritability, and if you’re not interested in “choosing nonsense,” you might need a medieval phrase to get you through.
“Pray for my absence, I’ve chosen peace over nonsense” will always be better than something like “They’re so annoying, I’m not coming” or “I’m too tired to deal with their fakeness tonight.”
9. ‘The stars do not align for such merriment tonight’
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Instead of “that doesn’t sound fun” or “I’m too busy” when someone offers you a social plan at the last minute, try a medieval phrase like “the stars do not align for such merriment tonight.” You might have to jot it down in your phone to copy and paste in a group chat or memorize it to maximize its full potential in conversations, but it’s worth it.
If you can encourage someone to crack a smile, chances are they’ll take your cancellation much better.
10. ‘My couch and sanity require my presence’
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The last thing many of us want to do when we’re leaving work is hit a “happy hour” or go home to get ready for a night out on the town. Sometimes, it’s worth pushing through the discomfort to spend quality time with friends or to show up for someone you love, but other times, it’s important to have one of these medieval phrases in your back pocket.
“My couch and sanity require my presence” is just one example. It’s a brilliantly funny, unique way to cancel plans.
11. ‘The hour groweth late, so too doth my tolerance’
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“The hour groweth late, so too doth my tolerance” is another way of saying a phrase like “I’m not a night person” or “It’s too late for me to go out.” You’re protecting your evening and time for rest, even if it’s annoying and disappointing for other people.
According to Stanford Medicine experts, sometimes “night owl” behavior can actually harm mental and physical health. Especially for people who get up early and work long days, trying to stay up late for the sake of social approval or attention can be easily draining and lead to long-lasting exhaustion.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
