The Art Of Being Authentic: 6 Simple Ways To Become Who You Were Meant To Be
Rovshan Nazirli | Pexels Most people want to become the best versions of themselves so they can build the best version of their life. The problem is, they often base these goals on what makes other people happy. They simply don't know what is authentic to them.
When I talk about authenticity, I often think of a story told by Tracy Litt. When was 28 years old, she hit a low point. Her husband had recently left her, she was living in a new home with a new baby. One evening, she was so overcome by what was happening, she found herself on the floor of her garage, curled in a ball, sobbing. And that’s when it hit her: She knew she was meant for a better life.
Her own decisions, her insistence on trying to fit a square peg in a round hole, and her failure to acknowledge warning signs along the way had brought her to that moment. It was there that she met her highest self, who told her to get up, brush herself off, and move forward.
Don't worry, you don't have to be in crisis to find the life you were meant to live. You can start now.
The art of being authentic: 6 simple ways to become who you were meant to be
1. Be quiet
Moments of quiet bring clarity. When you’re quiet, you can connect to your higher self.
The problem is, no one is raised to trust themselves. It’s something you must practice. Sometimes, moments of quiet are forced on you.
But there's a way to practice listening to that inner voice daily. Find some time each day to sit on the ground, touch your heart, and breathe in and out.
Just sit. Be with yourself and follow your inner guidance. Practice this with each decision you face. When you do, you build trust in yourself, and your highest self can emerge.
2. Feel your feelings
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Maybe you want to change, but you don’t want to feel anything while you do. It's simply not possible to change without feeling your feelings.
Once you’re quiet, you’ll begin to feel. Allow these moments, don’t push them away.
The truth is, this will be uncomfortable. That’s OK! The discomfort allows you to ask, "Whose life am I leading? Is this life what I wanted for myself?"
This step is a process and a practice. You must move from external validation, such as permission and approval from those outside yourself, to an inward journey where you trust and listen to yourself.
We’re rarely taught to acknowledge the relationship with ourselves. But Tracy believes the relationship with yourself needs to come before all the other relationships in our lives. Only then can you show up to serve, listen, love, and laugh as your highest self.
3. Learn to embrace your fear
Everyone fears the idea of leaning in and seeing their true self, because the life they live may not be fully representative of that person.
But, Tracy lives by this anonymous quote: "The definition of hell is on my last day on Earth, the person I became will meet the person I could have become."
Every day, you have the opportunity to ensure that you're healing, growing, and expanding into that highest version of yourself. But, to do so, you have to be willing to move away from the familiar and embrace new feelings, new thoughts, and new things.
Be warned, though, when you do, fear will show up. That’s why it’s time to learn to love and embrace your fear.
Fear is a good thing. It helps you survive. But you know you want more, you want to thrive. You need to hear what your true self is telling you. And when you’re moving to a place closer to your highest self, your old beliefs and feelings will surface.
Fear is an indication of your growth and expansion. Starting a business, growing a career, leaving a marriage, starting a new relationship, shifting your parenting, writing a novel. Any time you’re pushing your edges out, changing for the better, fear will show up.
So, what do you do? Tell fear that it’s OK, that it doesn’t need to stop you. The truth is, you're more powerful than your fear. You can get around it. It’s not a wall.
So, bring it close, embrace it, and then loudly tell it "no."
4. Practice gratitude
The baby from Tracy’s breakdown moment is now 16. When she looks back at that time, she's grateful for the gift that time gave her and the opportunity to find her highest self.
Look back at your past. If you look back at any moment as anything other than part of the divine plan for who you are and who you’re supposed to be, you’re creating a level of suffering that’s unnecessary.
Instead, practice gratitude for where you come from and where you’re headed. You won’t just survive — you’ll thrive.
5. Keep growing
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It’s important to know that these changes are not a one-time thing. Rebranding who you are is consistent as you grow. It’s the identity shift, the evolution, the next level.
But, it doesn’t stop. Who you were two years ago is not who you are today. And who you are today is not who you’ll be two years from now.
You’re either growing or you’re dying. When you’re growing, you’re becoming.
Focus on the "-ing." You're a human being who is be-ing, have-ing, and do-ing. So, keep growing!
6. Accept that you don't need to know everything
You have to be willing to do it wrong, so you can get it right. Don’t try to solve things before you have any experience with the thing you’re trying to solve. You don’t need to know everything.
If this is hard for you, you’re not alone. Most of us operate under high levels of control. This can stem from how you were raised or your own life experience thus far.
Your mind hates the unfamiliar and longs for a sense of control. But the truth is that nothing is under your control. So, stop making things up and adding to the story before it happens. When you can admit you don’t know what’s next with optimism and a smile, you can lean into what’s to come.
Are you ready to take your life to the next level? Follow the steps above, and you’ll be on the way to discovering your highest self.
Hilary DeCesare is the Founder and CEO of The ReLaunch Co. She’s appeared on ABC’s The Secret Millionaire and on major news outlets such as CBS, ABC, Fox, and Huffington Post.
