9 Subtle Signs You Have High Emotional Intelligence

Your emotional intelligence is on point.

By Andrea Davis — Written on Aug 19, 2021

Photo: Jacob Lund / Shutterstock

What is emotional intelligence? Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, control, and gauge the emotions and feelings of yourself and others.

Having emotional intelligence means that you are capable of assessing every situation from an agile point of view in order to act accordingly. You aren’t overthrown by your thoughts and emotions because you’re in complete control of them.

Emotional intelligence is made up of five characteristics: self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy, motivation, and social skills. People with high emotional intelligence are known for their reliability and trustworthiness.

Not sure if you have high emotional intelligence? We've broken down the characteristics into 9 signs that show you have a high EQ (emotional intelligence quotient).

The goods news is that if any of these traits describe you, you are completely in control of your feelings and are an emotionally intelligent person!

Look for these signs of high emotional intelligence to see if you are able to control your feelings:

1. You’re self-aware.

You’re able to perceive emotions as they come without becoming easily overwhelmed. You know how to channel those emotions in a positive manner instead of letting them become destructive.

2. You know your strengths and weaknesses.

Emotionally intelligent people are aware of what their strengths and weaknesses are.

Your weaknesses aren’t an issue because you know how to accentuate your strengths to the fullest extent. You recognize what it is you need to work on for the future, but you know that your weaknesses do not make you weak.

You respond well to constructive feedback and use it to motivate yourself to do better in the future.

3. You choose wisely with what you react to.

You’re extremely picky with what you put time and effort into. You don’t like to waste your time. An emotionally intelligent person recognizes that every situation doesn’t deserve a reaction.

4. You’re a skilled-active listener.

Individuals with high emotional intelligence can effortlessly adapt to their surroundings and read emotions in order to better understand a situation.

You know that there’s a major difference between “listening” and “hearing.” You listen for the ability to understand rather than listen to come up with a response.

5. You’re self-motivated.

Your goals are important to you because you’ve built a foundation of motivation within yourself. You’re well aware that the road to success takes time and you’re okay with that.

You feel a sense of personal growth daily and strongly believe that the only way to fail is by giving up.

6. You’re capable of figuring out why you’re upset.

An emotionally intelligent person can easily figure out what is bothering them.

You’re in tune with your deepest emotions and know how to eliminate the urge for negative-self talk. You’re constantly exploring your inner-most feelings and always picking apart your brain.

7. You have made peace with the past.

You use the past as motivation to create a bright future. You don’t let your past failures consume you with negativity. Instead, you use it as a guideline in order to never make the same mistakes again.

This also means you aren't hanging onto resentment and have given yourself a chance to heal after someone has wronged you.

8. You’re able to read people like a book.

You’re always fully aware of body movements, hand gestures, and facial expressions while engaging in conversation.