People With Zero Respect For Other People's Time Almost Always Use 9 Phrases In Casual Conversation
Andrea Piacquadio | Pexels Respect looks different to everyone, but things like showing up on time and being a consistent person are universal.
Some make an effort to show people they care by being present, while others make it clear that they care more about themselves and their own personal comfort. A person's actions can reveal disrespect quickly, and people with zero respect for others' time also almost always use these phrases that give them away.
Phrases people with zero respect for others' time almost always say
1. 'I'm actually too busy'
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We're all human. Things come up and we have to cancel plans, sometimes without the most gracious amount of time before telling someone. But when someone consistently cancels plans at the last minute and puts their own convenience above showing up for people when it really matters, that's disrespectful.
You should never lie to your loved ones about why you're canceling if you're trying to build trust. But regularly saying "I'm too tired" or "I'm actually too busy" can make someone feel unvalued.
The price of a good relationship and community is inconvenience, and sometimes that means showing someone that you respect their time by showing up for them when it's not easy to.
2. 'Why are you so upset?'
On top of actively disrespecting someone's time by showing up late or bailing on plans, many people who lack empathy in these situations will also invalidate another's hurt.
They get defensive because their own comfort is most important. When someone expresses that they feel disrespected, they feel like they have to justify their behavior, instead of just apologizing.
Even when we don't always agree with someone's emotions or feel like we did anything wrong, supporting their feelings will make them feel respected, rather than trying to dismiss and invalidate how they feel.
3. 'It won't take that long'
In our culture of convenience, asking for a small favor and offering to help someone are incredibly valuable. It's difficult to ask for that help, but most people actually feel better about themselves and social situations when they can support someone.
Someone who downplays a task or tries to understate how much effort or time a small favor will take can come off as disrespectful, though. They're trying to seek help in selfish ways, clearly not caring if they're intruding on someone's personal time or emotional energy.
4. 'I need your help right now'
Entitled people expect access to everyone all the time. They show subtle disrespect for others' time and energy because they expect people to drop everything when they need something, even if they wouldn't offer the same.
Usually, if someone sets a boundary or says "no" after they say "I need your help right now," it's clear they don't care about your time. They're defensive and angry when they're turned down because they feel entitled to your time, but aren't respectful and intentional about it.
5. 'Yeah, I forgot'
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Forgetting plans and commitments is natural. In fact, sometimes forgetting things actually makes us better cognitively, and even sparks change that helps us show up next time for the people we care about.
Unfortunately, if someone's trying to justify not showing up for you over and over again by using an excuse like "I forgot," they probably just don't respect your time. Even the most forgetful people will figure out how to support the people they love, even if it takes more effort and planning to keep their ducks in a row.
Them justifying inconsistency or being an unreliable person, instead of owning up to their behavior, is a clear red flag that they care more about their own ease than your time.
6. 'Is this even important?'
A mix of entitlement and a lack of empathy often causes people to undervalue other people's time and energy. They believe that their own needs will always be more important than whatever someone else is doing.
Saying "Is this even important?" when someone can't help them or is clearly busy when they're asking for a favor is their way of invalidating someone else's work for their own gain. They'll do whatever it takes to protect their own comfort, despite it making another person feel insecure and stressed.
7. 'But I can't go without you'
When asking kindly and trying to make negotiations doesn't work, someone who feels entitled to your time may use a guilt-tripping phrase like "I can't go without you" to get their way. To cope with their own insecurity, they're projecting shame and trying to make someone feel bad for not saying "yes" to a social outing or invitation.
Around empathetic and kind people, who are more likely to feel someone else's emotions as their own, this kind of guilt-tripping can be insidious. They're more likely to take on some of that guilt, because they care about how someone else feels.
8. 'I just really need you right now'
Weaponizing commitment or empathy is how people who don't respect your time get what they want without feeling guilty. They make someone else feel responsible for their comfort when they can't protect it themselves.
Whether it's answering a phone call when they're having a bad day or guilt-tripping someone into saying "yes" to plans they don't have time for, these kinds of people will go to any lengths to get someone to make their own lives easier.
9. 'I don't know what you want me to do'
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Showing someone that you respect their needs is relatively straightforward. Be a reliable person. Show up consistently. Apologize when you're late or have to cancel. But so many people still find a way to dodge accountability to protect their own insecurities.
When they're called out for being a disrespectful or unreliable person, they're still only worried about their own comfort. They try to blame others and put responsibility onto them by saying "I don't know what you want me to do," when the answer is quite clear for more secure adults.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
