People With Zero Chill Almost Always Have These 11 Frustrating Habits
Vladeep / Shutterstock When you think of someone with zero chill, a specific person probably comes to mind. We all know someone who struggles with going with the flow. Uptight people have a hard time adjusting to life’s changes. Instead, they want things to go a certain way and attempt to control the situation.
People without psychological flexibility face roadblocks. They do not cope well with situations that fall outside of their expectations. Instead of bringing positive change, they fight back. Having no chill makes everyday situations feel more complex. These people are often unafraid to tell others how they feel. Whether they mean to or not, they create a bit of chaos. When someone lacks chill, they can have some seriously frustrating habits.
People with zero chill almost always have these 11 frustrating habits
1. They’re quick to overreact
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We all know someone with no chill who thinks everything is the end of the world. People who overreact can struggle with their emotional response. Instead of processing things clearly, their emotions get in the way. Things that others could easily shake off get under the skin of someone with no chill. As a result, they can be viewed as mean or rude, when in reality, that is just a frustrating habit they have formed over the years.
If someone is quick to snap at those who upset them or is not afraid to hold their horn down in traffic, they may lack chill. They’re overreactive, which can cause problems. It’s not only abrasive to random people, but also frustrating when you are close to them.
2. They require immediate action
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Do you have a friend who needs a response immediately? If you don’t text them back, they will nudge you again to respond. They want you to go into immediate action for them. Whether it’s something simple like returning a text or expecting you to come running the second they ask for a favor, it’s frustrating. They expect you to jump at their call whenever they need you.
Someone with zero chill has too high expectations. They’re in the habit of demanding too much from the people in their lives. They want a lot while giving little in return, which is frustrating.
3. They can’t let things go
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Everyone gets their feelings hurt at some point. Even if the people in our lives have no intention of harming us, things happen. If someone has zero chill, it’s not surprising that they may struggle to let things go. They can hold a grudge because they feel like a victim. Finding forgiveness may not come easily to them.
Someone with no chill may also try to convince others to join them in being upset with someone who hurt them. Since they struggle to let go of things, it can be easier to get more people on board with your pain. Bringing someone else down in the process can even boost their self-esteem.
4. They take everything personally
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When you have zero chill, it can be hard not to take everything to heart. Someone like this may have a frustrating habit of taking everything personally. They do not have to be mentioned by name to feel victimized. Even if someone has good intentions, they may find a way to take it personally and hold a grudge. It’s frustrating for everyone around them.
Deep down, someone like this may struggle with insecurity. Everything feels like a personal attack. They may lack confidence that the world doesn’t always revolve around them and that not everyone they meet has bad intentions.
5. They always have to be in control
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People with zero chill likely want to call all the shots. Being in control of the situation allows them to get what they want. They may have no chill because they deal with anxiety. When someone has anxiety, they feel better if they are calling the shots. While it’s frustrating to deal with this habit, it isn’t always their intention to bother the people around them. If they feel unsafe in a situation, they want to take the reins.
“A person with a 'controlling personality' is driven by high levels of anxiety to feel safe. Though the need for control might be an unconscious feeling, the anxiety can create a strong desire to control surroundings and other people to keep a sense of order,” says Traci Pedersen.
6. They can’t read the room
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People who have no chill may struggle to read the room and the situations around them. This can take shape in how they talk to others. Instead of keeping in mind what’s going on with everyone around them, they are quick to react on their own bias. Rather than participating in the conversation, they focus on sharing their own opinions. It’s difficult for them to keep other people’s feelings in mind.
Sometimes, people who struggle to keep their cool struggle with impulsivity. Without thinking, they will say and do whatever comes to mind. It can be frustrating to be around someone like this, as it can seem like they do not care about your feelings.
7. They take things too far
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We all know someone who gets too caught up in the moment. If everyone is joking around, they might take things a bit too far. Whether that’s saying something cruel or starting an argument when their feelings are hurt, people with zero chill can have a hard time keeping their cool. It’s a frustrating habit. It affects the people around them more than they realize.
Let’s be honest, when someone takes something too far, there is some truth to their words. If they’re making a cruel joke, it’s sad to know they likely believed what they were saying at least slightly. They may be seeking attention and are not afraid to cross a line to get it. It’s a frustrating habit they have developed.
8. They need constant validation
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When a person lacks chill, they could be dealing with some self-esteem issues. Because of this, they need constant validation. They want to know where they stand in your life. It could take the form of constant questions to see how you feel about them, or asking you to like their Instagram photos to show you care. It’s not an easy habit to manage when you are their friend.
Everyone wants to feel supported. Sometimes validation from our loved ones feels good. However, relying too much on validation from others can show that there is something deeper under the surface. They may have zero chill because they are struggling.
9. They are always in a rush
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We all have that one friend who is always running around. They have so much to do, and they are quick to tell you about it. While they are always rushing around, you may not understand why. They’re busy, but what are they doing? You may not even know. Having to work around their schedule because they have zero chill is difficult.
They may be dealing with time urgency. It could be a symptom of anxiety. Whatever the reason, people like this are always on the move, and they may want you to bend around their schedule.
10. They enjoy conflict
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Some people thrive under conflict. These people likely have no chill and are happy to ruffle feathers to engage with people. They may be willing to take their conflict further than the average person. They do not care who they hurt in the process. It’s a frustrating habit that leads to more harm than good.
They are likely seeking secondary gains. “Secondary gains are the upsides that people get from a behavior, even an unwanted behavior. For example, the upside to feeling victimized might be a self-imposed excuse to overeat or abuse alcohol. There are many secondary gains we get from any situation. Being aware of them is very important if you want to make positive changes,” says Cherilynn Veland, LCSW, MSW.
11. They are loud
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If someone has zero chill, you may hear them before you see them. They are not afraid to be loud. It can rub some people the wrong way. Their loudness can be a frustrating habit for some. Constant noise can be overwhelming for some. If someone has a hard time chilling out, you may expect them to be loud. They may want to be the biggest personality in the room.
Sometimes, loud people can make an experience overwhelming. If you’re easily frustrated by this, it’s not surprising that this person would get under your skin. They may be loud because they are excited, or they want to be the center of attention. Whatever the reason is, it’s okay to feel frustrated by the loudest voice in the room sometimes.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
