People Who Are Always Waiting For Something Bad To Happen Have Usually Had These 11 Sad Experiences
Firma V / Shutterstock Everyone goes through painful periods in their lives. While we may wish every day were filled with rainbows and unicorns, it just isn’t reality. We are always trying to find a balance between the good and the bad. For some, it may seem like only bad things happen to them.
Those who suffer from anticipation anxiety, or the assumption that something bad is always waiting for them around the corner, do not live easy lives. We have all found ourselves catastrophizing, imagining the worst-case scenarios. When people have endured trauma and stress, it can leave them feeling this way no matter what. They approach every situation with caution, waiting for something to go wrong. This behavior likely stems from the pain and suffering they endured previously. They have usually had certain sad experiences that alter their approach to life.
People who are always waiting for something bad to happen have usually had these 11 sad experiences
1. Prior trauma
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While we have all endured moments of difficulty, some have dealt with serious trauma. This can impact every aspect of their lives. Many are fearful of being put into that situation again. Whatever it was that hurt them left a lasting impression, and they are trying to avoid that experience for the rest of their lives. This can leave them assuming that something bad is always waiting for them around the corner.
Those who endure serious trauma may have constant thoughts of the situation, experience nightmares, and severe emotional distress. They can become avoidant, looking to remove themselves from any potentially dangerous situation. As a result, they are always waiting for something bad to happen because of the sad experience they had.
2. Grief
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Losing a person we love is one of the most difficult parts of life we are forced to endure. When someone is living through grief, it can seem like nothing good will ever happen again. It can seem like you’re drowning. People who are always waiting for something bad to happen have likely experienced grief. The feeling creeps up on them, leaving them fearful for it to happen again.
Larry Carlat described grief to Psychology Today as walking around with a hole in his heart. This pain can feel never-ending. It’s a sad experience that leaves a lasting impact.
3. Emotionally complex moments
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Emotionally complex moments can be different for everyone. Whether it was a traumatic relationship that left you second-guessing everything, or a problematic childhood that impacts every second of your adult life, times of complexity change our outlook on the future. We find ourselves on edge, waiting for the next terrible thing to happen. When our mental health is fragile from times of emotional strain, we are more susceptible to catastrophizing.
“Our current emotional and physical state is strongly impacted by our mental state,” Dr. Amy Mezulis told Verywell Mind. “When our mind is stuck on negative future events, it tends to make us feel more anxious or down. Catastrophizing also keeps us future-focused at the expense of being present-focused, making it difficult to be mindfully present in our real lives right now.”
4. Unpredictable environments
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Our childhood plays a pivotal role in how we react to situations as adults. Research shows that what occurs with your family of origin raises the risk of various issues later in life. If someone has experienced pain and suffering during their childhood, they may be left fearful of the future. Certain experiences will take them back to the sad ones they endured as a child. Instead of having an optimistic view towards life, they are always waiting for something bad to happen.
It’s not uncommon for people who grew up in unpredictable family environments to struggle with relaxation. Relaxing lowers our defenses. Instead of appreciating slow moments, they are always looking over their shoulders, fearful that their past sad experiences will happen again.
5. Chronic stress
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Does work drain your battery? Are you struggling to find time for yourself? The overwhelming feeling of stress can take a serious toll on our bodies. Our bodies respond to stress by trying to protect us from threats. It raises adrenaline, gets your heart beating faster, and makes you unable to relax.
It’s no surprise that people who deal with chronic stress are always waiting for something bad to happen. They are constantly on edge, fearful of the next thing that may happen and add to their already full plate. Chronic stress causes anxiety, which bleeds into their ability to relax and find peace in their daily lives. This is a sad experience that many of us deal with, and negatively impacts our ability to see the positives in life.
6. Lack of validation
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Although we may pretend we can live without it, validation matters. Starting in childhood, the way other people responded to our successes taught us confidence. Imagine you grew up in a home where your parents only pointed out the negativities they saw in you. You’ll be constantly placing yourself under a microscope, scared to mess up again. It’s a sad experience that leaves people always waiting for something bad to happen.
Emotional validation is important. It allows us to feel loved and supported. When we do not receive it, we will start to question everything. Instead of embracing the good things, these people may always be waiting for something bad to happen.
7. Unmet potential
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We are all guilty of placing too much pressure on ourselves. We expect perfection, or we get upset. Of course, we know that perfection is not accessible. We all make mistakes. However, when someone feels like they have not met their potential, it can cause them to catastrophize. They will wonder when the next bad thing will happen to them because they feel like a failure.
Expectations cloud our everyday reality. When we are constantly expecting the best out of ourselves and feel we are not achieving it, the unmet potential will take its toll on our mental health. Instead of having a positive outlook on life, people who feel they do not meet their potential will be waiting for another bad thing that affirms this belief.
8. Loss of hope
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Experiencing hopelessness is not only sad, but it is also debilitating. Feeling hopeless makes our everyday lives feel impossible. We are so used to dealing with negative things in these moments that we believe there will never be any improvement. This is a sad experience that makes seeing the good in things difficult. It’s no surprise that people who feel hopeless believe something bad is always just around the corner.
“Your brain might tell you that things are awful, horrible, and dreadful. It may try to convince you that you can’t succeed or tell you that there’s no chance things are going to get better,” says Amy Morin, LCSW, for Verywell Mind. “But just because you think it doesn’t mean it’s true. Your thoughts may be distorted, inaccurate, or downright wrong.” People who have experienced loss of hope sadly struggle to see the good in anything, even if their brains are lying to them.
9. Chronic illness or pain
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I deal with chronic pain, and it can be hard to feel anything but negativity when you are in the thick of it. I know that I am always on edge, that it will never get better. In fact, one of my biggest fears is that it will get worse. When I’m dealing with a flare-up, I am always on edge that something bad is going to happen. It’s a difficult experience.
Chronic pain and illness reinforce negative memories. We associate the pain with these dark, sick moments. It’s not uncommon to replay previous experiences of trauma while dealing with these moments of pain. This sad experience can leave those who suffer with pain and illness constantly waiting for something bad to happen, because they have endured it in the past.
10. Family troubles
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Have you been in a terrible romantic relationship? One where you endured abuse, whether physical or emotional? These sad experiences change our outlook on life. People dealing with this trauma will likely expect everything to go wrong for them because they have already dealt with so much. They are constantly waiting for something bad to happen.
Sometimes this attitude towards life starts before you have your own family. People who grew up in a negative environment are prone to stress, anxiety, and the thought that everyone around them is mad at them. This makes them feel like something bad is going to happen, no matter the circumstances.
11. Broken trust
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We have all had our trust broken at some point. It’s devastating. When you put your trust in someone you care about, and they let you down, it can be hard to bounce back from. When we lose trust, we become wary of other people. We are constantly thinking someone is going to hurt us again. It’s a sad experience that leaves us waiting for the next bad thing to happen.
“Research suggests that a lack of trust is often caused by social experiences. Relationships with family members and peers, for example, give us opportunities to trust and depend on the people close to us,” says Kendra Cherry, MSEd, for Verywell Mind. “When these people aren't trustworthy, or if we have an experience where our trust is repeatedly broken, we may end up feeling like the people around us are fundamentally unreliable.”
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
