If You Notice These 11 Things In Your Mom's Kitchen, She's More Overwhelmed Than She Says

A mom acts tough on the outside, but she may barely be keeping it together.

Written on Dec 02, 2025

adult daughter concerned for mom sitting in kitchen BearFotos | Shutterstock
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Moms are the backbone of the family. Known for their grace, wisdom, and nurturing nature, moms really do it all. From planning thoughtful birthday parties for the kids or keeping everyone's schedules organized, moms juggle so many things at once. But later in life, when it comes to her environment, she may secretly be struggling. And if you notice these certain things in your mom's kitchen, she's more overwhelmed than she says.

A lot of moms carry the burden of their family while receiving zero help in return. A mom will do all the household chores by herself, cook an entire meal, and balancing a full-time job too, rarely finding time for herself. Though many are taught that this is to be expected, the way she keeps her kitchen, specifically, can reveal quite a lot about her mental state.

If you notice these 11 things in your mom's kitchen, she's more overwhelmed than she says

1. A constantly full sink

woman looking at sink full of piling up dishes Erhan Inga | Shutterstock

Most mothers are completely overwhelmed. Balancing a job plus their kids, it isn't easy to keep a household in order. From cooking to keeping up with laundry, mothers must sacrifice and figure out what chores to save until later and what needs to be done right now. Of course, the more burned out a mother is, the less likely she is to follow through with things.

According to a study published in Frontiers in Public Health, long work hours tend to lead to less productivity, as a person is more prone to burnout. So, if you notice she hasn't taken care of the dishes in a while, help out. You wouldn't believe how many people pass by a dirty sink and don't take the initiative to clean it.

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2. New groceries sitting out for hours

woman smiling with husband unloading groceries bbernard | Shutterstock

If you notice groceries sitting out in your mom's kitchen, she's more overwhelmed than she says. When a mom gets home from a grueling day of work, and she needs to unload the groceries, the last thing on her mind is putting away the bags. And as her responsibilities pile up, they end up sitting out for hours.

No matter how easy moms make it look, it's difficult to do everything with little support and appreciation. Still, mothers continue to prioritize everyone else, leaving their smaller responsibilities to grow. Eventually, her list becomes so big that she forgets to do the smallest things, until she wakes up the next day and realizes the kitchen countertops are still full of grocery bags.

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3. Expired food

woman smelling expired food in moms fridge PeopleImages | Shutterstock

Depending on how busy a mom is, if you notice expired food she would have normally tossed out just lying around, she's clearly overwhelmed. She isn't trying to neglect her pantry or fridge, but she's got a lot on her mind. Between getting minimal sleep and needing to take care of the family, the last thing on her mind is checking an expiration date.

But while her feelings are valid, this is why having a good support group is so important. As a study published in the Korean Journal of Family Medicine found, better social support leads to more happiness. So, whether it's asking for babysitting services or to help organize the pantry, depending on loved ones should always be the standard.

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4. Appliances that have been broken for a while

adult woman unloading mom's broken dishwasher Andrey_Popov | Shutterstock

There's no worse feeling than wanting to cook on your stove or toast your bread, only to find out that your appliance has broken. With how expensive life has become, including new appliances, the last thing a mother wants is another unnecessary expense.

She won't ever tell her kids or her husband, but a mom is at her wits' end when her appliances have broken and stay that way. She's highly stressed and doesn't know who to rely on. It's not like she's trying to purposely ignore the microwave that no longer works, she's just trying to take life day by day.

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5. Convenient food items

older woman shopping at the grocery store Hryshachyshen Serhii | Shutterstock

As much as they'd love to sit there and make pasta or desserts from scratch, life tends to get in the way. She doesn't have the energy to cook anymore, so she may turn to microwaveable meals or something quick that takes no time at all. And if you notice these things in your mom's kitchen, she's more overwhelmed than she says.

Of course, this doesn't mean she doesn't feel terrible about it. After all, research has found that people who eat ultra-processed food are more likely to suffer from health problems, including higher BMI, blood pressure, and blood triglyceride levels.

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6. Forgotten cookware on the stove

blue pot on stove Kseniia Mnasina | Shutterstock

Life is busy when you're a mom. From waking up in the morning, getting the kids ready for school, working all day, and then needing to take care of business at home, it's easy to become forgetful. On the outside, these mothers look like they have it all together. However, their dishes are piled high, and they have cookware all over their stove.

Of course, they've been meaning to put it away. They don't want a messy kitchen that makes them less likely to cook. But they're likely too exhausted to remember that the cookware goes in the cabinets, not on the stove.

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7. A junk drawer

woman opening up a junk drawer brizmaker | Shutterstock

Nobody wants to have an unorganized home. As most people say, an unorganized home leads to unorganized thoughts. According to positive psychology coach Diane E Dreher, clutter is "a pattern of disorganization that can stress us out and undermine our home lives."

Still, she's trying her best. Even if her drawers aren't spotless, her home looks relatively decent and she managed to clean the bathroom. So as imperfect as her home may be, at the end of the day, a win is a win.

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8. A disorganized fridge

older woman looking sad in fridge Roy santi | Shutterstock

If you notice a disorganized or messy fridge in your mom's kitchen, she's more overwhelmed than she says. Of course, with people constantly in the fridge taking things in and out, it's easy for these high-traffic places to become a bit disorganized.

Many mothers do their best to keep it organized. Whether it's by having her kids organize it as a game or slowly cleaning it out once a week, she usually has a way to attack these issues. Yet, if she's overwhelmed and has zero support, you may notice her fridge becomes messier.

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9. An overflowing trash or recycling bin

woman tying up trash bag to throw out Pixel-Shot | Shutterstock

Moms have a list of responsibilities, and depending on how much help she has around the house, she may or may not be in charge of trash or recycling. She's trying to keep it together, but on top of everything else, she's barely got enough time for herself.

With nobody truly helping her around the house, it's safe to say that she's beyond stressed. Unfortunately, being overstressed can lead to an increase in blood pressure and cause her to develop depression or anxiety. So, if you can, always help out around her house. Even something small like taking the trash out takes a lot off her plate.

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10. Unfinished projects everywhere

couple painting home PeopleImages | Shutterstock

Every once in a blue moon, your mom may have the energy to do something dramatic to her kitchen. Whether it's painting the cabinets or replacing the knobs, she's doing her research. However, when it comes time to get her project finished, suddenly her energy is zapped.

Yes, she wants to finish her projects and make her home prettier. However, she doesn't have a lot of motivation. Between getting little sleep and receiving no help or encouragement, she's completely abandoned her home improvement goals. To avoid this, help her out, even if it's only for an hour.

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11. Seasonal decor that's still out

adult woman sitting in moms living room with off season decor out voronaman | Shutterstock

Your mom probably put in a lot of work to make her kitchen welcoming. But when the season or holiday is over, she leaves the decorations out. And there's no sign of change in sight. While it's tempting to roll your eyes and blame it on laziness, burnout is a real thing. As psychologist Sherrie Bourg Carter explained, "Burnout is a state of chronic stress that leads to exhaustion, detachment, feelings of ineffectiveness."

Typically, kitchen decorations don't take a while to put away. So, help your mom and set a timer for 30 minutes, help out as much as you can in putting the seasonal decorations away, and allow her to relax for a moment.

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Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.

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