The Art Of Being A Nice Person: 6 Simple Habits Of Naturally Nice People
Being nice should not be conflated with being a people-pleaser.
Getty Images | Unsplash Kids who play nicely with others grow up and often become the type of person who is highly recommended. People definitely want to hang out with the naturally nice person again and again because they walk away feeling better about themselves and the world in general.
Truly nice people don't perform goodness — they live it. Their natural warmth feels effortless, and somehow, they manage to make everyone around them feel a little lighter. The genuinely kind have an instinctual way of brightening a room without trying too hard, and connecting deeply with people without forcing things. Nice people are the world's soft places to land.
Here are the six simple habits of naturally nice people:
1. They have empathy that flows both inward and outward
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Marriage coach Susan Allan realizes that because the world is such a complicated environment for almost everyone, in order to stay nice, which indicates peacefulness and empathy for others, and empathy for oneself. We need to maintain the habit of self-soothing whenever it is required.
Just as angry people, cruel people, and nasty people are clearly miserable and lack the skills to alter their brain chemistry. Those who are nice may be blessed with more serotonin, dopamine, or endorphins. However, it is a commitment and a focus on mental health and positive communication that allows them to be so nice to everyone under any circumstances.
2. They are quick to smile, and even quicker to laugh
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Humor is probably one of the most useful habits of truly nice people, as it allows them to see beyond their own situations, explains personal development coach Jan Bowen. Kind people see the humor and irony in situations, without the snarkiness and meanness others typically show.
Life is funny, and these awesome people know that sometimes the best gift you can give someone is just helping them laugh and lighten up. Dropping a witty comment at just the right moment, they are masters of light-hearted comedy. And the best part is that they aren't afraid to laugh at themselves.
3. They do the right thing just because it's who they are
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Therapist Gloria Brame, Ph.D., says a naturally nice person isn't someone who turns on the politeness or charm when other people are watching. They are consistently polite, friendly, and decent without doing it to raise their social capital.
We've all encountered performative niceness. I worked for someone years back who kissed their boss's behind in every way, then turned around and treated everyone lower on the corporate ladder than themselves as inferiors. You've no doubt seen media personalities who constantly talk about their good deeds and commitment to social causes, only to be revealed as someone who underpaid and abused staff members. They are only nice in public as a strategy to maintain a beautiful image.
Genuinely nice people don't calculate who deserves their courtesy or kindness. Their niceness is who they are, not a show they're putting on. That authenticity is what makes people trust them and want them in their lives.
4. They make others feel human
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Author Leah Njoki clearly breaks down how genuinely nice people excel at simple everyday interactions for specific reasons.
- They cover the blunders of others and make them feel human by transcending the pettiness of social circles.
- In social gatherings, they make others shine by helping them find their conversation balance.
- They’re straight shooters when asking for favors, making it easy for the favor-giver to respond without guilt.
Genuinely nice people aren’t necessarily unique from you. What sets them apart are some key qualities that you, too, can easily develop. Start now.
5. They leave things better than they found them
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When I think of a kind-hearted, pure soul, my mind goes to someone like Jane Goodall, says humanities and lifestyle writer Haley Van Horn. Goodall wanted to make a difference in the world, not for herself. She made me want to be a better person. We all have people we idolize who show up for others without looking for anything in return. They are the people who make the world a better place.
When someone has a pure heart and a kind soul, they always want to lift others. They don’t believe in intentionally hurting people. It’s easy for them to see the good in others so that they can provide them with support and kindness. When they accidentally hurt someone’s feelings, it hits them hard. They will be endlessly apologetic.
6. They assume the best of people
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Astrologer Aria Gmitter knows that a naturally nice person treats you with dignity and respect regardless of the circumstances you are in. They make you feel important when in their presence, and you almost sense that your value is above their own in that moment. When you meet someone who is naturally nice for the first time, they assume the best in you and truly enjoy your presence.
They are cordial even during slights of disrespect to strangers in public, and you feel no sense of anger because they inherently sense that problems are temporary, and what matters is the impression left behind. A naturally nice person carries themselves with poise, and their refinement is extended to you.
They talk a little bit slower to hear what you have to say and savor the pauses. They respect your ideas and opinions, even using laughter or humor to show delight in how you've expressed your individual mind. They are the people in the world who shine brightly in a room, and people are drawn to them because of the comfort their aura radiates. You not only want to be around someone who is naturally nice, but you also feel emotionally restored.
Will Curtis is YourTango's expert editor. Will has over 14 years of experience as an editor covering relationships, spirituality, and human interest topics.
