11 Phrases Men Who Don't Deserve Their Woman Say Way Too Often
If you hear any of these phrases, he doesn’t deserve you.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock One of the most striking things about the modern dating world is how often the worst men seem to end up with the most wonderful women. It’s often mind-boggling. In many cases, it’s a result of men pretending to be decent people until they feel they have the woman under their control. In other cases, it’s a matter of a woman who doesn’t know how bad she has it.
Regardless of how the awful guys get the girl, they all tend to sound the same after a while. If you hear any of these phrases, it’s time to get outta Dodge City and back to Singletown.
Here are 11 phrases men who don't deserve their woman say way too often
1. ‘That’s your job’
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Oh no, honey.
If you ever hear a man tell you that dishes, housekeeping, or childcare is “your job,” you’re not with the right man. A healthy relationship is 50/50, and that means you should expect your partner to pitch in whenever you’re overwhelmed with work or in need of help.
Men who think that housework is for women and women only are not good partners. At least one study revealed that one in every four couples divorce over chores. Skip the divorce. Dump him while you’re dating.
2. ‘You’re going to wear that in public?’
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One of the key moves of an abusive, insecure bully is the choice to control what their partner wears. What’s wild is that the man in question often falls for the girl because she is as vibrant as she is—and then he slowly chips away at that because he’s afraid of her leaving.
The ladies at BondiBeauty are right. If he starts controlling what you wear, he’s going to start trying to control other things. It’s not a good sign and suggests that your partner will start getting more controlling and abusive as days pass.
3. ‘You’re so much better at this than I am, so why don’t you do it?’
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This is yet another classic line from men who are experienced in the art of weaponized incompetence. When a man says this, it’s not a compliment. It’s a cop-out to get out of doing chores he’s very capable of doing.
Coddling an adult baby is no way to go through life. You deserve better than that.
4. ‘Marriage is just a piece of paper. A baby and a home? That’s forever’
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Ooh, if there is one thing that grinds my gears more than anything else, it’s a man who is happy to accept a woman working to build him up without offering her the commitment she wants.
This is known as “future faking,” and the idea is simple: get as much work and money out of a woman as possible without giving her a ring in return. It’s done by men who generally don’t like the women they’re with, often with a relationship that started out with them fully gung-ho on marriage. Do not give this man the time of day. He’ll never commit.
5. ‘You’re going to have to convince me that you’re worth committing to’
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This is one of the most toxic, venomous things a man can say to a woman. It’s a phrase that is supposed to immediately make a woman devalue herself, beg for his love, and worse. In other words, it’s manipulative and fairly emotionally abusive.
Rather than play his game, get up and leave when he says this. It will throw him for a loop and will give you time to pick yourself back up.
6. ‘If only you would do as I ask, I wouldn’t do this to you’
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Did you ever notice how so many abusive men keep saying that women are the reason they do awful things? It’s always some kind of spin on, “Look what you made me do,” when in reality, he had every capability to not hit a woman.
No amount of back-bending, no amount of submission, and no amount of “Yes, dear’s” will even truly satisfy an abusive man. They’re like black holes, forever consuming women.
7. ‘You’re so emotional’
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Almost every woman has heard this phrase from a man, and almost none of those statements had any love behind them. This is a phrase used by abusive men who want to tamp down on women actually raising their voice to them.
In other words, it’s a statement that minimizes the damage they’re doing. Being called “overly emotional” is a way of just excusing women for being upset when they’re being disrespected. That’s not okay.
8. ‘It was an accident’
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This is a phrase that often pops up after a man cheats on a girl and gets caught doing it. It’s suddenly “an accident,” and something that she should forgive because he normally would never do that.
The problem is, it’s hard to accidentally kiss someone or accidentally leave tawdry messages on their phone. NEXT!
9. ‘Sorry I forgot your anniversary/birthday/Valentine’s Day gift’
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Most women work themselves to the bone for the men in their lives, whether it’s through cleaning, making sure the kids are okay, or providing for them. There are only a couple of times a year when a woman wants to really have time to herself and feel appreciated.
If you managed to forget your anniversary, her birthday, or a similarly woman-centric holiday, you’re in deep trouble. If you do it multiple times? It’s just blatant disrespect. A woman would be right to assume you don’t deserve her if this is a habit. (And ladies? Dump him if he does this to you on a regular basis. He’s not worth it.)
10. What, you want some type of fairytale romance?’
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For reasons beyond my understanding, a lot of men don’t take pride in being able to sweep women off their feet. Being able to romance their way into a woman's heart used to be a major flex of men, but that's no longer the case.
It’s awfully entitled for men to expect women to swoon over them when they put zero effort into trying to make them feel good. If you’re dealing with a guy like this, he’s not worth calling back.
11. ‘Women are only after money’
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Oh, this is rich. In a growing number of families, women are the main breadwinners, not men. So, if men are whining about golddiggers, maybe it’s time they look in the mirror.
A good rule of thumb for single ladies is to get up, pay the bill, and leave the table the moment a man says this. The same applies to its corollary, the classic, “What do you bring to the table?”
If he couldn’t figure that out, he probably should reexamine why he asked you out.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, Newtheory Magazine, and others.
