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Woman Who Spent 31 Years Grieving Her Father Stumbles Across His Active Facebook Profile

Photo: @sharnee.xo / TikTok 
woman, long lost father

A woman who believed her father to be dead for over three decades was shocked one day when she stumbled across him on Facebook. 

The two struck up a conversation and are certain that they are father and daughter. 

Now, they are hoping to meet up in person to make up for the lost time. 

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The woman was told by her family that her biological father had passed away. 

31-year-old Sharnee from New Zealand had gone through her whole life thinking she’d never meet her father since he was supposedly dead. 

Although one day, a small spark of hope fueled her to conduct some research and discover if her father really was long-gone. 

Using physical descriptors given to her by her mother and many late nights of endless research, Sharnee was able to track down a man on social media that matched her father’s description. 

She decided to message the man on Facebook to uncover the burning question if she was really his daughter. 

She posted a screen recording of their entire conversation on TikTok, which has since gained over 14 million views. 

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The interaction between Sharnee and the man she found on Facebook proved that he was in fact her father. 

“This is exactly how I found my dad…after being told he was unalive for all of my 31 years,” she wrote in the text overlay at the beginning of her video. 



Their conversation begins with Sharnee asking the man about his whereabouts around the time of her conception. 

“Hi, this is a random question and [I] apologize for intruding. Did you travel to New Zealand in 1990?” she writes. 

Shockingly, the man responds! “Hiya. How you doing? And yes I lived there twice Sharnee. Who are you?” he replies. 

She asks him if he’s ever lived in her hometown of Christchurch, which he confirmed he had. 

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“This is going to sound super odd and very personal, but I need to ask,” Sharnee warns. 

“When you were living in Christchurch/ New Zealand did you sleep with any women? My mother, who I dearly and deeply love has given me your name so I’ve done years and years and years of research and you fit all of these descriptions…I’m so very sorry that this all seems very strange!” she writes. 

While the man admits that the question is a lot for him, he is intrigued by what Sharnee shared with him and asks where she was from so that they could begin putting the pieces together more clearly. 

Her mother had apparently told her that when she and her father were together he left New Zealand to attend a football match in the U.K. and she never heard from him again and presumed him to be dead. 

“I’ve been looking for my father for a very very very long time. I’m not even sure you are, but you definitely could be,” she writes. 

However, the man provides clarity that he is indeed Sharnee’s father after revealing personal details about her mother that only he and she would know including her name, birthday, and the name of her other son. 

“I’m shaking, I’m crying. I’ve been waiting for this moment for a very long time,” she admits. 

The man explains that while he and her mother bumped into each other in town often, they were never really dating. He also claimed that he had no knowledge of his daughter’s existence. 

The two were absolutely astonished that they found each other and were able to converse via Facebook. 

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Sharnee has started a fundraiser page to raise money to allow her to meet her father. 

On the page titled, “Help me meet my dad,” she shares that all of the proceeds will go toward DNA testing for her and her father to confirm their biological relationship and travel expenses that will allow them to meet in person. 

“I need to meet this man, do DNA with this man, and start making memories with this man,” Sharnee wrote on her page.  “I have young children that could be his grandchildren, he has other children that could be my siblings.” 

As of now, over $2,700 has been raised over the last four weeks. 

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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.