11 Behaviors Of People Who Grew Up Poor That Are Obvious No Matter How Much Money They Have Now
Some things stick with you for life.
Ground Picture / Shutterstock While it’s true that children who grew up in poverty are more likely to experience the same as adults, the generational cycle of financial uncertainty and instability is often rooted in behaviors and mentalities, rather than simply income level or opportunity. Many of the behaviors of people who grew up poor that are obvious no matter how much money they have now are representative of these things, from a scarcity mindset to a lack of financial literacy.
All of our realities later in life are influenced by our upbringing. Whether it was watching our parents’ relationship or overhearing their conversations about difficulties with money, it’s impossible to avoid the link between how someone was raised and their current experiences navigating life, money, and general well-being, and other people notice it too.
Here are 11 behaviors of people who grew up poor that are obvious, no matter how much money they have now
1. Opting for public transportation
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According to an investigative study from Safe Routes, it’s most often impoverished communities that struggle to maintain safe and accessible infrastructure, from safe sidewalks to pedestrian-friendly roads. So, in adulthood, if they have the opportunity to move to a city where the infrastructure promotes, or even celebrates, walking or using public transportation, they’re going to use it.
Of course, for many people, it also cuts down on the costs of owning a vehicle. If you live in a walkable city or have access to affordable public transportation, you can save money by choosing to use it, rather than purchasing a car and keeping up with its maintenance.
Even if they have the freedom to purchase a car, they may not in these situations, even if a person from a wealthier background would always choose to avoid the perceived inconveniences of public transportation.
2. Fixing things instead of hiring someone
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From fixing household repairs like a broken AC unit or a leaky faucet, doing it themselves is one of the behaviors of people who grew up poor that are obvious no matter how much money they have now. They grew up in households where their parents didn’t have the freedom to hire someone, so they either learned or taught themselves those skills.
Even if it only saves them money on labor, it’s more of a mindset than a practice of spending. They’d prefer to do it themselves and invest in knowledge, rather than offloading responsibility onto others. A study from the Family Relations journal also suggests that kids who grew up in poverty learn how to be independent much earlier than their affluent counterparts, both from a personal and financial perspective, which bolsters their self-reliance and skillset into adulthood.
3. Reusing and recycling
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Whether it’s fixing their worn clothing, saving plastic bags, returning cans, or regifting, reusing, and recycling, are some of the behaviors of people who grew up poor that are obvious no matter how much money they have now. They understand the fragility of financial security and comfort, so they’re intentional about saving money in little ways when they can.
These small habits are also rooted in the scarcity mindset that many adults who grew up poor developed. They don’t view their money as a tool that can buy them abundance or convenience, but rather as something that can be easily lost and therefore protected.
4. Budgeting necessities to the penny
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Many people who grew up poor were forced to learn budgeting and intentional spending at home because their parents pinched pennies to afford basic necessities like rent or groceries. It’s these seemingly subtle experiences from their upbringing that are profoundly intertwined into their health and well-being, which is why they tend to follow adult children later in life, no matter how much money they have now.
It’s part of the reason why they also tend to be highly aware of prices and spending in places like the grocery store. They watched their parents debate over everything in the cart, coupons to save money, and plan out when they’d buy certain things, so they inherently feel skilled to do the same now.
5. Feeling uncomfortable talking about money
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Whether it’s planning a trip with their close friends or talking about salaries with co-workers, many people who grew up poor struggle to overcome an internalized sense of shame they developed around money early in life. While the situations and experiences that developed this shame may seem innocent, like not having the newest toy or the coolest winter coat on the playground, it can have profound effects later in life.
Poverty is an experience that stays with you for life, even if you become affluent or financially comfortable as an adult, which is why many adults today still feel uncomfortable talking about money. They were taught to avoid conversations about money with parents who kept their poverty a secret or even prompted feelings of fear and anxiety around spending, which is a hard emotion and feeling to unlearn.
6. Never accepting financial favors
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Accepting financial favors or money from people can be uncomfortable and even anxiety-inducing for adults who grew up in poverty. Like the book “Poverty and Shame: Global Experiences” highlights, the experience of poverty isn’t solely focused on financial literacy and money, but a vast, nuanced conversation of shame, fear, guilt, and embarrassment.
By accepting other people’s money or gifts, even if they accept nothing in return, many of these adults feel a sense of obligation, burden, or dependency that threatens their sense of independence and self-reliance, the very same tools that allowed them to cope with financial insecurity as kids.
7. Only making big purchases when they’re on sale
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Many adults who grew up in poverty were taught to only purchase things when they were on sale. Any kind of coupon, loyalty card, or tactic for saving money was better than buying something at full price. It’s this mentality that not only fuels their spending habits, but also many rituals in their daily lives, like shopping at thrift stores and buying marked-down groceries.
While the average person may simply buy what they need, even if it’s a bit impulsive at times, regardless of the cost, saving, using coupons, and planning out spending for these purchases are some of the behaviors of people who grew up poor that are obvious, no matter how much they spend.
8. Keeping leftovers
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Even if they have the money to buy groceries, go out to eat, and repurchase food they won’t eat, stretching meals and keeping leftovers are behaviors of people who grew up poor that never really go away.
They’re either stuck in survival mode or in a scarcity mindset that urges them to believe they’re losing money or sabotaging their financial freedom by wasting food, groceries, or money. Even if the people around them aren’t doing the same, they’re going to clean their plates, save their leftovers, and stretch their groceries out for as long as possible.
9. Being stingy with the thermostat
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Whether it’s keeping their AC off during the summer or cultivating a frigid house in the winter, being stingy over the thermostat is one of the behaviors of people who grew up poor that is obvious, no matter how much money they have now. It’s a matter of convenience. People who grew up in affluent households are always chasing comfort and convenience, while those from impoverished ones live in survival mode.
If they can protect their perceived financial security by saving a couple of dollars a week on utilities and electricity, they don’t mind sacrificing a bit of their comfort at home to do so.
10. Avoiding debt
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According to a Meridian study, 55% of people say that the money struggles they faced growing up still negatively impact them today, whether it’s a fear of debt, an internalized shame about money, or being in a state of constant survival.
From credit card debt to student loans and personal financing on large purchases, people who grew up in poverty are far more sensitive and intentional about avoiding debt, even if it means forgoing purchases like a home or a new car that others would buy without reservation. They often don’t have a safety net to fall back on, so they’d prefer to save their money and avoid debt rather than spend on luxuries and convenience.
11. Offering help to others
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People who grew up poor and experienced the struggle of financial hardship firsthand are often the most gracious and helpful, especially financially, when they grow up. They’re always willing to help others, whether it’s a stranger experiencing homelessness or one of their close friends, whether they have the financial freedom to do so or not.
Like a study from the Emotion journal suggests, people from low-income backgrounds are quicker to show compassion and lead with empathy than their affluent counterparts. They know the struggle, but they also know how powerful a helping hand can be, even if it’s something small.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
