The 2 Words That Prevent You From Attracting High-Quality Men

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looking for love

I had an interesting exchange about how to attract men after posting on my Facebook profile the other morning.

Here’s what I wrote: "I'm allergic to the words 'look' and 'keep' when it comes to men… Excited about showing elite goddesses around the world how to easily attract a successful, quality man & have him commit quickly!" 

Someone contacted me to clarify what I meant when I used these terms, and here is how the conversation went: 

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Andy: What do "look" and "keep" mean concerning men?

Me: Ahh, well Andy, we ladies are conditioned to think and say “I'm looking for a good man” or ask, “How do I keep a man?” Both (have) weak energy. A great man is attracted & he also wants to stay with you.

Andy: I always thought it was we men who pursue you ladies. I guess if the man is rich it might be different since he has what she wants. But the average man usually does the pursuing.

Me: There are all kinds of wrong things with that thinking, Andy. In fact, you’ve just inspired a video. Must work with a client now, but I will get back to you on this…

So what’s the lesson here, when it comes to attracting men? Where should you start if you want to get a great guy to like you — and stop looking for love at last?

Well, there are at least seven lessons in there (including the whole “if the man is rich” bit), but we're going to start with three basic ones.

Here are three ways that the words "look" and "keep" might be stopping you from attracting quality men — and cause you to eternally be "looking for love":

1. Understand how to speak from your feminine power.

What you say is what you get. If you’re always focusing on “looking, searching, and finding” a quality man, you’re actually repelling him.

As a woman, you naturally have the energy that a high-quality man is drawn to. You may have heard of the Chinese concept of Yin and Yang. They are opposite energies that balance each other.

A man who is seeking and hunting for you (in yang energy) is open to seeing and receiving yin energy. Yin is all things feminine and sensual —  everything that he isn't!

So while Andy doesn’t realize it consciously, he gets it. Notice he said, “I always thought it was we men who pursue you ladies.”  Yep! He’s right, in part. However, he doesn’t just “think” it’s instinct, in his DNA. While men seek out and pursue women, women are also actively attracting men to them, as well.

This requires a balance, just like Yin and Yang. It's important for women to speak what they truly desire to have and happen, so don't just "look" — attract!

  • Instead of “I am looking for…” use “I am attracting…”
  • Instead of asking “Where are the quality men?” or “Are there any left?” ask yourself “Where can I go to meet quality men?”

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At this point, you may be thinking, “Rhonda, what about being a strong, decisive woman? You always talk about that.”

Yes, I do. You see, each woman has several personalities or characters inside. All are needed and one isn’t less important than the other.

Men are drawn to Princess Fiona, yet they adore it when her inner Xena Warrior Princess comes out. Confused? No need to be. It’s the same way with men. They have a feminine and masculine side  some more than others, but it’s there. Whether he just embraces and lives it out is another story.

2. Understand the meaning of "attract."

Andy is not alone in being confused as to what the word "attract" truly means. Gosh, the word is thrown around so much that I’m not surprised he is. So let’s look at that now…


verb \?-?trakt\

Definition of attract: to cause to approach or adhere; 
a : to pull to or draw toward oneself or itself <a magnet attracts iron> 
b : to draw by appeal to natural or excited interest, emotion, or aesthetic sense: entice <attract attention>

Wow! That’s powerful. 

Do you see, feel or hear any weak energy in those definitions? Can’t you feel the power stirring up in you right now? What you put out into the world is what you'll bring back. Make sure you're only working on attracting people that will be good for you!

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3. Understand all that you do attract.

Most women don’t know this, but we are natural attractors. We are all born with the ability to attract. It’s just that most of us are unaware of how to use that power.

  • You can cause a man to approach you.
  • You can draw a man to you.
  • You can appeal to men naturally.
  • You can excite a man’s interest.
  • You can evoke strong emotion in a man.

Not only can you attract just any man… but you can also attract the type or quality of man you want!

You can:

  • Attract an amazing, high-quality man… or attract jerks.
  • Attract a faithful, honest man… or attract a cheating, lying man.
  • Attract an attentive man… or attract a man who takes you for granted.
  • Attract a man who treats you like a queen… or a man who abuses you.

We all attract. We also attract the type of man who pursues us, as I wrote above. This is one of the hardest things for a lot of women to accept.

When we’re in a victim mindset, we say men do things “to” us. I’m going to tread carefully here. I say this with all respect for any pain and suffering you may have gone through — verbal, emotional, and physical abuse alike… I, too, was in an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship many years ago.

However, until I stopped thinking like a victim and realized I had a choice, nothing changed.

Here’s another compelling, outside-the-box thought…

Sometimes, at both ends of the spectrum, we could be talking about the same man.

You see this all the time. It’s so cliché, but it’s true. How many instances have we seen of a famed playboy woman who could not “tame” (for lack of a better word) all of a sudden — after leaving a 7-mile-long path of broken hearts — goes ga-ga over a plain woman?

Everyone is so shocked, awed, and dismayed. Why? They just don’t understand the influence of a woman in her full power.

While outward beauty can attract more men — when it comes to inspiring him to stay, it’s a whole different story. If we only understood just how powerful nature created us. Just how powerful would we all be?

I am on a mission to unleash that very power in a special group of elite women worldwide right now. Are you one of them?

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Rhonda Cort is a relationship expert and go-to person on how to be a high-value woman in relationships, business, and life.