Women With A High Level Of Self-Respect Don't Tolerate These 7 Behaviors From Men, According To Psychology
Women who know their worth won't put up with these signs of disrespect.
Tim Mossholder | Unsplash You're spending time with this amazing guy, and you're thrilled he's interested in you. Sometimes you wish it were more than just friends, but for now, you'll take his attention as it comes. You treasure every moment you get with him, but once in a while, you get this nagging feeling that he's subtly disrespecting you.
He's told you clearly that he doesn't want to be in a relationship, but while you may not see him consistently, when you do, it's fantastic. The good news if there are at least seven signs you can watch for that indicate a man is not giving you the respect you deserve. They might be hard to hear, but if you’ve been kidding yourself, this is the way to find out where you stand — and have enough self-respect to leave.
Women with a high level of self-respect don't tolerate these 7 behaviors from men, according to psychology:
1. He already has a girlfriend
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Whether you met him before or after he got his girlfriend, he complains about how she treats him. Maybe she's mean or too demanding. Whatever the problem is, it drives him to seek you out, which often leads to spending the night together.
When a man complains about his girlfriend to another woman, he might be engaging in emotional triangulation, using the third person to avoid confronting issues directly within his relationship. A 2022 study concluded that this can create unhealthy dynamics and place an unfair burden on the woman being confided in.
You feel so badly for him and can't imagine how she could be like that. But the trouble is, that's not the right question for you to be asking yourself.
What you need to know is why he needs to talk about his problems with you rather than fix them with her? And why is he sleeping with you (or anyone else) outside of their relationship? Most often, this happens because he's a player type who seems like a nice guy, but is he?
2. He's hot and cold
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When your male friend is “on,” you hear from him often. The texting and calls are fun, and he wants to see you.
Then he gets busy and whoosh — he disappears like a puff of smoke. The weeks drag on, and even if you text him, he might ignore you or text back that he's super busy right now, asking you to be patient with him.
Then out of nowhere, he shows up like he was never away. No explanation and no apology, He just picks up where he left off. Things are great again like before, but you start wondering how long it will last and when he'll disappear again.
One study argued that inconsistent behavior prevents the development of trust, intimacy, and a secure attachment between partners. Women with high self-respect are more likely to establish and maintain clear boundaries, communicating their needs and expectations assertively.
3. He's never free to see you on weekends
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The first time you met might have been on a weekend, but since then, he has never been free on a Saturday night. It seems like he can only see you during the week, maybe even only on certain days.
If this is happening, know that he just wants to get you into bed, and you are accepting these relationship crumbs because you don't value yourself enough.
A man who genuinely cares for you would be available to you on weekends as well, instead of seeing the other woman he must prefer on Saturday nights. Don't put up with this kind of disrespectful treatment!
4. He stays in touch, but doesn't make time to see you
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He is really good about keeping in touch, and you love that about him. He's always texting during the day and into the night. Your conversations are fun, and sometimes they get pretty deep, too.
The problem is that he's so darn busy, you rarely see him. He talks a lot about taking you out, but he never does. It wasn't always like this, but now this seems to be the norm. Sometimes you send naughty texts, but it's been a while since you've spent time together in person.
This is a heads-up that he's not serious about you. This is not how one friend treats another. He's most likely stringing you along.
Being strung along, or "breadcrumbing," can lead to confusion, frustration, and emotional distress, negatively impacting mental health. It can even increase the risk of developing anxiety and depression symptoms, one study concluded.
5. He only texts you late at night
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You love having a male friend and being part of his life. Yet, this new habit of his, texting you at 10:00 p.m. and wanting to see you, makes you wonder.
Come to think of it, he never takes you out on dates anymore. Maybe he never did, and you've always seen him at your place. Whatever the case, it may be starting to dawn on you that he's just using you, and that's not a good feeling at all.
6. He asks for favors but rarely reciprocates
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Being this guy's friend is such a blast. You're having the best time with him, laughing at the same stuff and texting all sorts of things. The two of you have so much in common, you can't believe it.
You value his friendship, so when he started asking you to do him some favors here or there, you went ahead and did them. That's what friends do, right?
But as time goes by, he seems to ask you for more and more favors. When you think about it, he only reaches out when he wants something from you.
This seems sort of one-sided. You rarely ask him for help with anything, and when you do, he's too busy to squeeze helping you out into his schedule.
Maybe a little resentment builds up (for good reason), and you start to question if he just wants you for "that one thing" plus a few extra favors that make his life easier. According to a 2019 study, the mutual exchange of support and effort is crucial for healthy relationships, whether romantic, platonic, or familial.
7. He pours his heart out, then rushes off
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It blows your mind the things your male friend will tell you about himself and his life. He has opened up to you, and you think he must like and trust you to share so deeply about private matters.
Happy to be supportive, you listen intently and offer him your wisdom. It makes you feel proud that you are always there for him as a good friend. In a way, you even feel a little bit honored that he's chosen you as his confidante.
The thing is, he spills his guts, sharing whatever is on his mind and then rushing off to something else. This leaves you curious about what he thinks about you and what you mean to him.
You deserve a balanced, enriching relationship with reciprocity. That means whatever you do for a guy, he returns the favor. Maybe not in the same way, but at least you won't be the only one giving.
You aren't some consolation prize — you deserve a genuine, loving relationship. If you want friendship with him, fine, then stick to friendship. If you want a relationship, stop barking up the wrong tree because he either has a woman in his life or doesn't want a committed relationship.
When you have healthy boundaries and feel confident, you walk away from people who are selfish and self-absorbed. Knowing you deserve to be treated well, appreciated, and cherished allows you to move on and look for a better man with whom you can enjoy the kind of loving relationship you dream of and deserve.
Ronnie Ann Ryan is an Intuitive Coach, Past Life Reader, and author of six books. She’s the creator of the free audio course How to Ask the Universe for a Sign and Get an Answer Within 24 Hours and the host of the popular metaphysical podcast Breathe Love & Magic. She's been published on ABC, BBC, and NPR.
