5 Types Of Trust That Make Couples Feel Safe, Bonded And Madly In Love
Love isn't just about chemistry, it's about building the trust you need to feel safe, close, and truly in love.
PeopleImages | Canva If you want a fulfilling marriage, you must know how to create this kind of trust. Most couples think of trust exclusively in terms of being faithful, which is essential, but there's more to the definition of trust than just cheating.
Strong, healthy marriages reveal five specific kinds of trust husbands and wives give one another. So, we suggest you go over the following list and check which kinds of trust you bring (or do not bring) into your marriage. Ask your spouse to do the same and share your results. This is an excellent way to clarify where your trust is solid and where it needs work.
Here are 5 types of trust that make couples feel safe, bonded, and madly in love:
1. Trust that you'll both stay faithful
Without fidelity, many marriages become unworkable. Partners can recover from cheating or an affair, but need professional help to do it. Keep your commitment to remain faithful. If you're unhappy in your marriage, get counseling, not a part-time lover.
Trust in relationships is reciprocal, as shown by a study in The Journal of Social Psychology. "Assessments of trust in intimate relationships are often based on perceptions of a partner's behaviors; however, people's actions, increased self-awareness, and individual differences may also affect their trust in their partners. The participants' trusting behaviors significantly determined their level of trust; heightened self-awareness and a communal orientation further enhanced the participants' trust in their partners."
2. Trust that you'll never hurt, reject, or control each other
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Trust thrives in an atmosphere of safety and security. Hurting one another, either physically or verbally, and then rejecting one another, creates fear, which undermines trust. With control comes mistrust, so make sure your love is not filled with a lot of possessive clinging, which pushes your partner away.
3. Trust that your love is genuine, not for show or gain
You and your spouse need to feel sure you're loved for yourself and not for some ulterior motive. That includes your looks, your money, your family, or any other comparison-based motives. You and your partner don't need someone to feel superior to or be a buffer against being alone and lonely.
4. Trust that you won't abandon each other during conflict
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Anger, conflict, and disagreements are inevitable. Make it safe for the careful expression of anger and for disagreements to happen without raising fear of abandonment. You do this by never using the threat of divorce against your partner.
Threats of ending the relationship might sound like a cry for help from the one making the threat, but the impact will set off a chain reaction of thoughts and behavioral responses in the threatened spouse, as explored by a 2012 study.
5. Trust that your relationship will always come first
Partners trust they mean it when they promise to love, honor, and cherish one another. Don't take each other for granted, neglect your relationship, or consistently give too much time and energy to different things and people, and you break that trust.
Remember every day what is important in your life. Keep your priorities clear. Make your partner and your marriage a top priority. Just keep choosing each other, and everything else will fall into place.
