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They're simple but effective.
By Ronnie Ann Ryan — Last updated on Oct 09, 2022
You meet someone new and develop a major crush. Hanging out, flirty texting and FaceTiming with them is sweet and funny and you find them amazingly attractive.
Before you turn up the heat, there are things you may want to know to help you determine if this prospect could actually be the romantic partner of your dreams.
There are probably a million questions running through your mind, but you can't ask them all. So, which questions should you ask your crush?
Curiosity varies with each individual since people have different priorities. However, there are some basic things everyone wants to know and others that are more personal to your own needs or mindset.
As you consider how to gather the essential deets about your future lover, it's important to remember this vital fact: While you're judging others to see if they meet your standards, they're also judging you.
If you rush in with a series of invasive questions, you may run off your suitor. Yes, you should absolutely pre-screen for red flags, but there's an easier way.
Shift your focus on making a good first impression. That's a heck of a lot easier to do when having a more relaxed conversation.
It's likely that loaded questions may make your crush feel triggered and defensive. They don't want to think about an ex while meeting you — and you don't want that either.
You'd be far better off finding out how they like to spend their free time, what books or movies they enjoy, and where they traveled on their last vacation. These questions are more pleasant to answer and allow passions and preferences to show.
Top priority questions to ask your crush
1. "Are you single?"
Yes, this is worth asking because there are people in open relationships or marriages, looking for extracurricular activities.
2. "Do you live and work locally?"
It's a lot easier to date someone who lives and works locally. When your date lives or works out of town, coordination can become a problem and many things can get in the way of getting together.
Be smart and make your love life easier — date local.
3. "Do we have anything in common?"
You don't need to be like twins and love all the same activities. Yet, a like few of the same things can indict you may be good together.
Maybe you have a similar background or interest in art which would be wonderful common ground.
4. "What's your idea of fun?"
There are countless ways to enjoy life and if you both like to ski, go to the beach or enjoy learning about history or cultures, that's great.
But if one of you lives for football and the other hates sports, that might not work.
5. "What do you think about religion?"
This is not important to everyone, but if religion matters to you, better find out before you even meet.
This should be a big qualifier and is easy enough to ask about.
6. "Where are you, politically?"
With the political climate being so polarized today if politics are important to you, get this question out of the way from the start.
There's no point in ignoring such a taboo topic if you'll end up in an argument about the senate.
7. "What type of relationship are you seeking?"
If you are looking for a serious relationship that could lead to marriage, say so.
You can feel free to ask what your online crush is looking for on the site or app, so you don't waste time on a person who doesn't want the same thing.
No matter how hot or exciting your crush is, if you want something long-term and they want to date around, you have to walk away. Otherwise, you're sure to face heartbreak.
Don't hope to change that person’s mind. Move on to find someone who has the same dating agenda.
Good Questions To Ask Your Crush
8. Do you have plans to relocate in the near future?
9. How long was your last relationship?
10. Do you celebrate holidays?
11. Do you have any allergies?
12. What does your ideal date night look like?
13. Do you have children?
14. What is your favorite late-night snack?
15. How is your relationship with money?
16. What songs are in your playlist?
17. Do you like the outdoors?
18. What is your dream job?
19. Are you a good cook?
20. What is your favorite genre of music?
21. What is your least favorite chore?
22. Do you play any sports?
23. Do you have any siblings?
24. What is your favorite restaurant?
25. What is your favorite movie?
26. What is your guilty pleasure?
27. What is your current living situation?
28. Are you a social drinker?
29. Do you have a best friend?
30. Do you workout often?
31. Do you have a self care regimen?
32. Are you a college graduate?
Deep Questions To Ask Your Crush
33. What motivates you?
34. Have you ever been to therapy?
35. How is your relationship with your mother?
36. How is your relationship with your father?
37. What does commitment mean to you?
38. When was you first heartbreak?
39. How do you unwind after a long day?
40. What is the perfect romantic getaway to you?
41. What accomplishment are you most proud of?
42. What is your biggest fear?
43. What made you cry recently?
44. If you could have lunch with anyone, dead or alive, who would you choose?
45. What are three things you must have with you at all times?
46. What is your personality type?
47. How do you feel about your significant other having friends of the opposite sex?
48. Do you believe in the afterlife?
49. How is your mental health?
50. What is the first thing you think about when you wake up?
51. Are you satisfied with where you are in life right now?
52. What are some of your pet peeves?
53. Do you follow trends?
Flirty Questions To Ask Your Crush
54. Do you kiss and tell?
55. What part of your body do you love the most?
56. What turns you on?
57. Do you prefer kisses or hugs?
58. How do you feel about PDA?
59. When can I see you again?
60. How did you learn how to kiss?
61. How do you know if someone is a good lover?
62. Do you like to be held?
63. Can I kiss you right now?
64. What scent reminds you of me?
65. What are three words that describe my body?
66. What would you say if I told you I had feelings for you?
67. What song would you play for us to slow dance for hours?
68. Would you like to know my favorite part of your body?
69. Truth or dare?
Questions To Ask Your Crush While Texting
70. What did you have for lunch today?
71. What's on your agenda for the day?
72. How did you sleep?
73. Do you see us spending more time with each other?
74. How's work going?
75. Do you want to watch the sunset with me?
76. Do I make you smile?
77. What would we be doing if I were with you right now?
78. What would you say if I asked you to meet up with me later?
79. Can you name one thing you really want to know about me?
80. How do you feel about me right now?
81. Have I crossed your mind today?
82. What are your plans for the weekend?
83. Would you give me your opinion on this outfit?
84. What would you do if I kissed you as soon as I saw you?
85. Can I see a picture of you when you were a baby?
Juicy Questions To Ask Your Crush
86. If you could take back one moment in your life, what would it be?
87. What attracts you to the opposite sex?
88. What was your first thought seeing me for the first time?
89. How would you help me unwind after i've had a long day?
90. How do you know if a person the one for you?
91. What would immediately turn you off about someone?
92. How soon is too soon to propose?
93. Why are you still single?
94. Are you dominant or submissive?
95. Have you ever been in love?
96. Do you trust others easily?
97. What necessary boundaries are needed in relationships?
98. Are you a jealous-natured person?
Random Questions To Ask Your Crush
99. What is your favorite childhood memory?
100. Were you popular in high school?
101. Do you believe in aliens?
102. Do you prefer baths or showers?
103. Can you whistle?
104. Do you believe in magic?
105. What do you do to stay fit?
106. Do you prefer cash or card?
107. Did you skip school a lot?
108. Were you a class clown?
109. What is your favorite ice cream flavor?
110. Are you an early bird or a night owl?
111. Do you have vivid dreams?
112. Do you have a bucket list?
113. Do you make your bed every morning?
114. Do prefer a paperback book or an audiobook?
115. What movies or shows are in your top three recently watched on Netflix?
Use these questions as a guide to help you step out of your comfort zone and get to know more about your crush in a way that doesn't seem like an interrogation or job interview.
Then, you can slowly sprinkle in other questions on future dates.
First, see if you get each other's sense of humor and life perspective, and then get another date. Fun questioning is more subtle and could keep you both from wasting time.
Most importantly, live a little and have fun out there!
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Ronnie Ann Ryan has been a Love & Magical Life Coach for 20 years. She is the author of 7 Ways Your Past Lives Affect Your Love Life Now.